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Submitted by Fred Patten, Furry’s favorite historian and reviewer.

Dawn of the Planet of the Apes: Firestorm, by Greg Keyes. Based on the screenplay written by Mark Bomback and Rick Jaffa & Amanda Silver, based on characters created by Rick Jaffa & Amanda Silver.
London, Titan Books, May 2014, paperback $ and £7.99 (304 pages), Kindle $7.99 and £3.99.

Dawn of the Planet of the Apes: The Official Movie Novelization, by Alex Irvine.
London, Titan Books, July 2014, paperback $ and £7.99 (313 pages), Kindle $7.99 and £3.79.

La Planète des Singes, the original novel, was written by Pierre Boule in France and published in January 1963. Forget about it. It has almost nothing to do with the movies except inspiring the first of them.

Planet of the Apes, the first movie, was produced by 20th Century Fox and released in April 1968. Boulle’s novel was so extensively rewritten by numerous hands as to create an original plot. It was mega-popular, launching numerous theatrical sequels, TV spinoffs, novels and novelizations, and comic books. The comic books have arguably birthed the most bizarre variations in the form of authorized teamups. Tarzan on the Planet of the Apes. Green Lantern on the Planet of the Apes.

But we digress. All (with one exception) of the movies and TV series have had paperback novelizations and authorized prequels or sequels. Beneath the Planet of the Apes, the first movie sequel, was novelized by Michael Avallone. Most of the other books have been by different authors. Here are the two written for Dawn of the Planet of the Apes, the next to last movie.

The Planet of the Apes movies can be roughly divided into two groups. The first includes the first movie in 1968 and its four sequels through 1973, plus two TV series. They are set in 3978 A.D. and the next few years, when time-traveling American astronauts find that intelligent chimpanzees, orangutans, and gorillas have replaced humanity. The first movie was remade in 2001. Not only did that have a novelization by William T. Quick, he wrote two paperback sequels. The second group, telling how the apes replaced humanity, began in 2011 with Rise of the Planet of the Apes.

Rise of the Planet of the Apes is the only movie that did not have a book, only a six-issue comic book prequel. In the near future Will Rodman is a scientist at Gen Sys, a San Francisco biotech company testing ALZ112, a viral-based drug designed to cure Alzheimer’s disease. The drug is tested on chimpanzees and unexpectedly greatly increases their intelligence. Rodman’s superior has the chimps killed, but Will and his assistant discover that a female had just had a baby. Will names the infant chimp Caesar and raises him as his own son. Events result in Caesar being taken from Will and imprisoned in the San Bruno Primate Shelter, where he learns to distrust humanity except Will. Gen Sys experiments with ALZ113, a more powerful aerosol drug. Caesar escapes, steals the ALZ113 from Will’s house, and returns to the shelter to raise the intelligence of all the apes there. They all escape under Caesar’s leadership, add apes from Gen Sys and the San Francisco Zoo, and form an army to battle the humans as they cross the Golden Gate Bridge into nearby Muir Woods. Will goes after them and begs Caesar to surrender since the apes cannot defeat all humanity, but Caesar’s loyalty is now with the other apes. However, mixed with a few earlier scenes and the movie’s closing credits is a foretelling that while the ALZ113 increases apes’ intelligence, it creates an Ebola-like lightning fatal pandemic in humans.

Dawn of the Planet of the Apes: Firestorm is “The Official PREQUEL to the Dramatic New Film from 20th Century Fox”. It was “The all-new bridge between Rise of the Planet of the Apes [released August 5, 2011] and Dawn of the Planet of the Apes,” published two months before Dawn was released on July 11, 2014.

Firestorm tells several stories simultaneously. It begins less than a week after Rise. San Francisco is calming down after “Monkeygate”, the strange simian escape across the Golden Gate Bridge, and focusing on the coming mayoral election between incumbent Mayor House and ex-police chief Dreyfus. The news is claiming that only ten or twenty apes have escaped, not hundreds. And the first deaths come from the new disease.

The interlocked stories, all sympathetic, are those of the apes under Caesar to reach a place of safety; a team sent to catch them, including primatologist Clancy Stoppard and a Congo expert ape tracker, Malakai Youmans; Dr. Natalia Kosar of one of San Francisco’s major hospitals, who is the first to get patients of the new plague; Dreyfus, the mayoral challenger; and the biography of the chimpanzee Koba, one of Caesar’s lieutenants.

Clancy and the older Malakai, who become friends, become aware that all the others on the team sent after the apes are not police or animal experts but professional hunters employed by Anvil, a private paramilitary contractor. Anvil’s team leader, Corbin, is impatient with the two “civilians”, and there are doubts that their rifles are only tranquilizer-dart guns. Caesar and his closest newly-intelligent lieutenants, the chimpanzees Koba and Rocket and Maurice, an orangutan, try to escape without harming any humans, but as they become increasingly desperate, the risk of deadly violence increases. The apes cannot talk in speech; they use sign language. Talia Kosar, an ER doctor, sees her accident and crime patients replaced by the new plague patients, who quickly overwhelm the hospital. In less than two weeks, San Francisco has over ten thousand fatalities, and there is widespread panicking. Dreyfus, the mayoral candidate, uses the plague in his campaign but he is genuinely concerned for the city’s welfare, and he provides the leadership that the incumbent mayor doesn’t. Koba’s life story before Caesar frees the apes and they become intelligent is full of human mistreatment and brutality. This justifies the apes’ escape, and also explains Koba’s hatred of all humans.

The apes’ stories are outnumbered by the multiple human’s stories, but they are all fast-moving and dramatic:

“Then she [Talia] turned toward him. ‘What’s up?’

‘You went to that symposium on respiratory infection last month.’

‘Mm-hmm,’ she said. ‘Sexiest symposium ever. Better than that rectal bleeding thing, even.’

‘I’ve got a woman I’d like you to take a look at.’

‘What are her symptoms?’

‘She’s sneezing up blood,’ he said.

‘Allergic rhinitis?’

‘She says she never has trouble with allergies – I had a look, and didn’t see anything,’ he said. ‘I’ve ordered a CT scan, but they’re backed up. Plus, she has a temperature of a hundred and four. She’s also showing some signs of subcutaneous bleeding.’

Talia was about to take another grudging drink, but stopped with the coffee cup halfway to her mouth.

‘How old is she?’ she asked.

‘Thirty-two.’

‘Let me see her,’ she said.” (p. 20)

They are well blended so the reader does not know what is coming next.

The scenes with the apes will be of most interest. They do not have human vocal chords, but Caesar has learned human sign language from Will Rodman and he teaches it to what he thinks are the brightest of the apes that he gives “Will’s mist” to:

“Rocket spotted the helicopter first, and a moment’s observation showed the machine coming straight for them.

