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The Ursa Major Awards are an annual feature of furry fandom’s favorite media. Right now anything made in 2024 is eligible, and anyone can choose what deserves recognition.

GO HERE TO NOMINATE NOW. Time runs out at the end of February 28 so DON’T WAIT.

The Recommended Anthropomorphics List is a helpful guide for many options, but you don’t have to only pick from the list. The list is open for anyone to submit during the year, making a great way to discover things you overlooked or submit things you want to get seen.

PLEASE CONSIDER NOMINATING THE PODCAST: FUR AND LOATHING. This investigation into the 2014 attack on Midwest Furfest features reporting by Dogpatch Press, with a production team led by journalist Nicky Woolf. The series was an intense labor of love including a productive FOIA request for FBI documents, and travel to 4 states to interview numerous sources, bringing exclusive answers about the fandom’s biggest cold case crime. Nominate it under “Anthropomorphic Miscellany.” “Miscellany category has insufficient entries to make it worthwhile”; please nominate it under Non-Fiction.

Consider donating via paypal@ursamajorawards.org to support this service. It’s a connection to roots of fandom with a committee of old-guard fans; and a way to promote and connect with creators on the tides of social media, where it takes so much work to be noticed.

Like the article? These take hard work. For more free furry news, follow on Twitter or support not-for-profit Dogpatch Press on Patreon. Want to get involved? Try these subreddits: r/furrydiscuss for news or r/waginheaven for the best of the community. Or send guest writing here. (Content Policy.)

Welcome to Kacey Pink, a trans lesbian writer of adult stories about transbodies and people overcoming adversity, trauma, and love finding a way. You can check out her novels here: pinkkacey.itch.io. Thanks to Kacey for her guest review of “a thoughtful story about love overcoming the programming of self hate”. The work of Rukis can be found here.

Spoiler Free HeartTheft Review

Rukis’s HeartTheft is two books: Covenant and Apocrypha, however when I heard about an 800 page hard cover of both books combined I felt an overwhelming urge to pick it up for myself. I am not terribly versed in Rukis’s work, besides having read one of the Red Lantern comics and having ogled their art for as long as I’ve considered myself “in the fandom”. However, this stands out to me as a very strong novel in its own right. My desire to grab up the book was solely because I knew that if it fell from a high shelf it might break a toe or two. I would like to see more of these long form books, unashamed to be dense and worthy of analysis as HeartTheft is. Did the story of HeartTheft require 806 pages to be effectively told? I am not confident in that. Am I endlessly grateful, however, that we get to spend so much time in this world and with these well constructed and lived in characters.

If part of your experience growing up was learning how you were lied to by people who wanted “better for you”, you’ll probably enjoy this book. If you can relate to a story about religious deconstruction that doesn’t condemn belief and earnestly tackles the pain and suffering organized religion has brought onto people, oftentimes those that are forced by the abuse they’ve suffered to cling to it, this is a good book for you. If you are fond of thought out world building and well measured applications of stakes and tension, this is a good book for you. If you are a fan of gender go third, sex go [redacted], you’ll probably also enjoy this.

Mystery and investigation don’t take a back seat, but the core of this novel is finding answers for yourself about what you believe in. Even if, but especially if, that’s hard to accept.

Family and love face long odds, but fighting for what’s right, fighting for who is right for you, is the only answer.

I prefer to give things # out of 5 scores based on how well they met my personal expectations. It’s all about if I feel they could be improved in some way, and not scoring them in a comparison of pieces to one another. As a result:

I have come to a 4.5 out of 5 for HeartTheft.

There is room for improvement in my opinion, the opening of the book doesn’t move as quick as I’d like, but overall the story is rather strong and the theme and character work is moving. Expect characters having to learn to believe in love. Yearning and learning. This is not a smut book for the hornies, it is a thoughtful story about love overcoming the programming of self hate. But there is, in fact, (spoilers) shameful jizzim.

The books are better together, read as one.

SPOILER HEAVY ANALYSIS TIME

Rukis constructs a believable fictional religion that pulls a lot of inspiration from historical Catholic imagery and deploys it in a thoughtful exploration and critique of the institution and practice of religion. Many characters in the novel represent views or beliefs about religion and the book is filled with all kinds of challenging conversations and representations. Malachi, Dolus, and of course our leads Isidor and Darcy represent important lenses through which Religion might affect a person’s life.

Dolus’s experience with religion is initially characterized, by Isidor’s ignorance of the man, as light and easy going. However, as we understand him better throughout the novel we come to learn that he is not trapped in the system or injured by it, like so many other characters within the novel. Dolus is not easy going. He is simply power drunk. He can be interpreted as The Evils of the ministry. He doesn’t care about corruption or sin, though he is comfortable using them as his own weapons. All he cares about is his own skin. He doesn’t offer compassion or comfort, nor divine retribution. Even though it is his greatest skill, he doesn’t punish sinners (if a thing called sin even exists). He feeds his own pleasures and ego by hurting any within his wake, simply because he has the power to do so. Obviously, his biggest foil is Father Halstrom, the inquisitor now retired. Halstrom is, in fact, the man who Dolus should have become when he was tasked with raising the young. Instead, Dolus only became more embittered and because he has clearly always used his status to his own ends he remains, even after his actions continued to pile up recognizable, identifiable atrocities. The kind of actions that leave people hurt in ways that are not easy to heal from.

Malachi and Isidor’s experiences are established as parallels to one another. Isidor recognizes that the man is a grim reflection of who he could have become if he’d not had such a fateful run-in with Darcy. Malachi has suffered great amounts of pain and repression in his life. His actions are not justifiable but they are understandable. Malachi is, in many ways, the archetypical religious conversion gay man. He uses his pain and belief in Canus (God) to view himself as better. He knows he is above those who commit the sin of homosexuality and do not “get right with god” about it. He identifies with the suffering he inflicts upon himself and sees himself as fundamentally broken. That is the richest vein of his character, that has been hurt so badly that he doesn’t believe in the repression. He needs it. When Isidor tries to echo Darcy’s belief that god could not make a person broken, we see so much more of his tortured soul. It’s like Isidore is slowly cutting the last threads on the rope that is keeping him from falling to his death. We see that in his reaction as well, he says that it doesn’t even matter if what he believes isn’t true. It can’t be untrue, because his doggedness and his penance is the razor edged jenga block that’s keeping him together. He is a hot mess of blood, scars, and abuse vacuum sealed into the giant shape of a man. This is the last piece, seeing Malachi for what he truly is, is the last thing Isidor needed to understand that his newly solidified views on god and the ministry are correct. But the first thing he needed was Darcy.

