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submitted by Tes1a
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Hey there, Papabear!

First, just want to say how thankful and grateful I am for your column. It’s such a joy to read all the help you've given to furs of every sort, and watch as they grow with many letters and wonderful advice.

So now its my turn to ask. 

I am a 19 year old college kid from the south. I'm what you call a workaholic.... I strive for 4.0 grades and spend long hours anxiously fretting about my chores, my job in the reptile house at my local zoo, my pets, my friends, my family ... anything you can imagine. I attended counseling for a short time after I suffered a bit of an anxious break caused by a really unwanted sexual encounter with a boy I was dating a while before. I am also religious (but no worries, no close mindedness here! All humans deserve to have agency in their lives). I'm also very logical, so it didn’t take long for me to address that what happened wasn’t my fault, I made it out still a virgin, and I happily continued on my way. My friends all address me as "the sane one", as I always think things through before reacting, and have helped a lot of people in grief. 

So that’s why this situation is so strange.

I ended up taking up a hobby to fill some time (time I later wouldn’t have. Whoops! Overloaded class schedule!) And turned up meeting this fantastic man in the hobby, and we started dating after a year of being friends. We moved very fast. Emotionally, a bit physically (however, he very much respects my desire to wait till marriage for sex). We simply clicked so well, despite coming from very different lives and backgrounds, and to this moment I can see myself staying with him forever. we've never really had a fight, though I've certainly given him plenty of reason. His love, patience, and mind are unmatched. He is simply a God among men. 

But my worries get in the way. I soon found out via my sister (cute sweet girl she is) that he was planning to propose to me. Now, I already knew this, as we'd discussed it. But suddenly, now that I knew the day exactly, I was terrified. All the concerns that I'd pushed back in my head suddenly ran to the front. "Where are we going to live?" "How will I focus in school?" "How will we resist the temptations a year of being engaged would bring (as we agreed to wait a year to get married so my school would be in a more solid place... to his reluctance)" "We're both sickly people, what happens if I get sick and can't support him?". 

I knew then I wasn’t ready. I didn’t love him any less, or have any malicious thought or even concern about our relationship. Not to mention my parents and family (who are very important to me) barely knew him, and I wanted them to have a chance to understand him too.

So I sat him down. We talked for four hours straight. I had planned for it to be very simple, to declare my love but explain that I just wasn’t ready yet. Engagement is very very serious to me... I didn’t want to just waltz in naively and take his love, affection, and sacrifice for granted. 

But the words didn’t come out right. 

Eventually I got my point across, but it was like putting glass figures on a shelf. They got there, but... not in tact.

Its been a few days since, and its been a tad difficult. He is hurt, disappointed. And who could blame him? We still have a lot of fun together. When we're with each other, as he says, "all the worries go away", and its so true. Weird and illogical, but true. But, there’s still this underlying uncomfortable vibe I get from him. I can feel that he has doubts in our relationship. He said to take all the time I need to be ready, but he doesn’t really see what "ready" would require. And I cant find a way to explain it in a way that makes sense, cause it doesn’t make sense to me either!

I love this man, I know I do. I could never match the sacrifices and love he has given me. But I desperately want to try. I want to do this right, and make sure we are ready to brave the future together. But concerns... school exams, Work, family illness issues, and then fears of the future are preventing me from giving my all right now. I know I can solve my worries, I've done it before and will find the means.

But... what can I do for his worries? Nothing I say seems to fix what I broke, whatever it is I broke. We're still so happy, but some of the things he says have these worrisome undertones. I keep telling him there’s nothing to worry about, but he doesn’t believe me. I've never felt like such a kid in my life, or felt so dramatic. I feel like a teenage girl actually! Its weird!

What can I do Papa Bear? How can I assure him everything is going to be ok? I know all couples have issues, but I always thought it would be... different. We are having the problem that we love each other too much. It's completely and utterly insane in a good way. I just want to find a way to express the love I so honestly and humbly feel for him. But it seems almost hopeless until I can solve my own anxieties ... and even then, what if he doesn’t believe I've solved them? 

Thanks Papa, you're the best
-Krogan-ish (age 19)

* * *

Dear Krogan-ish,

Wow, you are doing so much right with your life! You work and study hard, have a job that yours truly is envious of (I once applied for a zoo job, but was the runner-up because I lost to a woman with a master’s degree in zoology), have your spiritual life together while being non-judgmental of those who follow a different path, and found a great guy who is not an LDR. Bravo!

The one little glitch in your life is the result of your Type A personality. You’re nervous about the idea of getting engaged and married because of all the unknown factors that introduces. You want to be certain that, if there is a crisis, such as one of you losing a job, you will be safe and secure. You and I both know, don’t we, that nothing is every 100% safe and secure?