Find this many, he [Caesar] signed to Rocket, holding up six fingers. Go, and be quick. Then he raced back down, leaping from tree to tree, toward the main body of his troop. Most were in the middle canopy, and he searched through them, making low calming noises, until he found one [of] the orangutans, Maurice. Maurice knew the hand language that Caesar had been taught.

Calm them, he told Maurice. Make them quiet, and lead them in that direction. He pointed off toward a thicker region of the woods, away from the approaching helicopter.” (p. 30)

Dawn of the Planet of the Apes: Firestorm is both suspenseful and fatalistic. The reader knows that whatever happens in the story, the Simian Flu will ultimately kill almost all humans and destroy civilization. Greg Keyes is a New York Times bestselling author of both original s-f/fantasy novels and many novels set in movie & TV s-f franchises.

Dawn of the Planet of the Apes: The Official Movie Novelization is set ten years later. It is quickly obvious that Alex Irvine’s writing style is much wordier and more leisurely than Greg Keyes; filled with more description than dialogue.

The first chapters establish the apes’ village, in a rainy forest near San Francisco:

“Their home, which lay behind a wall of timbers and a heavy gate, spiraled around the flanks of the mountain. It was a place made for them.

Apes looked over the walls and hung from the timbers higher up the mountain, hooting out excited welcomes as they watched the troop approach. The noise increased as news of the hunting party’s return spread.

[…] There was a central open area anchored by a large fire pit. Around it scattered clusters of huts and lean-tos followed the natural shape of the mountain’s slopes, continuing along the edge of a steep canyon bridged by fallen trees. The sound of the river rushing through the bottom of the canyon rose and fell with the seasons. […]

The village was united by a network of paths along the ground and timbers in the air, running from higher slopes to the branches of larger trees that grew within the walls. These trees, which served as lookout posts and homes, were connected to each other by woven grass ropes and swinging bridges.” (pgs. 16-17)

The apes are still led by Caesar and his lieutenants, Koba and Rocket, and their almost-adolescent sons, Caesar’s Blue Eyes and Rocket’s Ash. The apes ride horses, and hunt the elk and bears that have multiplied since man’s disappearance. Maurice has become a teacher in their village. It is close enough to San Francisco that the human city can be seen in the distance:

“Caesar had gotten them off to a good start. He would lead the apes until he was no longer able, and then his children and their children would spread over the world.

Perhaps someday they would return to the city where they had come from. He looked over it now from the upper part of his house, the side that faced away from the canyon and toward the jumbled hills and the ocean, far away, gleaming orange under the setting sun. Caesar remembered the first time he climbed one of the great redwoods and looked at the city, back when Will was alive. There had been so much motion then […]

Now he saw the city from much farther away. The air was clear and nothing moved. In the shadows among the buildings, no lights came on as the sun sank into the ocean.” (pgs. 29-30)

“I wonder if they really are all gone, he signed.

Ten winters now, Maurice signed. And for the last two, no sign of them. He shrugged. They must be.

Caesar wasn’t so sure. Humans had been strong enough and smart enough to create great cities. They had made roads across the world. They had built machines that could fly. Will had told him once that humans had even walked on the moon. If they could do that, what could kill all of them off? He knew some of them had been sick when the apes had escaped after becoming smarter, but apes got sick sometimes, too.

Yet no sickness killed them all.” (p. 31)

The humans are not all dead, of course, but they don’t appear until page 39, in Chapter 9 that establishes that Blue Eyes and Ash are best friends, but Blue Eyes resents that Ash is allowed more freedom than Caesar gives him.

The few human survivors have coalesced in San Francisco and are just beginning, with their children, to spread out again. Their group consists of five adult men led by Malcolm, his wife Ellie, and his son Alex. Malcolm is a reasonable man, but one of the others, Carver, is trigger-happy. He wounds Ash and almost starts a new ape-human war. Caesar lets the human leave, but everything is new from there. The apes, with spears and clubs, have to prepare for a new confrontation with humans with guns and worse.

Caesar sends Koba and his lieutenants, Grey and Stone, to follow the humans and report back. In this movie and novelization, Koba’s hatred of humans is intensified to fanatacism. Koba at first considers himself a loyal follower of Caesar, but that Caesar is too peaceful and the humans too aggressive. Koba is determined to kill all the humans this time, if he has to kill Carsar, blame it on the humans, and take over leadership of the apes.

The human Colony, in an unfinished skyscraper in downtown San Francisco, is led by Dreyfus.

“The lower twenty floors or so had flooring, and had been turned into housing for the few thousand people who, for all they knew, were the last surviving humans on earth. The bottom six floors occupied the entire block, and enclosed what had been envisioned as an upscale mall and luxury office complex.

Dreyfus had chosen the location carefully. The triple arch of the building’s main gateway was easily defended, and other entrances had been blocked for years. At first they had built defenses against gangs and loose militias that had ravaged the city during the plague’s first years. As time went on and more and more people died, however, many of those marauders ‘came in from the cold,’ as it were, joining what came to be called the Colony.” (p. 62)

Under other circumstances Dreyfus would have been happy to ignore the apes, but the apes’ village is near a dam that the Colony needs for hydroelectric power. Also, if the apes have spears and clubs, now that they know there are human survivors, will they attack? Dreyfus and Malcolm want to prepare for defense of the human Colony if necessary, while Carver and his followers want to take warfare to the apes.

Malcolm gets Dreyfus to put him in charge of a peaceful mission to get the apes to let them restart the hydroelectric dam. Carver sabotages that, which is what Koba needs to shoot Caesar with a stolen human gun and lead the apes to attack the Colony. Read the novelization or see the movie for the details of what happens; but to summarize, Malcolm and his family nurse Caesar back to health, Caesar realizes that apes can be as corrupt and untrustworthy as humans, Caesar takes back leadership of the apes after a fight to the death with Koba, and the apes prepare to defend themselves against another group of humans from a military base with advanced weapons.

See War for the Planet of the Apes (2017) for the sequel. Its book prequel and movie novelization will be reviewed in the future. These two Dawn books are well-written and worth reading, especially Firestorm. The movie novelization, which is a bit slow, may be skippable for those who are familiar with the movie.