In the beginning, Isidor is beset by a constant stream of self doubt, self hate, and shame that leads him to being his Father’s favorite leaky boat. There is a constant bailing of water out of himself, a feature that was not only taught to him but rewarded in him by his order. However, when he meets Darcy for the first time, they have an actual real talk about religion, and he is not only pleased by talking about it but is earnestly fulfilled by hearing challenges to his construction of faith. There is doubt within him, doubt that’s not fully pictured but is clear from the outset. Darcy’s words regarding the nature of sin and the meaning of suffering open Isidor’s eyes to something he may have always felt was true. When he is reunited with his father, he fully opens up about everything. It’s clear in those moments that they talk about things they never once mentioned to each other before. There is something about the act of questioning the ministry that bonds the two men more than anything ever could. Isidor doesn’t reflect on it much, but Halstrom has his number when he sees him after the week in the cabin with Darcy. Isidor’s father pulls him by the nape of his neck out of the frying pan that was crafted under him by his teachings and his desire to fulfil them. It’s clear then, more so then it had ever been to Isidor, that his father believes in a loving god. Maybe the old bloodhound had to learn it with time, but the two agree that the ministry is simply rotten in many ways. Something that Isidore realizes his father had primed to learn on his own. When he is ready to love Darcy, Isidor feels no guilt over it. He follows what he believes Canus wants for him. What Darcy knows their god wants for them.

‘Stolen Kiss’
Darcy and Isidor from my novel ‘HeartTheft’

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— Rukis (@rukis.bsky.social) October 21, 2024 at 5:25 PM

In a lot of ways, there is a skewering of organized religion within the pages of HeartTheft, but the real story is how love is the most important thing. It doesn’t make fun of or condemn belief. For that reason, it is an incredibly powerful deconstruction story.

My only criticism for the novel has very little to do with character or theme and is really more of a craft concern. A concern that is fleeting and doesn’t compare to what is very, very right about this book. I mentioned in my initial thoughts that I doubt that this story needed to be 806 pages.

I struggled a lot with chapters 2-6. I found myself somewhat frustrated that things weren’t happening. It was a lot of descriptions of things that had happened and connective tissue that joined many scenes and events together. This happens though with bigger works, there are always weaker sections. Sometimes those get cut or revised. It’s clear that Rukis was very passionate about these characters and this story. I’m also very pleased and passionate about them, after I began to connect with them at least. I genuinely believe the story would have benefited from zooming in on the cat and mouse aspects between Darcy and Isidor more in the beginning. I don’t think it should have concerned itself with bridging all the events within Isidor’s reflections. One thing that stands out as more evidence that those chapters needed more work is how investigation is skipped over, when in the rest of the book the investigation and mystery is handled so, so, so much better.

There is a lot of bloat, and I simply can’t ignore that in the work. I don’t think it’s so intense as to hinder what is good, however. Oftentimes in the book you’ll get a description of something twice. Usually a paragraph will state a thing, and then the next paragraph will state the same thing in a slightly different way. A lot of the descriptions tend to stall out the flow of scenes. I assume it is meant to be a representation of Isidor’s internal monologue sorta spinning out in his mind, locking him up, but it was so worrisome early on in the novel as the story was still finding its footing. Once things were moving, I found it was usually insightful, providing characterization to Isidor or the world.

I hope that criticism isn’t too harsh. It comes from a place of genuine enjoyment of this novel.

The stars of the show are, of course, Darcy and Isidor. Darcy is first because of that deep admiration the boy feels. I know tropey talk can be sorta annoying to some, but the “enemies to lovers” “slow burn” realization-and-acceptance-of-love-plot in this book is pulled off very well. It is more than the tropes it brought to the table. I appreciate how expectations and tone are delivered across the story. There are so many wonderful characters that feel well thought out, but we truly see Darcy and Isidor go through their own developments. I do have a very important reflection on Darcy’s gender as well. It was handled very well.

It’s clear early on that Isidor builds up feelings for Darcy. A strange attraction that fuels him to hunt the feline more effectively. The devices deployed to bring them together don’t overstay their welcome. In fact, the forced domesticity element is amazing. I almost wished we’d gotten more. The constant struggle that Isidor goes through with his physical attraction for Darcy is really stunning. I appreciate the amount of attention that is paid to the guilt Isidor feels and where it lies. In a lot of respects, he is such a perfectly written character to fit with Darcy. I appreciate that when Isidor is told to go with Darcy to keep them safe, he says no. The fact that he says no twice, that he’s given a chance to rescind his denial is also very powerful. The man just doesn’t trust his own feelings and that is clear. Cillian is deployed perfectly in the second book/second half of the book. He tells Isidor to his face “don’t wait to tell someone how you feel” and then Isdor fucks up and doesn’t express any of his, albeit very complex but, very real feelings. His mistake is IMMEDIATELY punished, which was hard to read. I struggled with him not choosing Darcy, but it made the book stronger and I’m very pleased with how it all worked out.