Regarding your conversation with your boyfriend. I’m guessing that you basically said you don’t want to be married right now and, after perhaps giving him some reasons, left it at that. Now he’s left wondering if his love for you is going anywhere, or if it is just going to continue as it is. While that’s not bad, he wants something more and, I bet, in the back of his mind is wondering if you think he’s good enough for you and whether you’re waiting to see if someone better comes along. Not that you are! But that’s how people can think in these cases.

So, here’s what you do. First, decide whether you really do wish to get married—even if that is way down the road. If you do (and I have a feeling you do, since you say you love him), write down what it would take for you to feel comfortable enough to get married. Would it mean not before finishing school? Would it mean that both of you would need stable jobs? Would it mean having a certain amount of money in savings first? Whatever it is, write those down as your goals.

Now, sit down with your boyfriend and talk about your goals in life. Your Type A personality likes to plan (yes?) because that makes you feel like you are on solid ground and will ease your insecurities. Tell him that you feel insecure about getting married now because of reasons 1, 2, and 3. So, make a plan you can both agree on and discuss milestones you wish to achieve along the way toward those goals. The prize at the end is engagement and, finally, marriage.

You then have something in place that helps both of you: it eases your insecurities about the what-ifs, and it reassures your boyfriend that the relationship is going somewhere.

Hope that is helpful to you! Good luck!

Hugs,

Papabear

Hello and welcome to this week's Writing Prompt Wednesday!

This time the theme is to write an emotional story. Make us cry!

As always, stories can be a maximum of 5 comments long, if you need to write more than 5 comments leave a link to an external site after your 5th reply. If you can fit it in under 5 comments, it's preferred that you just put it here. No erotica, swearing is fine.

Remember to leave suggestions for future Writing Prompt Wednesdays in the future, leave your suggestions as seperate comments!

Get to writing!

submitted by NewFurryIGuess
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submitted by dracomagica
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submitted by ArcaneTheWoof
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Here we have a decent short furry documentary feturing Rika Keener, AKA Rika Fox Pawzer.

submitted by AntarcticFox
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Technofox
Novel by Nathan Cowan
Self-published on Fur Affinity
Warning: Explicit (NSFW links)

Nathan Cowan has written four novels and two short stories about the adventures of the Foxforce Four, an all-female, all-vulpine paramilitary team consisting of the leader, Firefox; the computer-whiz, Technofox; the soldier, Silverfox; and the spy, Shadowfox. On the surface, the Foxforce stories are classic pulp action tales—with liberal doses of erotica sprinkled in. But this first impression quickly gives way to a surprisingly deep saga, with ethical ponderings on the relation between creator and creation and an imaginative, biopunk setting created with a scientist’s attention to detail.

Technofox, the second novel in the series, makes a far better introduction to the Foxforce universe than the first novel, Firefox. Firefox takes the standard BDSM erotica plot and deconstructs it, but the novel is so steeped in the trappings of the genre–with whips, chains, and collars on almost every page–that it severely limits its appeal to a general audience. Technofox still has its whips and chains, but uses them to inform the main character’s story arc rather than be the main focus of the story.

Each of the Foxforce novels has been a deconstruction of a different genre. Firefox is a deliberate spin on the babes-behind-bars lesbian erotica genre, and the third novel, Silverfox, is a guns-blazing action story with homages to Richard Connell’s “The Most Dangerous Game.”

Technofox, on the other hand, resists easy classification at first. The story opens with Foxforce investigating a mysterious assassin known only as “7.62,” named after the distinctive ammo he uses. 7.62’s most recent target was an activist for chimera rights, chimerae like those in the Foxforce Four. Following a lead on 7.62’s identity, the team travels to Atlanta, but Firefox has an ulterior motive for the trip: also in Atlanta is Travis Walton, a human geneticist responsible for designing chimerae, who tormented and raped Firefox during the events of the first novel. Firefox wants revenge and asks for Technofox’s help in killing him. From here, the gears of intrigue start to turn.

It’s not until halfway through the novel that Technofox reveals it has been a murder mystery all along. Cowan spends the first half of the novel interweaving the investigation into 7.62’s identity, the planning of Walton’s murder, and the blossoming of Technofox’s sexual desires and her relationship with Firefox; then he deftly shifts the perspective of the story. Characters and events that initially hampered and distracted Foxforce’s plans become a list of suspects and clues. While this is all going on, the story keeps a strong focus on Technofox’s journey of self-discovery and on the fluid landscape of relationships between chimerae and humans which drive almost all the major events. Even the revelation of the murderer’s identity (normally the climax of such a mystery) is relegated to an epilog.