– Fred Patten

• Buy Dawn of the Planet of the Apes: Firestorm on Amazon
• Buy the Novelization of Dawn of the Planet of the Apes on Amazon

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This one passed beneath our radar (perhaps naturally!) but we managed to catch it at Long Beach Comic Con. Nathaniel Osollo is an underground cartoonist who specializes in black & white… and funny animal noir. His most famous creation is Dark Mouse, “a disgruntled mouse with drinking and violence problems and a penchant for lady mice”. Whew. His first collection on paper is called I Used To Know Dark Mouse, but you can read it entirely on line at issuu.com. His web site, Eye Draugh (get it?) has more of Dark Mouse and other creations.

image c. 2017 by Nathaniel Osollo

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Anthem.video (A Pittsburgh based production company) goes to Anthrocon 2017 and film the experience. I'm sure for ... reasons .... or something. http://anthem.video/ [1] [1] http://anthem.video/
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Ever wondered if you should attend a writing retreat? What happens there? What will I achieve by attending? Welcome to a part two of where we try to answer those questions and more!

Ocean flew off to RAWR 2017 and recorded two podcasts while there. It’s now the last night before everyone heads home. The retreat is almost over. The frantic writing, critiquing and comradery is coming to an end, so Ocean sits down to discuss the amazing experience with the other attendees: Buni, NightEyes, Ryft, Otter and TJ. They talk about what it was like, what they learned, and what this retreat did for them.

Currently applications are open for RAWR 2017
If you are interested in RAWR, find out more and apply at: http://www.rawr.community/
Or follow them on twitter at: @RAWRWorkshop

Find the other attendees at:
Buni
@TJMinde 
@Ryft_Sarri
NightEyes
@runningotter

Ep 76 – Post-RAWR - Ever wondered if you should attend a writing retreat? What happens there? What will I achieve by attending? Welcome to a part two of where we try to answer those questions and more! Ocean flew off to RAWR 2017 and recorded two podcasts while there.

Thanks to Summercat for this guest post.

The Tower and the Fox is the Kyell Gold novel I’ve been waiting for him to write for years, and it has been worth the wait.

Like many people, I was entranced with The Prisoner’s Release and the rest of the Volle stories, but most of Kyell Gold’s work did not resonate with me, as he primarily wrote for the genre of “Coming of Age Gay Romance”. There’s nothing wrong with the genre, and the struggle to find one’s place in the world in the context of romance (and lots of gay sex) certainly can speak to multiple generations of furries.

Only, I never had those struggles and I tend to skip sex scenes in my furry novels. The prevalent nature of the genre has turned me off to a lot of written Furry fiction, even to the point I hesitate to read what I know would be clean. Yet even then, I enjoyed Kyell’s worldbuilding and storytelling. I felt Shadow of the Father was a fine novel that would have been improved by the removal of the sexual content, and had hoped to one day see Kyell’s skill turned towards a more traditional fantasy.

There’s not even a romance subplot in The Tower and The Fox, and the story is stronger for it.

The Tower and The Fox takes place in an alternate and magical history, set sometime after the Napoleonic Wars have ended. The North American colonies remain part of the Empire, with the only mention of a historical figure being John Adams. However, this is a world of humans, and the Calatians – magically-created animal-human hybrids – are a minority, and an ill-treated one at that, for many humans see them as naught but beasts, with many rights denied to them.

The story’s narration follows Kip, a fox Calatian, as he enters the Prince George’s College of Sorcery to be the first Calatian sorcerer. He is eventually joined by his otter friend Coppy, and makes friends with other students, including Emily, who wishes to be the first female sorcerer.

The book covers the time between the student’s admission and the selection of the Masters for their apprentices. We see Kip and his friends have to deal with challenges from other students, their teachers, and their own personal issues, with the selection of students near the end.

The construction of the plot was nothing new or unexpected, yet Kyell’s work on polishing makes it seem fresh. In addition, the different struggles and prejudices the characters each face are displayed wonderfully without being preachy. The novel ends in a set up for a sequel while still tying many loose ends. There are unanswered questions remaining, but I was left knowing that the characters would get to them in time rather than wonder if they had forgotten.

In the end, I lost track of time while reading The Tower and The Fox, and didn’t put the book down until I finished it. If you are a fan of Kyell Gold’s work or interested in a Furry Colonial Fantasy, I definitely suggest picking up a copy.

– Summercat

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Dear Papabear,

I wasn’t really expecting to have to ask for help with this, but as it turns out, my emotions have surprised me, and I find myself in need of some help.

As you may or may not know, I’ve recently become a property owner for the first time, aged 23, with a little 1-bedroom house that’s big enough just for a single rodent. And, despite being a bit frightened of total independence to begin with, I’ve actually grown quite excited about having my own place. I’ve already been envisioning ideas of how to redecorate it to be something all my own (well, as much as it can be, given it’s Grade II listed), and also being able to plan life to my own needs.

Despite this, part of the reason I’ve had to get a place of my own is because my mum has been trying to sell the family home so she can downsize to something cheaper. The reasons for this are complicated and would need a letter all their own if I even attempted to explain it, so let’s just say this decision is for the greater good. And, less than a week ago, we’ve managed to find someone who’s made an offer for the house. That doesn’t mean its outright sold, but the chances of us officially selling are highly likely.

So now, pretty much being given the official word that I’m going to be moving out, a few fears have struck me by surprise.

For one thing, there’s the matter of adjusting to my new life in my new home. It might sound rather daft, but I think the thing I’m going to miss most about this house isn’t the memories of what I’ve done here or how big the rooms are, but it’s the layout of this place. I have my little routines attached here, like how when I come home from work, I instantly walk through the kitchen and utility room to my downstairs bedroom/office and check my updates on my tablet, which I usually leave by my bed. And, being autistic, any sort of change often becomes a stressful event, so repetition and sticking to routines is very much a comforter for me in a world where things can become so chaotic and disjointed. With my new home, it’s going to be a whole new routine of how I live my life, and I’m not sure how quickly I’ll be able to adjust to this place. When I went to the USA for my first ever FurCon, I gave myself over a year to book things and mentally prepare myself for the journey. All I’ve been given for adjusting to my new life is 12 weeks!

For another thing, I don’t know how I’m going to be able to support mum during the move. This was essentially her dream home, and she’s put her heart and soul into making this place both her home, and her business (we run it as a Bed & Breakfast). So, now that it’s going to be switching hands and that she’s going to have to remove all her belongings and will pretty much be barred from entering this house ever again, this is going to be a big emotional hit for her. She told me from the day she put this house on the market that she was going to cry when the time came that she’d move out, and I really don’t know how I’m going to be able to comfort her when that day comes. It always hurts me deep when I see her in pain, and again, 12 weeks isn’t long for me to prepare myself for this!

I should probably make it clear that this isn’t the first time either of us have moved. We moved to this place some 14 years ago, essentially moving countries in the process (England to Wales) to start anew. However, in those 14 years, in one way or another, we both have grown attached to this place. I have with my routines and habits, and mum has put her heart and soul into making it hers. And, now that those attachments we’ve grown are going to be broken, I’m not sure how either of us are going to be able to cope.