Darcy is a very compelling character as well. I mentioned that the two are well fitting, and  it comes down to Isidor’s desire to please Darcy. That’s what the feline needs from someone. They need someone who sees them for them and champions them. Darcy’s biggest flaw is not a lack of belief in love. They can tell themselves all day that they struggle with believing people, but it’s clear they have faith in Isidor. It oozes out of them on the page when they’re together. It’s more that Darcy struggles with feeling they deserve love, and that’s what Isidor’s whole thing about Darcy is. I was worried initially that this romance was going to be a bait and switch, that the “good thing” for Darcy would be going to Cillian or getting free from any love. Darcy is Isidor’s silver bullet to the chains of sin, and Isidor is Darcy’s mirror that shows them how much they deserve to live. I appreciate the thought put into the balance of Darcy’s behavior as well, speaking metanarratively. The character being a thief could be off putting to people but they have strong beliefs and morals about what is right and wrong and it’s clear that is why Isidor loves them. Darcy’s more obvious struggle in the story is boxes. People think cats will sit in any box, but some refuse to.

I have heard Rukis faced some pushback regarding the choice “not to show the junk” which feels like a very specific kind of person’s opinion. I was aware of this by the time the sex happened in the book and was eager to see how it was, ya know… handled. (Get it?) (A sex joke.) The obvious concern is how do you describe sex without describing the parts smoooshing in some configuration (preferably the pairing of flesh parts that I like (THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IS THE OBSERVER)), which is maybe a bit juvenile to believe wholeheartedly. A perceptive reader may have noticed that I have very subtly allowed my opinion slip into this object analysis of art. It is a sane question though. How do you rim a cat without describing the parts? The only valid answer for me is to make fun of the people asking the question. Maybe that’s because I am a trans person and nonbinary and have struggled with what that means when it comes to a person’s body. Honestly, no one understands trans and nonbinary bodies. It’s always about the meat. What is the meat doing, is it inside of you or outside of you.

Darcy’s big question as a fictional character in a written novel is how do we get the reader to not put them in a box and still find them attractive. Speaking from experience, once you’ve been defined by a certain majority of people it truly is a burden. You don’t get that story for yourself anymore. You are no longer yourself, you’re answered. A person has done the mental tallying and now you are defined, no matter how you feel. It’s the I know you’re a woman, BUT. I know you’re nonbinary, can’t we just say x thing though. As a trans or nonbinary person, any and everyone will probably do this to you at some point. Even allies, people who don’t just want to fetishize you or take away your rights. People who say they understand you. Those are the times it hurts the worst.

This novel/novels captures not only that idea well, but we see it happen to Darcy when Isidor sees them for the first time. The fear and the pain of it coming out of them. They’ve just been tortured, but the reveal of what’s in their pants is the only thing hurting them. And Isidor doesn’t see it. Literally. It is not described. It is not defined because it doesn’t matter to him. He loves Darcy. Not the meat, or the in-or-out-ness of it.

And that’s pretty fucking astounding to me.

I was moved by that.

That will stick with me.

– Kacey Pink

For more by Kacey, visit her site, follow on Bluesky or check out her Patreon. 

Did you know you can read the first five chapters of Sanctuary for free? The trans lesbian werewolf lovers reunion story all about love and over coming trauma together.

www.patreon.com/posts/s-ctr-…

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— Kacey Pink is Writing (@anotherwolf.bsky.social) February 3, 2025 at 11:08 PM

Like the article? These take hard work. For more free furry news, follow on Twitter or support not-for-profit Dogpatch Press on Patreon. Want to get involved? Try these subreddits: r/furrydiscuss for news or r/waginheaven for the best of the community. Or send guest writing here. (Content Policy.)

Isle of Swaps developer Fuzz Force recently announced their latest project, Idle Critter Adventure!

 

Idle Critter Adventure is a game that players can have safely running on their second monitor or on their desktop while they do other things. Simply choose an area and Alfa will start battling trainers and collecting critters. Assemble a strong team to take on clubs and work your way toward being the champion! Players can even be a bit more active by pressing run to run faster or cheering on their critters. Get ready to embark on a new adventure with your favorite critters as familiar faces like Wallablaze and Zappen return. Check out our review of Fuzz Force's previous game, Isle of Swaps!

No release date as of yet but keep an eye on Fuzz Force’s socials for updates and expect more coverage from us as well

Fuzz Forces socials:

Website: https://www.fuzz-force.com/

Twitter: https://x.com/fuzzforce

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCF7faj88XRePOjMpDd_NUnQ

Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/fuzzforce.bsky.social

TigerTails Radio Season 16 Episode 02. Join the Discord Chat: https://discord.gg/SQ5QuRf Join the Telegram Chat: https://t.me/+yold2C77m0I1MmM0 Visit the website at http://www.tigertailsradio.co.uk. See website for full breakdown of any song credits, which is usually updated shortly after the show. Credits: Opening music: Magic by Hedge Haiden (Double Hedge Studios) Character art: Fitzroy Fox - https://www.furaffinity.net/user/lunara-toons / https://bsky.app/profile/fitzroyfox.bsky.social Background art: Charleston Rat - https://www.furaffinity.net/user/charlestonrat / https://bsky.app/profile/charlestonrat.bsky.social If you like what we do and wish to throw some pennies our way to support us, please consider sending a little tip our way. https://streamlabs.com/tigertailsradio/tip * Please note, tips are made to support TigerTails Radio and are assumed as made with good faith, so are therefore non-refundable. Thank you for your support and understanding.

It’s nowhere near Halloween, but let us introduce you to the star of the Olivia Wolf series of graphic novels, written and illustrated by Jose Fragoso. The first book is called Olivia Wolf and the Moldy Sandwich. “It seems like just another ordinary day in Monstrocity, where monsters and humans live peacefully side by side. But when a teacher goes missing at school, it’s up to Olivia, a brave werewolf girl, together with her friends Bela the vampire, Fred the fly, Sam the invisible man, and Elliot the human, to save the day! Where could Professor Swamp be? And could Fred the fly’s missing moldy cheese sandwich have anything to do with his disappearance?” Look for it over at NubeOcho.

image c. 2025 NubeOcho

How did January pass so quickly and yet last for 87 agonizing days? I meant to post about the Cóyotl Awards a few weeks ago but it completely slipped my mind.

If you’re a guild member with qualifying work published in 2024, or if you’re a guild member who read a qualifying work published in 2024 and want to make sure everyone else reads it, we’re compiling a recommended reading list before we open for nominations. I haven’t set up a submission form, so the best way to suggest work is to email us or use the promote work form linked in the sidebar to the right. Please make sure to indicate that you’re recommending works for the Cóyotls! Recommendations will be compiled in a new post at https://coyotlawards.com/ so you can find works you missed during the year.