Throughout all the novels, Cowan seems to be at his most comfortable when world-building. He starts with his base premises—what if this really happened, and wasn’t just a cliché?—and then builds his world up around those ideas brick by brick, leading the reader through each logical connection until they are forced to agree with his grim conclusions.

For Firefox, Cowan designed the Blue Diamond slave brothel and its frightening overlords to reimagine BDSM clichés, but he never travels outside of that one place in the novel. Technofox takes place six months after Foxforce’s escape from the brothel; here Cowan’s world-building takes flight. Having designed Blue Diamond for Firefox, Cowan then deconstructs his own creation to explain what sort of Earth could give rise to such a horrible place.

The results are starkly dystopian. Criminal syndicates are everywhere. Corporations hire their own mercenaries (such as Foxforce themselves). World War II was fought to a stalemate and the Nazis are still a force to be reckoned with. The American Civil War never happened. The free-state/slave-state dichotomy persists into the present day. This last element presents unique challenges for the chimerae of the Foxforce Four, who are considered self-owning in Massachusetts, but must be legally owned by a human when they travel to Georgia.

This bleak world is further reinforced by Foxforce’s abilities. In true pulp action style, the Foxforce Four are all incredibly skillful individuals, quite at home taking down the bad guys with a well-timed headshot. But at the same time, they’re running with limited resources, low personal funds, and laws that hem them in from all sides. There’s never a sense that they are saving the world, just patching it up. They aren’t a team full of James Bonds: they are just four more hands desperately trying to keep the leaky dam from bursting.

The juxtaposition of all these elements almost comes across as a farce: a character named (of all things) Technofox works as a corporate mercenary, fights nazis, and secretly has a kinky lesbian love affair with her team commander? But Cowan plays it all so perfectly straight and serious that it is hard not to be sucked into the drama. He even makes the oddities into one more thing to be explained: if Technofox has to be her official name, then she, like anyone would in her position, just goes by the much less cumbersome and prosaic nickname “Tech.”

Fans of Isaac Asimov will find a lot to like in Technofox, as Cowan’s style is similar. Like Asimov, Cowan tends to write high-dialogue, low-description, and many scenes feature characters arguing over their work with the precision of practiced professionals. This is both one of Cowan’s best assets and one of his greatest detriments. If you are the type of analytical reader who wants to walk through each new concept in detail, Cowan is happy to oblige; otherwise you may feel as though you are watching an episode of CSI where they forgot to use a montage to skip past all the laboratory work. The lack of descriptive details also means that secondary characters blend into a fog of indeterminate forms, all with the same shape, voice, and motivations. Even the primary characters are hard to distinguish by their dialogue alone, although this improves considerably in the later books.

My complaints, however, are few. I consider Technofox to be one of the finest furry books I have read, enjoyable on many different levels: an enjoyable mystery in its own right that’s worth at least two read-throughs to catch all the subtle clues, an intriguing setting that makes us confront the downsides to an anthropomorphic world, thrilling action scenes, and more than a few moments of kinky erotica.

submitted by CarnivalOfPain
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submitted by adomb
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submitted by HSB_ColdSnap
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submitted by Lolanthe
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Zoo City, by Lauren Beukes Johannesburg, Jacana Media, June 2010, trade paperback R150,00 (344 pages). Okay, I have a thing for listing books by their original editions, but I can’t really expect anyone (except Rakuen Grolithe) to order this from South Africa. The international edition (383 pages) was published by Osprey Publishing/Angry Robot in Botley, […]

Maybe I should put a [Serious] tag here too.

It seems that every time I mention furries, someone says "oh yeah the guys who fuck in those suits, gross, get the fuck outta here perv". But what is the real ratio with people who just love to dress up as their characters opposed to people who actually perform adult acts in suits?

And is it different in Europe compared to rest of the world (USA)?

My educated guess would be somewhere in 1-3% ballpark. I hope it's lower. Tried finding some research but couldn't find none. Of probably 200 furries, I know exactly two people who have engaged in such behavior (and thus are not welcome with their suits to any public stuff and/or my place.) Others either don't tell, have a separate murrsuit or just plainly don't do it.

Any thoughts?

submitted by liskoturri
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I'm a novice fursuit builder in the making about to start work on another head for the holiday season and with a bigger budget. As such, I have very little experience with finding locations to buy materials from. The only fur I could find on Amazon was 2" pile (way too long and needed excessive shaving) and pretty pricey. Any craft stores/websites you guys know of that has shorter-pile fur?

submitted by SnippyTheDeliveryFox
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Author: Hi Papabear,I am writing because I am a furry with serious social anxiety and a burning desire to meet other Furries.My whole life most people have rejected me for the littlest things, like I am, to use their words, “the 7th grade Einstein.” I like Pokemon, I am horrible at sports, nor do I […]

submitted by cuddlypants
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submitted by Warloxwill
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