Sorry for making this somewhat two questions in one (I know you have your “One Question per Letter” rule), but I guess what I’m asking in general is how can I be able to cope with this move, both dealing with my own stress and my mother’s?

Thank you for taking the time to read my letter, Papa Bear!

Hugs,
Charleston

* * *
 
Dear Charleston,
 
Well, yes, in a sense this is more than one question, but they really are all related; they are all about the attachment to things. Buddhism teaches us that the attachment to things is the source of pain, and this is very true.
 
I’m familiar with what you and your mother are going through. I’ve moved several times after being attached to homes and it can be gut-wrenching. The move from my 1865 brick Michigan home to a kind of crappy apartment in Palm Springs was a huge hit on my heart. The Michigan home was a place I loved and the last place my wife and I lived together, as well as where my beloved dog Keisha spent her life and died. Moving to California was very much like moving to another country; it is culturally extremely different from the Midwest. I remember moving my stuff into the apartment. It was October, and a flight of Canada geese flew overhead, just like in Michigan, and I wept with homesickness.
 
But I got over it. And now I love my new home and have absolutely NO desire to return to Michigan, believe me.
 
Humans love the familiar because it is comforting. Familiar surroundings and routines give us a base of stability in a chaotic world. Big life changes like the one you are going through, too, are especially challenging when you are autistic.
 
Let’s address you first, and your new little house. The first thing I would suggest is to try and transfer as many familiar things to your new home as possible. Also, try and arrange it as close as possible to how you have it in your current home. The more familiar objects in your house the better. Right now, I bet, when you looked at the new house and decided to buy it, it didn’t look anything like your house now, and this might have made you a little anxious. Try to imagine it with your stuff in it. Picture this every day until you move there. Figuring out exactly where to put chairs, photographs, tchotchkes, and so on. You might try taking a paper and pencil, drawing out the floor plan, and writing in where you want things. A good mental exercise that could calm you. Keep in mind not only the objects, but also the paths they create when you walk between them. Try to make these paths similar to the current ones (although the multiple floor pathway is not an option). It won’t be exactly the same, of course. But you can make it similar. Paint the walls a similar color. Even put in light fixtures and light switch plates that match the current home.
 
As for your mother, I’m guessing she is doing this move for financial reasons? Or perhaps the current home is just getting too much to maintain. Remind her, please, that the house is a home not because of its walls and windows and doors but because of who lives there. I’m reading between the lines here, but is this may be more about your moving out and her being alone than the house itself?
 
I’m not sure where your and your mom’s new homes are, but hopefully they are not too far apart that you can’t visit her. I know you are concerned about your mom and being there for her, so try to be there for her. During the move and soon after, you should visit often, but over time it would be healthier to gradually make the visits a little less often. Let her transition into this new phase of life slowly as you transition into yours.
 
For both you and your mom, focus on the positive aspects of this new phase in your lives. For you, this will be more independence and more self-confidence; for her, it will hopefully be less stress and a more peaceful, simpler life. Also, keep in mind you still have each other in your lives; that won’t change.
 
Life is about change. Change can be scary and nerve-wracking, but eventually we adjust to the new circumstances, which will, hopefully, make us stronger.
 
Hugs,
Papabear

Shreya Shetty (try saying that three times fast!) is an illustrator and concept artist with a history in Hollywood productions. She has worked for companies like Rhythm & Hues, Wizards of the Coast, and Toon Studios on projects as diverse as Life of Pi, Dreamworks’ Home, and Percy Jackson: Sea of Monsters. At her web site you’ll see many of her finished paintings of magical monsters and some cute familiar creatures, many of which she also sells as prints.

image c. 2017 by Shreya Shetty

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CJ redeemed his Good Boy™ qualities by actually showing up this week, though admittedly late. Lots of news in this one!

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Watch Video Link Roundup:

• Boozy makes primer video about art contracts
  • Keen Firefox’s twitter comment
• @SashoWolf finds furry novel at local library
• Snickers Fantasy Commercial (feat. a centaur)
• JibKodi steals cookies!
• The Sun does a piece on Rainy Chaos
• 2017 is 69% complete
• Creator of Bojack Horseman tweets that he will be tweeting about Bojack Horseman a lot
• Adult Happy Dog Costume

News:

• Fur Affinity updates code of conduct to disallow hate groups
• New Milford councilman resigns after furor over “furry” activities
• Peppa Pig “Spiders Can’t Hurt You” Episode Removed From TV In Australia
• AI Trying To Design Inspirational Posters Goes Horribly And Hilariously Wrong
• Red Balloons Are Popping Up On Storm Grates Ahead Of ‘It’ Movie
• Delivery Driver Boxes in Owners
• Suspected Bank Robber Strips Naked
• Tinder Date Gone Wrong

FC-277 RIP Syndrome - CJ redeemed his Good Boy™ qualities by actually showing up this week, though admittedly late. Lots of news in this one!

CJ redeemed his Good Boy qualities by actually showing up this week, though admittedly late. Lots of news in this one!

Download MP3

Watch Video Link Roundup:

• Boozy makes primer video about art contracts
  • Keen Firefox’s twitter comment
• @SashoWolf finds furry novel at local library
• Snickers Fantasy Commercial (feat. a centaur)
• JibKodi steals cookies!
• The Sun does a piece on Rainy Chaos
• 2017 is 69% complete
• Creator of Bojack Horseman tweets that he will be tweeting about Bojack Horseman a lot
• Adult Happy Dog Costume

News:

• Fur Affinity updates code of conduct to disallow hate groups
• New Milford councilman resigns after furor over “furry” activities
• Peppa Pig “Spiders Can’t Hurt You” Episode Removed From TV In Australia
• AI Trying To Design Inspirational Posters Goes Horribly And Hilariously Wrong
• Red Balloons Are Popping Up On Storm Grates Ahead Of ‘It’ Movie
• Delivery Driver Boxes in Owners
• Suspected Bank Robber Strips Naked
• Tinder Date Gone Wrong

FC-277 RIP Syndrome - CJ redeemed his Good Boy™ qualities by actually showing up this week, though admittedly late. Lots of news in this one!

CJ redeemed his Good Boy™ qualities by actually showing up this week, though admittedly late. Lots of news in this one!