Official Cóyotl Award nominations will start on March 1 and voting will start around April 1 (or as soon after that as we can get the nominations verified and organized into a ballot). This is a reminder that we are seeking a guild member who would like to take over the vacant Cóyotl Award Chair position. Guild officer elections will also occur in April.

If you’re having a hard time lately, remember that honing your craft as a writer is a valid and healthy way to cope with world events. No one can write the way you do. Your art is unique, just like you are, and it’s important to the world. You are important to the world! Anyone who implies otherwise has no soul.

Here are the current open markets for your short stories:
Spirit of the Wolf – Deadline March 31st 2025
The Second Hayven Celestia Anthology – Deadline July 15, 2025
Indecent Exposure – Deadline When Full
This Is Halloween – Deadline When Full
Children Of The Night – Deadline When Full
Furry/Lovecraftian/Erotic/University Themed Anthology – Deadline When Full
Plott Hound Magazine will be opening for short story submissions on March 1, 2025

Please also check out the latest book releases from our members:

Legend of Ahya: Broken Empires, by Matthew Colvath. Released October 2nd 2024.
Space Dragons: Luxorian’s Crew, by Veo Corva. Released November 12th 2024.
Catfish and Other Stories, by K.C. Shaw. Released November 30th 2024.
Wolf Tech 3: The Alphas, by Adam Webster. Released December 10th 2024.

Happy writing!

Kate Shaw

When looking for new adventure narrative games to play through, I want to know that what I’m starting is gonna be compelling enough to finish. It’s like opening a new book after reading the teaser on the back cover. What’s going to make me want to start that first chapter? Threefold Recital, the first release by developer Everscape Games, grabs your attention with a threefold story that revolves around a wolf-turned monk, a fox-turned-priest, and a snake-turned-artist. Its beautiful art is the backdrop for weaving a story within an oriental fantasy world that mixes magic, technologies old and new, and the tensions between humans, dragons, and the beastlings (like the ones we get to play as within the intertwining stories.) Though it takes a bit for the plot to really get going, once it does it becomes like a book that you don’t want to put down until you reach the end. With charming storytelling, a diverse cast of furry characters throughout, and enough inventive puzzle-solving minigames to keep things gamified enough, Threefold Recital had me hooked.

What’s better than sitting on a couch with friends, playing through a cooperative experience together, joyously enjoying each other’s company and a shared love of gaming? Well, riding them like a mounted cavalry into battle as you both combine powerful magical attacks sounds better, doesn’t it? That’s what Coridden promises will separate itself from the pack of action RPGs out there. In Coridden, you and up to 3 friends explore the world of Heera cooperatively, completing quests and fighting mobs of creatures and bandits to try and find your way into the legendary and locked away city of Aasha. To accomplish this, you’ll have to level up and choose to go down a plethora of possible specialization paths to equip yourself with new attack spells, defensive buffs, and, even more excitingly, beastly abilities. For a small dev team, Aftnareld has given gaming friend groups a nicely packaged adventure that is 100% worth playing.

Dear Papabear,

I hope you’re doing well. I’ve been feeling a lot of conflicting emotions lately and was hoping to hear your thoughts about something personal.

Recently, I joined a furry Discord server hoping to connect with others in the community and ease my growing loneliness. While the people there are incredibly kind and supportive, I’ve found that instead of feeling more connected, being surrounded by their positivity and camaraderie has only amplified my sense of isolation.

I decided to suggest a space in the server where people could openly share their struggles—a place for vulnerability and honesty—because I thought it might help people like me who feel disconnected. However, the suggestion was understandably denied for reasons I had anticipated, such as concerns over moderation, misuse, and triggering content.

Now that it’s been denied, I’m reflecting on everything, and I find myself caught in a loop of feelings. On one hand, I respect the mods’ decision, and I never wanted to create a burden for them or the community. On the other hand, I can’t shake the feeling that my need for connection, and even my loneliness itself, is something selfish or shameful.

I guess what I’m trying to ask is: how can I come to terms with these feelings of rejection and loneliness without internalizing them as a reflection of my worth? And how can I continue to seek connection and be honest about my struggles without feeling like a burden to others?

Thank you so much for reading this. I deeply appreciate your time and guidance.

Sincerely,
Samuel (23, Indonesia)

* * *

Hi, Samuel,

Thank you for your email. Quick question before I reply with a full response: Are you able to meet furries IN PERSON in Indonesia? I know there are furries in your country, but not sure whether you have been able to meet them in the real world.

Bear Hugs,
Papabear

* * *

Hi Papabear!


First of all thank you for the quick response. For your information, I have two furry friends from my country (one introduced by my best friend because I write a furry story, the other I found out is one when I was going through his art social media). However, the first one is much like me, struggling to find furry friends due to: (1) financial constraints to attend Indonesian furry expos (there is IWAG [Indonesian Weekend Anthro Gathering]), (2) having a hard-time looking for a furry server where the members are from Indonesian, and (3) having a terrible experience from Indonesian furries we DID meet online (we even used the app BARQ!), which is why the two of us are so keen on joining a server or meeting one not from our country.

As for the second friend, he's an anti-LGBTQ+ and I'm kinda discouraged to be friends with him, knowing that Indonesia itself has a strict religious law (so is my patriarchal and religious household). I myself have an anti-LGBTQ+ best friend that I don't mind hanging around and be vulnerable with at all (he even knows I'm a furry), but for this other friend... suffice to say that I don't want to be friends with him. When I confronted him in hopes to rekindle our friendship (literally a few days ago), he was being pretty rude, defensive, and outright disrespecting me even after saying "he respects my choice"; it's clear he didn't.

