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So after trial and error and me being picky on my Fursona, I decided on the fursona that fit me just fine. Meet Allister.
FC-132 Radioactive Bodily Fluids
He's Having a Hard Time Keeping Friends
Hello again. So my question this time is how do you make friends and then meaningful, lasting friendships?
I ask because I typically seem incapable of getting close enough to people to go from an acquaintance to a friend and never seem to become close friends with said friends. That covers the meaningful part, as for the lasting part. I rarely have lasting friends because either we drift apart and lose contact or I unintentionally hurt them and wind up being hated by them.
And I know the standard way is to simply talk to people and get to know them, but I'm a terrible conversationalist and any talks seem to be superficial if they don't just die outright. And I understand the concept of practicing to get better, but I've been trying for years to no avail in that regard.
Sincerely,
Thief
* * *
Hi, again, Thief,
Have you read Dale Carnegie's famous book, How to Win Friends and Influence People?
Papabear
* * *
No I have not, but if I go by the reviews it seems to be less about making friends and more about just getting people to like you to succeed career-wise. I'm more than capable of getting people to like me, at least it's easier in person as opposed to online, but I just can't connect with them to form friendships. Or am I wrong about my assumption of the book?
Thief
* * *
Hi,
Well, the book is mostly about getting along with people, not being nervous meeting them, how to get them to like you and so forth. Most of it is common sense. Papabear used to be very shy, too, and here is what I learned about getting to know people and make friends:
- Ask lots of questions of the other person and get to know him or her. Be interested in their life, care about what they say because the things they talk about are very important to them and if they see you feel their lives are important, too, they will quickly come to like you.
- Talk less, listen more.
- Be a friend, which means helping the other person if they need some help. Being there for them. But be careful: this should work both ways in a true friendship, otherwise it becomes a user/used relationship.
That's pretty much it. If you do those three things, you will make friends.
Hugs,
Papabear
* * *
This is good, sound advice. Thank you. However, unfortunately that is what I do. But I don't seem to connect enough with others to transition from acquaintance to friend.
Thief
* * *
Hi, Thief,
Forgive me if I asked you this already in one of your other letters, but do you suffer from Aspergers or any other social anxiety disorder?
Papabear
* * *
Dear Papa Bear,
You have not asked me that. Though, I have never been diagnosed with any social anxiety disorder, Asperger's or Autism, etc. Granted just because I have not been diagnosed with it does not mean I don't have one I suppose.
Thief
* * *
Well, it might be worth looking into. It could just be, too, that you are meeting the wrong people in the wrong place. A quality friendship starts with two quality people. Even if you do all the right things, if you're meeting people who aren't good friend material, you're going to strike out.
But one way that two people can become close friends is to go through some kind of trial together in which they have to combine forces to overcome an obstacle. This is rather a cliche, actually, that you often see in hokey movies, but it can be true in real life. Not suggestion you create an artificial crisis and drag someone into it to make them your friend, but that is one way it happens.
Mostly, though, you need to find people with whom you have something (or things) in common. Not just a hobby, but something really important or bonding, like a similar experience in life or a passion for a cause or a skill.
And that's about all the advice I have on that topic. Being nice to other people has always worked for me.
Good luck!
Papabear
![Finally stopped lurking because of my friend, she drew this for me [KaiCreature]](http://f.thumbs.redditmedia.com/MW8RoW0lF74Zs7-S.jpg "Finally stopped lurking because of my friend, she drew this for me [KaiCreature]")
Rabbit Valley reveals new digital items, Dragon’s Hoard titles
Dust: an elysian tail [Steam 50% off]
Since the link was already submitted earlier I just have to do it like this:
http://store.steampowered.com/app/236090/
Have fun playing it!
submitted by NoctisIgnem[link] [18 comments]
A Couple of Days Ago I Posted Asking for Your Fursona for a Writing Experiement...I Was Asked for More Details and so Here They Are
Utlimately, my goal is to build a living, breathing world. Not by writing a bunch of 500 page books, but rather by building it almost blog like in a way. There will be larger articles that go into an event, shorter articles on different characters within the world, a bit on their history and their role within the world, and then shorter articles yet as newspapers that will come out once a month, and will get into events in, as of now, 6 plot lines running in tandem. Eventually those shorter articles will become longer and longer thus the sort of living world idea.