Download MP3

Link Roundup:

• Boozy makes primer video about art contracts
  • Keen Firefox’s twitter comment
• @SashoWolf finds furry novel at local library
• Snickers Fantasy Commercial (feat. a centaur)
• JibKodi steals cookies!
• The Sun does a piece on Rainy Chaos
• 2017 is 69% complete
• Creator of Bojack Horseman tweets that he will be tweeting about Bojack Horseman a lot
• Adult Happy Dog Costume

News:

• Fur Affinity updates code of conduct to disallow hate groups
• New Milford councilman resigns after furor over “furry” activities
• Peppa Pig “Spiders Can’t Hurt You” Episode Removed From TV In Australia
• AI Trying To Design Inspirational Posters Goes Horribly And Hilariously Wrong
• Red Balloons Are Popping Up On Storm Grates Ahead Of ‘It’ Movie
• Delivery Driver Boxes in Owners
• Suspected Bank Robber Strips Naked
• Tinder Date Gone Wrong

[Live] RIP Syndrome

Submitted by Fred Patten, Furry’s favorite historian and reviewer.

The Tower and the Fox, by Tim Susman. Illustrated by Laura Garabedian.
Dallas, TX, Argyll Productions, June 2017, trade paperback $17.95 (265 pages, ebook $9.95.

Grump! This begins in media res, with 19-year-old fox-Calatian Kip Penfold grasping the locked gate of Prince George’s College of Sorcery in New Cambridge, Massachusetts in the early 1800s. Anything further that I say about it would be a spoiler.

Well, if the book’s blurb can give away several spoilers, so can I. The setting is a world like ours, but with magic. Think Harry Potter. Magic has apparently always existed. There were Sumerian and Akkadian sorcerers. The first Calatians (anthropomorphic animals) were created by magic in 1402. Magic helped win the War of the Roses in 1480. There has not yet been an American Revolution, and the British North American Colonies are still loyal to the Crown, although some people are restive about that. Others are unhappy with the social order of the times: Europeans › Colonists › Irish › slaves/Negroes › women › Calatians. The social order of the last four is uncertain; maybe females rank slightly higher than male Irish or Negroes, or Calatians are higher than them. But all four are definitely inferior to human Caucasian menfolk, Continental or Colonial. (Where the American Indians stand in this is uncertain.)

“He turned on his heel. Emily shouted after him, ‘Why do we have to prove ourselves?’ but he did not respond, nor turn, and this time she did not pursue him.

Kip felt a sinking feeling in his chest, watching the sorcerer walk away. ‘Because we always have to prove ourselves,’ he said. ‘Because of how we look.’

‘Rubbish,’ Emily said. ‘We’re living in the age of enlightenment, for God’s sake. There’s no reason a woman can’t be a sorcerer. Nor a Calatian, for that matter.’

‘I hope not.’ Kip rubbed his paws together. ‘But none has, not ever.’

Because of people like him.’ She didn’t have to specify whom she meant. ‘Because of people who think men are the only capable creatures God made. Only men can own property or have a voice in government. Can you own property?’” (p. 11)

In a sense, this is a typical British schoolboy novel in a fantasy setting. The main characters are the four “unnatural” applicants to the College: Philip “Kip” Penfold, a fox-Calatian; his friend Copper “Coppey” Lutris, an otter-Calatian; Emily Carswell, a human woman; and Malcolm O’Brien, an Irishman*. There have never been any but White (Caucasian) male sorcerers before, but an emergency situation has forced the College to open itself to a wider call for applicants – “any Colonist of magical inclination and ability may apply” – and the four take advantage of it.

Despite the official call for applicants, there are those among both the college faculty and the other students who consider it disgraceful that non-Whites (including Irish), animals/Calatians, and women are allowed to become students. They are determined to make them fail.

“The rest of the exam proceeded much like that; when Kip gave the correct answer, Patris said nothing. When he gave a correct answer that could be better worded, or was slightly incomplete, Patris corrected him with a slight sneer of condescension.

Forty-five minutes into the examination, Patris said curtly, ‘You are done.’ He made two more marks on Kip’s paper and then shuffled it aside.   He didn’t even look up to meet Kip’s eyes.

Kip walked out the back without a word, but had to walk back and forth to work off his anger before he could sit down with the others. Coppy had been treated much the same, but it didn’t bother him. ‘Least he listened to me,’ he said.

Emily, though, was still furious. ‘Whenever I didn’t know something, he would say, ‘as I expected,’ or he would just smile, and once I was so angry that I said. ‘If people would take the time to teach mathematics to women, they would find many willing to learn,’ and he said, ‘women do not have the proper parts of their brains to learn mathematics.’ Aren’t they supposed to be intelligent here? I expected him to start measuring my skull with calipers to see how in balance my humors were! It’s completely laughable.’” (pgs. 65-66)

The Tower and the Fox covers the first semester of the College of Sorcery’s new class. In addition to internal dissention, Kip has to face disapproval among his own Calatians in New Cambridge– some feel that he is putting himself above the place of Calatians by trying to learn magic at the College, and that social retribution will fall on all Calatians – and some in the government oppose letting any Calatians learn magic for fear they will join the growing revolutionary movement seeking independence for the Colonies from the British Empire. Kip just wants to learn magic for his own sake, but each of his friends and enemies have their own motives – and magic ensures that the College’s Masters do not know as much as they believe they do.

Tim Susman wrote or edited his first three books (Breaking the Ice, Shadows in Snow, and Common and Precious) under his own name from 2002 to 2007. In 2005 he began using the pseudonym of Kyell Gold, and has written two dozen books under that name, including many award-winners. Now he is returning to his own name with The Calatians, of which this is Book One. The Tower and the Fox has a cover and nineteen chapter-heading drawings by Laura Garabedian. It comes to a satisfactory conclusion, but the adventures of Kip Penfold and his human and Calatian friends and enemies – not to mention demons and elementals – are just beginning.

*If you think the Irish were considered White men by the British upper classes before World War I, I have some old British racist jokes for you. One stuffy British colonel to another: “I say, who do you consider the most reliable Colonial troops to be? The Gurkhas? The West Africans?” “Oh, the Irish, definitely. When led by White officers.”

– Fred Patten

• Buy on Fur Planet
• Buy E-Book on Bad Dog Books

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This year at the Long Beach Comic Con we found a crafter named Dana Duncan who creates and sells art under the name The Pink Owlette. Yes, owls figure prominently in her designs, but so do cats (in space, or in cactus — go figure!) and foxes and unicorns, among other animals. She works those designs into enamel pinks, iron-on patches, and various fashion items and accessories. Check out her web site to see the latest of what she’s been up to.

image c. 2017 by Dana Duncan

Go chicken go! It's a new song from schmoyoho about transforming chicken ninjas.
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“Through Being Cool” by Devo

We’re through being cool
We’re through being cool

Eliminate the ninnies and the twits
Going to bang some heads
Going to beat some butts
Time to show those evil spuds what’s what

If you live in a small town
You might meet a dozen or two
Young alien types who step out
And dare to declare

We’re through being cool

In three stories I’m sharing today, look for small-town closed-mindedness.  It’s a force that propels many furries. If you’re young, have a big imagination and live in a place that can’t contain it, what do you do? Make friends out there in the furry world.  That was me in the mid-to-late 90’s (Woof! It sure wasn’t a phase), so there’s no lack of personal experience for the connections I’m making.