And... maybe to add a bit of context to the previous message, I’ve faced significant challenges that have made it almost impossible for me to seek professional psychological help. Financial constraints have always been a big barrier, but beyond that, there’s a strong stigma in my family around mental health (and the fact religion and politics are avoided discussions in servers are not helping). Discussions about seeking therapy are often shut down with the belief that religion is the solution to all struggles, and anything beyond that is seen as unnecessary or even shameful.

Ironically, I helped co-found a free counseling platform in Indonesia for almost six years now, called Berbagicerita.id, which aims to make counseling accessible for those in need. However, as the co-founder, I can’t use the platform myself because of ethical boundaries in psychology. It’s like this: when you’re working with staff you know personally, disclosing personal problems creates a conflict of interest that can affect the dynamic of future professional interactions. Even the founder, who has a difficult life too, don’t use the platform for the same reasons—it’s a boundary we all respect. While I’m incredibly proud of what we’ve built, it also leaves me in a difficult position, unable to access the kind of help I’ve been advocating for others.

And if you ask me why I don't use other free counseling platforms, it's because of the same reason as well. Many of the counselors or psychologists on these platforms are often connected within the same professional network as my own platform, or they could even end up being people I’ve collaborated with in the past. The overlap makes it difficult for me to seek help without worrying about breaching boundaries or feeling self-conscious about disclosing my struggles to people who might know me personally or professionally.

It’s frustrating because I truly believe in the importance of accessible mental health support—I’ve worked hard to help create it for others—but I’ve ended up in this unique and isolating position where the very system I advocate for feels inaccessible to me. That’s why I find myself turning to communities like the furry fandom, where I hope to find understanding and connection without the same layers of complication or judgment. The server modder who disclosed that my suggestion for a venting channel suggested me to find social group, but he doesn't know about this additional context/information because it's a very private information for me and I can't just disclose this to everyone in the community, even if it's just to add a context of where I'm coming from.

It’s frustrating because I truly believe in the importance of accessible mental health support—I’ve worked hard to help create it for others—but I’ve ended up in this unique and isolating position where the very system I advocate for feels inaccessible to me. That’s why I find myself turning to communities like the furry fandom, where I hope to find understanding and connection without the same layers of complication or judgment.

Thank you again for listening, and for taking the time to understand where I’m coming from. It means a lot to me.

Sincerely,
Samuel

P.S. Sorry, I'm just going to make the third paragraph less confusing:
And... maybe to add a bit more context to the previous message, I’ve faced significant challenges that have made it almost impossible for me to access professional psychological help. Financial constraints have always been a major obstacle, but even beyond that, my family holds a strong stigma against mental health support. In their view, religion is the ultimate solution to all struggles, and seeking therapy is often dismissed as unnecessary or even shameful. This mindset has created an environment where discussing mental health is not only avoided but actively discouraged. On top of that, the avoidance of topics like religion and politics in many online spaces, including this furry server I join, makes it even harder to express how deeply this affects me. I respect the boundary and am fully aware of it, but it doesn't make it any easier for me at all.
* * *

Hi, Samuel,

So, which Indonesian furry groups have you tried? Have you tried:

• https://furries.id/
• (5) FURRYINDONESIA(IDN) | Facebook
• Indonesia Furs (@indonesiafurs) • Instagram photos and videos ?

As you are aware, living in a Muslim country means you're going to have a tough time being a furry. Frankly, it's amazing that there exists the IWAG, and I heard there was a convention called PAWAI, but it did not have a convention in 2024 and probably won't this year. So, yes, that's rough. The furry community in general overwhelmingly embraces left-leaning, liberal views, such as acceptance of LGBTQIA people. We also believe in mental health. Rough to be in such a conservative culture that finds seeking emotional or mental counseling to be a "weakness." One also finds that attitude in Catholic-dominated countries such as Mexico and conservative countries like Nigeria in Africa. 

With the limited number of opportunities in Indonesia currently, it will indeed be a challenge for you to connect to your local peers with what is currently available.

But you already have hit upon a solution, even if you don't apparently realize it. When you saw a need for it, you cofounded Berbagicerita.id (and kudos to you for doing that!) As you stated, however, getting help from a professional group you helped to found does not really work, ethically speaking. 

Fortunately, that constraint doesn't apply when it comes to the furry fandom. Here are some examples from my personal experience:

1. Thirteen years ago, I saw a need for a place for furries to go for advice, so I created this advice column, "Ask Papabear."
2. Around the same time, I saw a need for a social media group for furries 30 and older, so I created the Facebook Greymuzzles page. 
3. Last year, I also founded the Silvermuzzles Facebook group for furries 50 and older. This addresses the needs of an aging furry demographic.
4. Six years ago, I founded The Good Furry Awards to help recognize good deeds performed by kind furries and to counteract all the negativity in the fandom.
5. Two years ago, I founded Uncle Bear Publishing (which is still getting off the ground) to produce educational nonfiction books for the furry fandom.
6. This year, I founded Furries for Freedom on Facebook to provide social support and education to furries living in the United States in the fascistic Trump era.
7. I even created a Bear Furries group on Facebook because bears are a minority and need to support one another in the fandom.

When you see a need for something but you can't find any existing resources and help, create a group, service, or product yourself to fulfill that need! I guarantee that you are not the only Indonesian who is in your predicament. Start a social media page, a vlog, a podcast, a website, or such-like things and get people to come to YOU. I will even help. If you do this and want to promote it, I will give you a free banner ad on my Ask Papabear page and promote it on my social media groups.

What say you?

Bear Hugs,
Papabear

* * *

Hi, Papabear,

Thank you so much for your thoughtful and encouraging response. It truly means a lot to me that you not only took the time to share your experiences but also provided concrete suggestions and support. Honestly, I’ve been reading your site’s “About” section and some of the letters others have sent you, and it’s inspiring to see how much you’ve built for the furry community and the impact you’ve had over the years. It’s clear how deeply you care about creating spaces for people to feel seen and supported, and I really admire that.

That said, I also want to be honest about where I’m at emotionally right now. While I deeply admire your “build what you can’t find” philosophy, it feels overwhelming to even imagine taking on that kind of responsibility at this point in my life. I feel like I’m still in the process of finding my own footing and understanding what I need to feel connected and supported.

