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Dear Papa Bear,

So me and my ex-mate broke up just over a month ago. It was very complicated, but he said we could still be best friends and keep visiting each other, hanging out and everything. I thought that would be okay, he's a great guy and I'd be okay just being friends with him. At first it was going pretty good, I went to visit him once a week as usual and we'd hang out and everything. But all of a sudden he's just sort of stopped talking to me.

The last time I saw him was last month and since then we've been arranging dates for me to visit only for him to cancel at the last minute. The one that hurt the most though was when we set a date for me to visit, only for him to cancel in favor of hanging out with another friend, which made me feel very unwanted.

These days he won't respond to my texts and rarely responds to my Skype messages, which is our main way of contacting each other. He's been saying that he'll arrange a date for us to see a movie together. It's a remake of a movie we both watched and loved when we were going out. But he's been cancelling on that too. Every time the date we set comes around he always has an excuse for why we need to rearrange it. I wouldn't mind if he cancelled a couple of times, but this has been happening for weeks. I'm starting to wonder if he actually still wants to be friends or if he's just saying these things because he either doesn't want to hurt my feelings or just wants me to stop bugging him about it.

I really don't know what to do. I've been told by friends and family that I should forget him, or warn him that if he keeps cancelling then I'll stop being his friend, but I don't want to upset him. He's got a lot of stuff going on in his life right now and I don't want to add more stress by getting angry and upset with him. I haven't told him how upset this is making me for that reason. What do you think I should do?

D-Foxeh

* * *

Hi, D-Foxeh,

There are several things that could be happening here with your ex:

1. He’s changed his mind about being best friends and is feeding you false promises in the hope that you’ll eventually give up trying and leave him alone.

2. He’s got a new boyfriend (possibly the other friend you mention), and even though he’d like to see you, his new relationship is making it awkward so he keeps cancelling on you.

3. He’s got a new boyfriend and has completely lost interest in you.

4. He still has feelings for you, and he got scared that hanging out with you so much might make him want to be your boyfriend again, and he is fearful of going back down a road that led to a breakup last time.

5. He’s just an inconsiderate, self-involved jerk and blows you off because he’s a jackass and he’s full of crap.

6. There is something terribly wrong going on in his life—like, disastrously wrong—and he doesn’t want to bring you into the equation since you are no longer his boyfriend.

None of these reasons is very favorable to you. All of them indicate, for one reason or another, that this is the end of the end. It would have been nice if you could have remained friends, but he’s sending you a not-too-subtle (and cowardly) signal that he is done with you.

Getting “angry or upset” with him will certainly not rectify the situation; indeed, it would likely destroy any last chance you might have with him as a friend. At this point, if I were you, I wouldn’t give a damn about his stress. He had a friend in you, someone who could have been there for him if he was in trouble, but he has chosen to shut the door in your face. Number 6 above would be about the only case where I might sympathize with him a bit, but I rather doubt it is a possibility here. Although he has “a lot of stuff going on in his life right now” that might be stressful, judging by your letter he is not facing a critical problem.

The best thing for you to do is back off. Let him contact you. If he never contacts you, then you certainly have an answer about how much he cares about you. On the other paw, if he does contact you, you will have found a strategy that works when you want to talk to him.

Yours is not the first letter of this kind that has popped into my inbox. It’s always the same, and people don’t seem ready to admit to themselves that the person they want to contact them simply is no longer interested. It hurts, indeed, and it is not a very decent way to treat people, but that is how many people behave when they don’t want to deal with a situation or with a person: they simply ignore it and hope it will go away.

Good luck to you,

Papabear

Author: E-Mail Hidden This week on Knotcast, Savrin Shiva and Fuzz tackle the ever present pile of emails. We hear about creepers, discuss the fucked up week on the USA, and get some follow ups in the process. This weeks song is “Define Me” by Rayan Amador Use our coupon code ‘knot’ at Adameve.com for [...] KnotCast: Episode 216 – Email Tsunami

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This week on Knotcast, Savrin Shiva and Fuzz tackle the ever present pile of emails. We hear about creepers, discuss the fucked up week on the USA, and get some follow ups in the process. This weeks song is "Define Me" by Rayan Amador http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HyNSGff-Nh4 http://ryanamador.bandcamp.com/ Use our coupon code 'knot' at Adameve.com for a great deal! Episode 216 - Email Tsunami

Alright, I hope this is enough information to make an avatar. I am a red fox, I love gaming, and I have glasses. I'm a guy. Thanks a bunch to whoever makes me an avatar!

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Relating to a fetish or a subcategory of that fetish (ie. Hard Vore, Soft Vore, Cock/Anal Vore, cooking, absorption, etc.)

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I'm jingling my bell.

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For a limited time only:

For a while I will be offering flat colour, full body images of your character/s (anthro or feral) for only $20 AUD ea. I will be submitting these as a group so there won’t be any option for a background. These are perfect for those who don’t have references of their character yet or are after something from me but don’t quite have the funds. I'm also willing to do more mature/NSFW poses and images that will be posted separately on the appropriate FA account. When the offer will end depends on the response. If not many people are interested I’ll drag it out a bit, if it’s overly popular I’ll stop it before I get overrun.

If you’re keen please do the following before contacting me:

Read my Terms of Service here: http://silvixen.livejournal.com/6037.html

Have a reference or VERY detailed description about your character ready (I will not make a thousand changes because your description lacks information, especially working for this price. Please consider the exact location and extent of markings, pull up examples of your preferred colours and clothes or any other characters that have a similar appearance to what you’re looking for.) Things to consider: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/5905833/

The exact poses and expressions you’d like me to give your character/s (examples are also very welcome here).

Consider that if this is a popular offer that there will be a wait before I get to yours if you’re not first in line. You must be ready to make payment the moment I’m ready for you, if you’re not you’ll be put to the back of the line. I will not ask for payment before I’m ready to draw your character so that if something happens that prevents me from getting through all of them there’s no loss to you. I’ll make a list once this begins so you have some idea of where you sit and what order I’ll get to you.

Please contact me via note on Furaffinity, DeviantART or email me at: silvixen.artist@gmail.com

Examples of my artwork can be found on my FA which contains links to all my other accounts as well.

Note: This offer will be advertised on FA, DA and Reddit - r/furry.

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And I need some people to test it out! The game is called Fox Dash (Two) and is an action platformer (on Android) where you play as a fox searching the world to find his lost mate.

Screenshots

If you have an Android and want to help me out, please comment below or PM me and I'll get some builds setup.

Those without an Android and still want to help, most certainly can! I also need some people to test out the HTML5 level editor. Again, comment or PM me.

I am currently running a Kickstarter too if anyone is interested!

Other neat facts.

• The engine used in the game is coded from scratch and is open source.
• My team consists of 8 people, 5 are furry!
• There is a website and a Twitter!

Thanks for looking!

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