These stories happened in smallish cities near New England: West Windsor NJ (population 27,000), Burlington VT (population 42,000), and – in this week’s news – New Milford CT (population 28,000). They show a bit of political fursecution, honest-to-dog.

OK, they aren’t black and white. They have issues for debate like 1) throwing an overstuffed party, 2) regulating hate groups, or 3) representing political constituents with an acceptable image. But then there’s freedom to have fun and hobbies (or even express private, consenting kink), instead of being forced into a closet made of overbearing judgement. Who was really harmed in these stories – judgers, or furries themselves?

While you read, stay positive. New Milford is the closest location to the new Tiny Paws con, this weekend. They can’t hold furries down!

Art by Autumn Sunrise

1) The NJ FurBQ hoax of 2012. Media: NJ.com – Communitynews.org –  Fox 5 News video – Dogpatch Press

The town council of West Windsor wanted to shut down volunteer emergency services based at a community center. Meanwhile, the community center was being used by the community; one of the volunteers organized a popular furry party there. It had fun and fursuiting, DJ’s and almost 200 adults enjoying beer and being boisterous (shock, horror.) What happened next resembled Mayberry in the 1950’s, if you switched Red Scare with Yiff Panic.  A town council member claimed to have photos of fursuiters humping on a car. News media piled on with their best stab at smearing adults for legal drinking and saying a swear word or two. The scapegoat was set up, and the council knocked it down with a vote to remove the community center funding and emergency service with it.

Livejournal comment

It was a perfect hit, except… the photos didn’t exist, and the council member hadn’t been there. The details only came out after online confusion where many furries bought the “fursuit sex” story, and rushed to blame each other for bad behavior that never happened.

Although the party was on Memorial Day in May, suspiciously, the news was released to exactly coincide with the spike of Anthrocon promotion in July. The volunteer service and $45,000 of funding were replaced with six figures worth of paid service (hmm, I wonder what crony got paid?)  There was also an election for a mayor (who just finished his fifth and final term in 2017). Furries were used as a big fluffy doormat for political gain.

2) Vermont fursuiters fight prejudice in 2015. Media: SevendaysVT.com / update – VPR.net – Dogpatch Press / update

Burlington had a public Mardi Gras event attended by costumers including the Vermont Furs. They were active organizers of charity events and had recently been invited to liven up an official Christmas tree lighting in a nearby town.  But an official told them that fursuiting wasn’t allowed in the town commons. Others wore masks for the event, so why stop fursuiters? They were told it was “just different”. A 1960’s-era law intended to stop masked KKK activity was cited. The furries applied for an entertainer’s permit (for buskers who made money) but the city gave them a paperwork runaround.

As a common theme in these stories, this one also hinted about sensational furry fear. The town mentioned a Times Square incident where a “bootleg Elmo” mascot hassled someone. I commented that it was hundreds of miles away and involved panhandling for money, not fursuiting.  And comments on my article reached for stereotype about a “babyfur” with no evidence. No harm mentioned, just labels. Again furries were bashing each other.

Eventually, the ACLU stepped in and backed the Vermont Furries. They tied the issue to political protests attended by masked Anonymous protesters. Furries went in front of the town council and got the law amended to only apply to masked crime. This time, being engaged with the lawmakers gained a positive resolution through nonjudgemental listening to others.

3) Connecticut councilman forced to resign by unwilling exposure of furry hobby. Media: Newstimes.com – NY Post

New Milford residents were upset to see Rick Agee‘s post on the town’s Facebook group. It smeared a Democrat town councilman elected in 2015. In the google cache and a screenshot, it got 68 comments and was a gallery revealing a private Sofurry profile that’s now gone.

I compared public accounts of this fellow furry. Their written profile portrays a nice older married person who is creative and seems to care about others. But these were used against him:

1. There was weak separation of life and hobby. Their twitter has pics of their political role mixed with their fursuit by Sarahcat. He might as well have doxed himself. Not that you should have to worry if you’re a good person; but sadly others took the choice away.
2. The closed SoFurry profile shows F-List-like topics. The info suggests this was written fiction and RP – for reading or writing with consenting adults – but no implication of practicing stuff that shouldn’t be. Furries are typically gentle and tolerant about such expression, but it’s liable to shock a small-town Facebook audience when it’s yanked out of private context.
3. FA has yiff art from a comic. It’s labeled a soap opera, and does looks like very emotionally-focused narrative, something furries excel at – using cartoons to depict more humanity than ‘regular’ porn. It’s a shame that outsiders don’t understand how that’s positive, but they didn’t and it wasn’t hidden.

Here’s what followed the unwilling exposure:

On Thursday night, as town Democrats held a previously scheduled opening ceremony of party headquarters on Bank Street, a small group of protesters gathered outside.  Among them was Rick Agee, the resident who had made the original Facebook post. He carried a sign saying, “No perverts running our town!” – ”I have kids and grandkids in this town, and I don’t want him representing us,” Agee said.

@kt_domino noticed: “Rick Agee uses his company’s twitter to support the GOP.”

Wait, how did barging onto someone else’s private page involve kids?  Was there a reason someone HAD to? That’s the entire issue from this side; why don’t people just ask, or talk and listen about this stuff if it’s necessary?  Wouldn’t society be better with appreciation of healthy sexuality in all it’s permutations (even harmless “age play”, to some extent)?  Well, that isn’t the world we live in. Understanding gets stomped by judgement and power. There’s more in a followup post on the town page that’s still live. Facebook reaction post – Mayor’s post. It ties to an upcoming reelection campaign.

Politics is ugly. Anyone in it has to lock down their private life extra hard. Anything will be used against them.

— Wuff-in-Disguise Ren (@RenDireWolf) September 8, 2017

This guy didn’t hurt anyone for real.  The concerns these people are giving go far beyond the mayor’s careful wording about “higher standard”; they are trashing him for things that most fellow furries know he probably isn’t doing – in the balance of things, fears should be outweighed by knowing that expressing kink is mentally healthy and it’s his private business.

But mistakes were made. Not every place can be like it is near my den in San Francisco. The world crushes idealism, but it grows in the furry community anyways. Wherever you are, try to support each other, don’t fall for fearmongering, and stay safe and happy, furry friends.