Loneliness and the lack of safe spaces to truly be vulnerable have been long-standing challenges for me. I’ve spent so much of my life navigating environments where being open about my struggles felt unsafe or even impossible, at least when I'm not with my friends which I don't have much, really. The furry fandom feels like one of the few places where acceptance and understanding are deeply valued, which is why I’ve been so drawn to it. But even here, I sometimes feel like I’m standing on the sidelines, watching others find belonging while not knowing how to step in myself without feeling like I’m asking too much. It’s as though everyone else has already traveled miles ahead on their journey of self-acceptance and connection, while I’m still stumbling at the starting line. And the last thing I want is to weigh anyone down by pretending I’ve caught up when I know deep down I haven’t.

One thing I’ve realized too is that I know I’ve fallen into this habit of defining myself and my worth through my vulnerabilities—what I consider the “ugly” or broken parts of me. It’s almost as though my struggles with basically everything in this life have become a kind of shorthand for my identity, when in reality, those "ugly" things are only part of who I am. I know I’m not just a collection of struggles; I’m a multifaceted person with dreams, interests, and values that go beyond these challenges. Still, I feel like I’ve let these struggles take up so much space in how I see myself and how I present myself to others, and I guess that's why I'm so desperate for connection...
I’ve also been grappling with a deeply rooted sense of what’s “ethical” when it comes to vulnerability, which only amplifies this sense of existential isolation and angst. Even in a space as welcoming and inclusive as the furry community, I can’t seem to shake the fear of being seen as a burden—of overwhelming others with my struggles or taking up too much space. This fear isn’t just fleeting; It's been a part of my principles. This kind of irrational-but- understandable fear has even triggered panic attacks in the past, where the thought of being “too much” for others (or worse, being completely forgotten) has left me paralyzed.

It’s a complicated mix of self-awareness and self-doubt, really. On one hand, I recognize my struggles and understand that everyone has limits to how much they can take on emotionally (like people in any Discord server, not just furry). On the other hand, this hyper-awareness makes me hesitate to reach out at all, as if my desire for connection might outweigh someone else’s ability or willingness to hold space for me. It’s like walking a tightrope between craving meaningful relationships and being terrified of what they might cost—whether that cost is pushing someone away, feeling rejected, or confirming my worst fear: that I’m fundamentally too much to handle.

Underneath all this is a deeper longing to break free from cycles of hatred, both external and internal. I’m exhausted from hating parts of myself that I didn’t choose and from feeling like those same parts make me an outsider. And I’m equally tired of the unspoken battles with judgment, both within myself and from others, that make vulnerability feel like a double-edged sword. I just want to exist as I am—flawed, complex, and human—without fear that my authenticity will hurt or alienate the very people I want to connect with.

But then again, vulnerability is not always appreciated, and boundaries exist, and I can’t expect everyone to have the capacity or the energy to handle what I bring to the table. And since I'm too self-aware of everything, I understand that very well. and I deeply respect people’s right to protect their own emotional well-being. But at the same time, it’s hard not to wonder where that leaves me—how I can navigate these boundaries without shutting myself off entirely. I want to honor both my needs and the needs of others, but finding that balance feels like an impossible puzzle one of these digital days.

I guess what I’m trying to say is that I’m looking for guidance on how to move forward when it feels like everything is weighing me down. How do I approach building meaningful connections without being consumed by fear or self-doubt? How do I allow myself to be vulnerable in ways that feel healthy and ethical, for both myself and those around me? And perhaps most importantly, how do I stop defining myself by my struggles and instead learn to embrace the full scope of who I am?
Thank you again for your kindness and for offering to help. Your willingness to listen and share your wisdom has already made me feel a little less alone, and I’m incredibly grateful for that.

Sincere Hugs,
Samuel

* * *

Dear Samuel,

I understand that creating a social group and leading it is not for everyone. Don't feel bad about that.

Next question: What do you feel are your "vulnerabilities" and "weaknesses"? What qualities do you feel others are judging you for--and, more importantly--are YOU judging yourself for?

pbear

* * *

Dear Papabear,


To answer your question, I would say that my vulnerabilities often lie in how deeply I feel and experience things. It’s like I’m constantly walking around with raw emotions, sometimes even when I don’t want to. It makes it difficult to function normally or engage with others without feeling like my emotions are too overwhelming, not just for me, but for those around me too. I find myself hyper-aware of this, as if my emotional intensity might somehow spill over into every interaction or space I enter, which is one of the reasons I’ve often kept my struggles hidden or downplayed them.

I also judge myself for the times when I feel like I’m too much to handle. Whether it’s being too vulnerable, too emotional, or too open about my challenges, there’s this constant nagging voice that tells me I’m asking too much from others. It's like there’s always this internal weighing of whether my need for connection is valid or just a burden. That makes me hold back from being authentic sometimes, because I fear that if I let it all show, people will pull away or even look at me with pity or judgment.

I think I also carry around this fear of being judged for the very parts of me I find hardest to accept—my flaws, my mental health struggles, and the moments when I just feel lost. It’s hard to separate those things from my identity, and I often wonder if others are seeing me through that lens, too. I’m afraid that I’m defined only by the parts of me I wish I could change or get rid of.

But at the same time, I know that these “vulnerabilities” don’t define me as a whole person. They’re just pieces of a larger puzzle that I haven’t fully figured out yet. That’s why I sometimes feel so conflicted about being vulnerable—because I’m still trying to make sense of it all, to figure out which parts of me deserve to be seen and shared, and which parts need more healing before they can be part of my connection with others.

I’m still young and learning how to balance those feelings and not let them take up all the space in my life. I want to move toward a place where I can accept both the beauty and the brokenness of who I am, and where I don’t feel so deeply judged by myself or by others for being human.

I hope this gives you a clearer sense of what I’m grappling with, and I look forward to hearing your thoughts. Apologies in advance if everything about my letter getting too heavy or philosophical at this point.

Warmly,
Samuel

* * *

Hi, Samuel,

My next question is perhaps rather obvious: Have you ever been diagnosed as being on the autism spectrum? 