This will be run as a website, which will be free to read through. I plan to make no money on this, unless someone really wants to throw a donation or two at me. All the artwork that will be available will be paid for by myself (I have an artist who has done work for Marvel and a number of other comic book companies who will be doing the artwork). All the bandwidth, the hosting, the design, everything will be paid for by me.
Now, as for a bit of backstory: I am going to give you the Reader's Digest version of the beginnings of the world:
Two gods were created with the soul purpose of creating a new world. They were given the ability to visit any world in existence, and continue to have that ability despite being living beings in the world (No sky fairy here, as r/atheism might say). They travelled to hundreds of worlds, some developing, some developed, and found a deep fascination with humans, despite the fact that at the time we were crawling out of caves and just figuring out that if you stick a sharp rock on a stick you could kill something quicker with it. They saw great promise in humans, but they saw a fault: The animals around us had more strength in some ways than humans had. Thus, they combined the two, the abilities of humans with the strength of animals and the first paws walked upon the land.
The gods continued to monitor humans checking on their progress for thousands upon thousands of years. They watched the myths form, they watched the human's gods come and go. One set of myths most intrigued these two gods, and that was those of dragons, gryphons, the great beasts. Now, at this time, there was no way for long distance travel on the Crystal Islands, nor was there a great need for it as at the time the land was small and the residents were not a huge number so as to not over-burden the land. The gods brought dragons into existence, though on a smaller scale then the myths talked about, and with that gave more land to the residents, and the residents began to spread apart.
The gods then, as they began to expand the world, began to look over the Earth's many varied regions, from the deserts, to the great jungles, and began to replicate some of those as they expanded. They avoided the extremes as they did not feel it fair to have their creations end up in the frigid cold of Antarctica, nor the extreme heat of the great deserts. Thus, the population grew, and set up homes in many regions. The gods also, around this time, decided to give magic to their people. Not what Pagans practice, but magic as it was in the tales. One child was born with innate magical ability, and grew with an innate ability to teach that ability, and thus the first of the two schools was created: The massive magic school which sits upon it's very own island and takes up 30-40 acres of land.
And there I end this tale. I have given enough backstory to explain a bit about the world, yet I leave out the juicy events that occur between these events, and after these events. I have what would be the equivalent of 4 500 page novels worth of stories for this world, and the process of taking them from the notebooks, and bringing them digital is a slow one, slowed down by having to work as well. It is also a great feeling to bring them to a form that can be saved away safely. The process of building the backend to support such an idea is also a slow one, but it too is making process. TLDR: Read it.
submitted by brianbommarito[link] [18 comments]
Help with fursona
Hello! :3 I need some help redesignig my fursona, the current one is a mix of wolf and husky, but I dont know, it doesnt look that nice, I made it some years ago and I think his colors are too dark for my preferences, so I been thinking about making a new one, I think something feline would fit me better, so I am thinking about making a canadian linx fursona, except that I would like something which has bright colors (something white... maybe a few stripes but mostly white) and with sapphire colored ear or hair (http://www.colorcodehex.com/0f52ba/), just that I dont know if that will look right, a canadian linx with blue ear (hair), or maybe someone has a better idea or something which would look better ;).
Sorry for my bad english
[link] [6 comments]
Making a furrsona for my boyfriend. Need some ideas!
My boyfriend agreed to let me make him a furrsona and dress him. I have a few ideas of what I could do but I would love some other ideas.
His favorite colors are blue, black, green, and white. I was thinking of a fluffy cat or fox because he loves cats. There has to be a long/longish fluffy tail, fluffy ears and a color with a bell on it(bell could be optional in some cases).
I'm really existed he's letting me do this and I want it to be perfect and what other way to get that than to ask for help.
Help would be very much so appreciated!!!
EDIT: It's not a fursona! it's just a furry look for him to try out and see how he like being furry. I just put the first thing that came to mind and it was fursona. But I still want to make it as much like him as possible.
submitted by Dlanly[link] [7 comments]
![[link]](http://i.imgur.com/ZoOWhzA.jpg){kind=link}