Let me give the last word to the former councilman, as he wrote in 2014: “Our most enduring value as furs is the right to be who and what we want.”

UPDATE:

1. I HAVE MET THIS MAN.

2. HE IS AMAZINGLY GENEROUS TO CHARITIES.

3. THESE PEOPLE ARE MORONS. https://t.co/EmilAcSa3X

— Boozy Badger (@BoozyBadger) September 8, 2017

Perhaps he should take up residence in Pittsburgh.

— Uncle Kage (@Unclekage) September 8, 2017

This article characterizes furry as just an animal costume fetish, but parts of this story make no sense unless you know about furry fiction

— Boxer Bunny (@BoxerBunny_) September 8, 2017

It's not sensible... There is a line between fantasy and reality. Rape in fantasy is not a crime and not comparable to the real thing.

— Just Khaz (@KhazWolf) September 8, 2017

This is NOT OKAY. It's sad this is what America has come to. Getting shamed for being unique. This is why I hate incompetent human beings!

— Sheptember Link! (@LinkThePup) September 9, 2017

Like the article? It takes a lot of effort to share these. Please consider supporting Dogpatch Press on Patreon, where you can access exclusive stuff for just $1.

Also from Silver Sprocket… The (human) star of Benji Nate’s web comic CatBoy says this about herself: “Hi, I’m Olive. My cat Henry is my best friend. I saw a shooting star and wished he could hang out with me like a person. I think I should have been more careful with my wording.” Now Silver Sprocket have assembled a 140-page trade paperback of CatBoy that includes the comics from Vice.com as well as unreleased new material and bonus artwork.

image c. 2017 Silver Sprocket

"Jumpy lives to jump!"
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Ask a Cat, by Charles Brubaker. Illustrated.
Martin, TN, Smallbug Press, June 2017, trade paperback $9.99 (127 pages).

The Fuzzy Princess, vol. 1, by Charles Brubaker. Illustrated.
Martin, TN, Smallbug Press, July 2017, trade paperback $10.99 (184 pages).

Charles Brubaker is a fan and expert of comic strips and Japanese TV anime. He has been drawing his own comics for several years. Both The Fuzzy Princess and Ask a Cat currently appear on the internet, the former in color and the latter in black-&-white. Now he is producing collections of them through his own Smallbug Press.

Brubaker says in his Introduction to Ask a Cat that it began as a minor throwaway panel within a comic strip about a little witch that he was preparing to submit to a syndicate. It was a parody of the “ask a character” fillers in other strips where readers can send in questions about the strip. Since Brubaker’s strip about the witch hadn’t come out yet, he filled the “ask” panel with a cat, and asked on a message board for silly questions about cats for him to answer. He got more questions about cats than he expected, and the syndicate liked his throwaway panel better than his strip about the witch. Ask a Cat began on June 22, 2015. The solicited message board questions were soon replaced by genuine questions submitted by his readers. Now, after two years, here is a collection of his panels.

Although Ask a Cat is designed as a weekly gag strip, many of the questions are semi-serious, such as “Why do you absolutely have to catch that mysterious red dot?” and “What’s in the box?” Others are nonsensical, like “What actually happened to Schrodinger’s cat?” and “Did you file your taxes this year?” Brubaker answers them all in the proper spirit of feline condescending arrogance. “Do you like vacuum cleaners?” “You’re kidding, right? Those tech-demons can go back to wherever they came from. The only acceptable vacuum cleaners are the Roombas. It’s basically a glorified cat lift, perfect for us lazy furballs. I should go on a road trip with this thing.”

The Fuzzy Princess (since October 17, 2016; published two or three times a week) presents the adventures on Earth of Princess Katrina of St. Paws, her royal escorts Chiro (a bat) and Kuma (a bear) who have been sent by her father to watch over her while on Earth, and those they meet there, mainly the young wizard Jackson (that’s Kat and Jackson on the cover of vol. 1), his sister Jordan, their human friends (Gladdie, Tara, Rick) and enemies (Bloated Whale and Max), and Krisa, a rat spy from Mousechester who is usually locked inside a birdcage.

The Fuzzy Princess (in black-&-white in this book) has a stronger story line than Ask a Cat. It is harder to tell who is weirder; Princess Kat and her bat and bear escorts, or the humans and Krisa. Kat and her companions come to Earth in a flying box (cats love boxes) that has her large interdimensional room inside it. Kat has a detachable tail that can be magically turned into anything. This vol. 1 has an introduction by Bill Holbrook of Kevin & Kell fame.

The best way to review a collection of gag-a-day cartoons is to just show them. If you like them, here are two whole books of them.

– Fred Patten

• Buy Ask a Cat on Amazon
• Buy The Fuzzy Princess Vol. 1 on Smallbug

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New documentary on Furries! (Also never check the comments on stuff like this as I'm sure the edge lords are out in force) Full Disclosure: We supplied the bambioid archive footage for this documentary.
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You’ll have to forgive your self-indulgent author, today. Every year, around this time, I get very maudlin. Part of it is the big change in my life around work that happened a while back, part of it is that lasting sense of “this is when the school year begins”, and part of it is grief.

In my Kaddish article these many years ago, I talk about the Mourner’s Kaddish, a prayer said after the death of one’s parents. It’s spoken daily for eleven months, and then yearly on the anniversary of the death. It’s said in order to ease the burden of grief over time so that it does not remain an overwhelming force in life.

Would that I had the faith to let go. Still, no harm in trying.

So, in that vein, on this anniversary, yit’gadal v’yit’kadash sh’mei raba…

Five years ago, on September 6th, a friend of mine passed away.

I’d not really had all that much exposure to death before that, if I’m honest. My step-adoptive-grandfather died when I was fairly young, and all I really remember out of that was the funeral, and inheriting a small medal he’d won from Colorado State University, something about soil science and geology. After that, I had dream after dream about what winning that medal must’ve been like, walking through some grand oaken hall to receive a pewter medal on a velvet pillow. That I later attended CSU, and that CSU had no oaken halls as in my dreams, always left me vaguely disappointed.

Other than that, my brush with mortality was limited to my grandmother, who passed some time later. The unfortunate part of her passing was that, for years before, she had been deep in a mire of dementia that left her a pallid shadow of her former self. From her, I remember that a lot of our final interactions were beset by confusion, frustration, and tears. “You’re [my mom]’s son, right?” she asked in the airport. She repeated the question seven or eight times, being sure, each time, to comfort herself that the person pushing her wheelchair was someone known to her.