Pbear

* * *

Hi, Papabear
No, I have not. I've never been diagonosed with anything (neurologically and psychologically).
Samuel

* * *

Tell me, do you have any of these symptoms?

Signs and Symptoms of Autism Spectrum Disorder | Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) | CDC

pbear

* * *

I've just read the website. I don't think I used to display any of these symptoms back when I was a kid because I wasn't afraid to make friends back then.

I just asked my mom and she said I've been shy since I was a baby. She also said that I'm always the one approached first and not the one approaching, that I'd even hide behind people if I make eye contact. I guess looking back at the friendships I made during my school years, even now that I've finished college, it makes sense.

Samuel
* * *

Well, it sounds like you are simply shy, which is different from being autistic, of course.

I was very shy as a child, too, and as a teen. I was terrified of speaking in public, but I overcame this. How? By becoming a zoo docent. A docent, if you don't know, is a volunteer who talks to guests about exhibits, such as at museums and zoos. I was a docent at the Detroit Zoo and then the Potter Park Zoo in Lansing, Michigan. To be a docent, you have to take a class to learn about the animals on exhibit and also basics of zoology and the environment. When you finish the class, you can give tours and school visits and other presentations for the zoo society, which, of course, means public speaking.

The reasons why this helped me overcome my fear of speaking in front of groups were that I knew the subject matter and I cared about what I was telling people. Once you have these factors in your pocket, it dramatically reduces your fears because you gain confidence in your material. At least, that was true in my case. I think it was for others, too.

To reduce shyness, you therefore require confidence in yourself. How does one accomplish this? Several ways:

• Practice mindfulness. These two words encompass a lot, but basically it means being fully aware of your surroundings and your bodily state in the present moment. Building this skill helps decrease and eventually eliminate reflexive and destructive thoughts and emotions. To save space, here's a helpful link on tips on how to practice mindfulness:  How to Practice Mindfulness: 11 Practical Steps and Tips
• Related to mindfulness is to stop seeking approval and vaildation from others. Much misery and anxiety is found in people who base their existence on a desperate need to gain the approval of family, friends, and peers. Stop worrying about what others think and be yourself. I know, that is a lot easier for me to write than it is to do, but you can do it with practice and time.
• Don't over analyze and overthink things. This gets you stuck in, as you say, a loop that will prevent you from taking action and doom you to a state of pointless self-reflection.
• Do not indulge in self-criticism. This is a toughy. Whenever you find yourself saying something negative about who you are, pause, find a mirror, look at yourself, and say 3 good things about yourself for every 1 thing you said that was bad. 
• Only speak when you know what you're talking about; if you don't know what you're talking about, listen.
• Read read read read. There is so much to learn about our universe! Consume information like a thirsty man in the desert.

Once you have practiced the above for a sufficient amount of time, you will find your self-confidence has grown considerably. When we are self-confident and accepting of ourselves, we no longer feel lonely even when we are alone because we no longer need validation of others or even the company of others to feel comfortable in our own skin. There is a difference between being alone and being lonely, you see.

How does this solve your problem? You will find it true that people who are desperate for companionship exude an air of desperation that is offputting to others and drives them away. When you are no longer desperate for company, people gravitate to you. There is something extremely attractive about someone who is comfortable in their own skin. They feel genuine, and genuine people tend not to be fakes and liars, which is also very appealing.

Even though you still have the issue of limited socializing opportunities in Indonesia, this is the start of helping you not only to connect to others but also to not feel desperate when you do not do so quickly because you are fine on your own. He who is comfortable being alone with himself will never be lonely.

Thoughts?

pbear

* * *

Dear Papabear,
I’ve read through your suggestions carefully, and I've written and rewritten this reply for almost three hours. I have to admit that you’ve hit on some truths I’ve been reluctant to fully admit to myself. I'm not just shy, but I do also struggle with overcoming shyness itself, though I think my situation is also worsened by a history of overthinking, self-hatred, and self-doubt that often spirals into fear of judgment or rejection. What you’re saying about mindfulness, self-acceptance, and letting go of the need for external validation, however, really resonates with me, even if it feels like a steep hill to climb right now.
I think one of my biggest challenges is the constant internal push-and-pull between wanting to connect deeply with others and fearing that I’m too much to handle. It’s like I know, intellectually, that I shouldn’t define myself by other people’s perceptions or approval, but emotionally, it’s harder to internalize that. You’re right: this fear of rejection and the pressure to “be enough” causes me to act in ways that probably come across as desperate, even if I don’t mean to. Your reminder that self-confidence and authenticity naturally draw people in is going to be something I’ll try to keep in mind as I work on myself.
Your story about being a zoo docent was also comforting to hear. I think a big part of my struggle is that I’ve let my fears hold me back from taking those kinds of risks; whether it’s joining a group or starting a conversation. Reading about how you overcame your shyness reminds me that change is possible, but only if I’m willing to take the first step voluntarily.
You're also... very right about how I spend a lot of time in my head, analyzing every little thing I say or do and how others might interpret it. This overthinking keeps me stuck and prevents me from taking meaningful action, whether it’s pursuing friendships or simply allowing myself to enjoy the moment.
Reflecting on this now reminds me of the time I used to struggle a lot with anger, which I'm pretty sure may have been linked to undiagnosed intermittent explosive disorder (IED) and was heavily influenced by my environment. Growing up, my "family dynamics" played a big role in shaping my emotional responses. Constant tension, my parents’ fights, and the emotional outlet my brother and I became... I experienced punishment, neglect, or criticism over small things, like getting wet in the rain or taking a bath "clumsily," and that emotional strain built up over time. As I got older and my brother distanced himself, I became even more isolated in my frustration.
While I can acknowledge how my environment influenced me, I also realize that I was the agent of my own anger; just as I am right now the agent of my own criticism. It was exhausting, and at some point, I just decided to let go because I don't want to be like my mother, although she's better now despite her still-suffocating religious principles. I still have moments of irritation, of course, but they’re far less intense than they used to be. And now, thinking about what you’ve said, I realize how much mental space I still give to these loops of self-reflection—why this, why that. Maybe just like I stop letting my anger control me, I should also stop letting my crticisms control me. Maybe I should also internalize the idea that I don't want to be what my parents made me do to myself.
Maybe I should also admit that it’s mentally draining to constantly question whether I’ve shared too much or if my vulnerability is a burden to others. I think my shyness often comes from this fear of opening up too far, too fast, and then being judged for it. Perhaps I should care less about whether I’ve revealed too much or if others are silently judging me. Maybe that way I can actually start to connect with people in a way that feels genuine instead of forced or guarded. Do it not too slow, not too fast, but just the right amount: at its own pace.
Finally, your point about being “alone” vs. “lonely” really hit home. I’ve always struggled to be comfortable in my own company, and it often turns into brooding or self-criticism rather than a chance to recharge. I’m realizing that if I can be at peace with my own presence, it’ll help with everything else—self-acceptance, confidence, and connecting with others without relying on validation.
Thank you again for your kindness and honesty. You’ve given me a lot to think about and work on, and while I know change won’t happen overnight, I feel like I have a much better sense of where to start now.
Warmly,
Samuel