My mom and I had flown out to see her as she got settled into a final stage of her life in Charlotte, North Carolina. My mom flew out to see her one more time before she died, but, after a long talk, it was decided that I would stay home. “I can’t handle it. I can’t be in that role again,” I pleaded, and my mom let me stay with my dad while she flew out of town.

Margaras died in an automobile accident on the base on which he was stationed. We, the group of friends that had congregated on FurryMUCK since long before I’d first appeared on the scene in 2001, learned about this from a close friend of his five years ago today, as I write this on September 12th. The friend slipped quietly into the room, confirmed that Margs had been a regular there, passed along the news through an article, and then slipped just as quietly from the room.

We all sat basically dumbfounded.

The news came the day before I was scheduled to fly to Canada, to Montreal. I had just started my job at Canonical the week before along with another coworker, and the team had decided that the best way to onboard us new folk was to schedule a week of us working together with a few previously defined goals.

My attention was divided that whole week. It was only my second week at work, and yet I felt as though I was dealing with a death in the family. I think all of us there on FM were going through something similar, to some extent or another. Some rejoiced in memories, some were crushed. I felt torn – Margs had been there as I was growing up. All through high school, through college, and into my first job.

Most of all, I remembered all of the times, upon performing “I’ve got a gal in Kalamazoo” during my senior year of high school, that I sang to him about “knowing a lynx in Kalamazoo”, where he’d lived. I couldn’t get that silly song out of my head for days after learning of his passing. He grumbled every time I quoted that to him, too – he was always a grouchy lynx.

He didn’t even live in Michigan anymore. Hadn’t in years.

I made it through the week okay. I think all of us found our ways to cope, and for me, that was in solidarity. I left myself logged in to FurryMUCK in a terminal on my laptop even as I worked, peeking back every now and then to see little tendrils of normalcy creeping back into the lives of those impacted by the loss. When I went to sleep, I left myself logged in so that I could wake up to a few hours of chatter before I had been disconnected for inactivity.

Me and a few others, some of whom also grew up knowing the grouchy lynx, still remember those days with a sort of clarity that eludes other, seemingly important moments in life. Every year, a few waves of memory wash through my days, carrying along bits of detritus. Memories of my first few days at Canonical, falling in love all over again with people, leaving a screen session running with the MUCK connected to wake up to.

When our lynx friend passed five years ago, I was left wondering what he’d say to me. I think this is a fairly common thought among those who have lost someone close to them. “Would I be making them proud?” “Would they tell me off for the bad decisions that I’ve made?” “Did they leave this world having a good impression of me?”

If Margaras were alive today, what would he say to me? When he left, I was just on my way out of a bout of self destruction – would he be proud that I had pulled through that, and several others in the intervening years? When he left, I was still figuring out some very basic aspects of myself: my gender identity and the whole open relationship thing – would he understand all of my halting forays into these territories, the backtracking and endless refining? Would that all become part of the story that we’d laugh about after the fact? Would we still laugh about knowing a lynx in Kalamazoo? What words of ours would we remember best?

I’ll never know, obviously.

I’ve been thinking about that a lot, this time around the sun. What words did we share that made it so that I felt so strongly about his passing? We never met in person, so words were about all we had between us, maybe the occasional *hug* or something to go with it it, but other than that, we were friends through the letters that showed up on each other’s screens.

The more I thought about this, the more I realized that this is very much the norm within furry. I found myself thinking about the sheer number of people that I know primarily, or even only through words. Words that we have the chance to edit, words that we pick carefully. This is the face we present to each other, more than just a drawing or two of our character. Its relatively rare, in fact, that the image is what we know, more than the words: I can think of only a handful of examples of people that I know primarily through their likeness rather than through their words, and in almost every case, I am totally unknown to them – it’s a purely unidirectional relationship.

Our words, though, is how we truly know each other. It’s one of those things that sounds stupidly obvious when set down plainly like that, but all the same, I’ve been spending some time going over my words and thinking, “Who is it that the people around me know? Am I being earnest, am I constructing an artificial personality, or is it a bit of both?”

I know that I’ve said some stupid things in my life, and there is a part of me that regrets saying them. I’ve yelled when I shouldn’t have, and I’ve not spoken up enough when I should have. I’ve wound up in relationships and friendships that weren’t very healthy for me or for the other person, and I’ve left relationships that were truly good for me for reasons I still don’t understand to this day. I regret them, yes, but I can’t help but ask myself what I would be without them? Would I have matured into someone I would like to be friends with? Would I have matured at all, if I hadn’t, at some points in my life, done the wrong thing and actually made that mistake, felt the hot flush of shame?

Brené Brown talks about much of this in her 2012 talk at TED. She describes having a “vulnerability hangover” after admitting to a large audience that she had a breakdown, and goes on to describe the fact that vulnerability is essential to our lives. I think it’s fairly obvious that I agree, given the tone of this article.

More than that, however, Brown talks about how important it is that we have a conversation about shame. “Shame”, she says, “is not guilt. Shame is a focus on self, guilt is a focus on behavior. Shame is “I am bad.” Guilt is “I did something bad.””

There are things that I am ashamed about with my friendship with Margaras. I didn’t talk to him enough, foremost. I didn’t reach out to him more, and when he was around, I too often was comfortable not engaging more fully. I probably also could’ve done without making that dumb Kalamazoo joke quite as many times as I did, too.

But again, I have to question what I would be feeling now without that shame. Would my pain have lingered for five years now if I had only perfect interactions with him? Would I miss him so deeply if there were no words left unsaid between us? Would I feel so glad about the time we spent together if I hadn’t also gone through rough times while knowing him, and hadn’t needed the comfort of a friend?

Now that I know the feeling of loss – how it tastes, how it aches, the weight of it – I think I better understand the way that my own words work, and the importance of shame to me. I have better control over the way that I interact with others, because I’ve gone through the process of learning how (and how not to). This has changed the way I use words, those most important things within the furry subculture, whether that be on twitter or here through [a][s], talking with friends on Slack or even chatting in person.

I’ll still make mistakes, of course, but I’ll feel better about them. Hopefully they won’t be so deeply stupid, and I’ll have a little less to be ashamed of as time goes on. I’ll feel guilt about the dumb thing that I did, but maybe a bit less shame about myself. Even so, I’ll still have reasons to feel strongly about the ways I interact with people through the words I choose. Maturation’s a hell of a task to undertake, but coming out through the other side, it feels much better.

So. To Margaras. To grouchy lynxes. To shame, to mistakes, and to maturity. And hey, until next time,

A-B-C-D-E-F-G-H-I knew a lynx in Kalamazoo…

Everything’s O.K-A-L-A-M-A-Z-O-Oh what a lynx in Kalamazoo-zoo-zoo-zoo-zoo-zoo”