* * *

Hi, Samuel,

Well, I don't think I said this would be easy. I really only started to come into my own truth about 10 years ago. I spent 50 years feeling miserable and trying to please others. It never works. You have to be who you are and accept who you are.

IMHO, one of the best paths to do this is to learn about Buddhism. Buddhism is a philosophy, not a religion, and teaches us mindfulness and acceptance of ourselves and the universe. Another good path is Wicca, which is a modern version of traditional "pagan" beliefs as they were once followed by the Druids. You can also study the Stoics, which I have found helpful.

Good luck to you.

Pbear

TigerTails Radio Season 16 Episode 01. Join the Discord Chat: https://discord.gg/SQ5QuRf Join the Telegram Chat: https://t.me/+yold2C77m0I1MmM0 Visit the website at http://www.tigertailsradio.co.uk. See website for full breakdown of any song credits, which is usually updated shortly after the show. Credits: Opening music: Magic by Hedge Haiden (Double Hedge Studios) Character art: Fitzroy Fox - https://www.furaffinity.net/user/lunara-toons / https://bsky.app/profile/fitzroyfox.bsky.social Background art: Charleston Rat - https://www.furaffinity.net/user/charlestonrat / https://bsky.app/profile/charlestonrat.bsky.social If you like what we do and wish to throw some pennies our way to support us, please consider sending a little tip our way. https://streamlabs.com/tigertailsradio/tip * Please note, tips are made to support TigerTails Radio and are assumed as made with good faith, so are therefore non-refundable. Thank you for your support and understanding.

Every now and then, a game will be released that reminds you why you love playing big, well-produced games in the first place. Ones that go beyond simple concepts or entertainment, and really deliver on the satisfaction of feeling like you’re playing something that could only be polished and produced at the time of gaming that we’re living in. Eternal Strands is one of those experiences. You play as Brynn, a Weaver of magic that leads an eclectic group of determined fellow Weavers on a mission of discovery and salvation. Throughout your time in the “Enclave” and beyond, you’ll face element-enhanced minions, towering & thunderous constructs, and scaly & feathered beasts in abundance, as you piece together what happened while the denizens outside of your home city were locked beyond “The Veil” that none can cross because of the “tangles” that are fatal to try and pass through. At your disposal will be a bevy of magical abilities and attacks, including ones based on fire, ice, and kinetic energies, along with weapons. All of these, along with the ability to pick up and throw just about anything (including enemies), are combined for some of the coolest and most hectic combat situations I’ve played in a while. Eternal Strands combines an engaging storyline with an impeccably chosen cast of characters and voice actors and an inventive magic casting combat system to pull you into a world you won’t want to escape from.

As a 90’s kid, you’d think I’d be one of the many who grew up with the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles franchise. Yet, I don’t remember ever watching the show as a kid at all, outside of renting the second TMNT movie from Blockbusters one day just out of sheer curiosity. To be honest, I was more into shows like Beetleborgs (which I’m still waiting for a game of that series) and Van-Pires (if you remember that show, you are my friend for life), so something like TMNT probably didn’t interest me at the time, though I could be wrong. But that doesn’t mean I know nothing of them. On the contrary, I do have some knowledge of the Turtles, thanks to the advent of the internet and the 2003 show which I do recall watching some episodes of when it aired, but not enough to say I’m a huge fan. With that being said, you’d think a game like Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Shredder’s Revenge wouldn’t really interest me. Surprisingly, it’s actually one of those games I took a chance on and found myself really enjoying, even though it does have some shortcomings that prevent it from being anything really amazing.

Here’s an origin story for a group known as The Fluffle: Three bad bunny crime lords. “This story starts, as stories often do, with a tragedy. Three bunnies are left without their mother when she goes off to Brazil to learn jiujitsu. The bunnies, Flop, Biggie, and Boingie, learn some hard truths about life pretty quick: Squirrels will take over your cozy nest as soon as you leave and refuse to give it back, dogs are to be avoided at all costs, and raccoons will believe anything you tell them. With quick thinking, ingenuity, and maybe a little bit of raccoon manipulation, these three buns will take on all comers to be the rulers of the park. Will they win? Well, this is an origin story . . .” Buns Gone Bad is the first book in the Fluffle Bunnies series of graphic novels for young readers, written by Anna Humphrey and illustrated by Irma Kniivila. Look for it in hardcover from Penguin Random House. (Oh, and the sequel is called Big City Buns.)

Image c. 2025 Penguin Random House

MOOBARKFLUFF! Click here to send us a comment or message about the show!

Bearly, Taebyn, Rayne, TickTock and Cheetaro gather for another great Episode of BFFT! All the furs are still recovering from ANW so may be a little confusy this week…but when aren’t we? Taebyn loses it gain this episode. We get a Con Recap of ANW. We play a little This or That, Taebyn reads us a sweet story, Cheetaro reviews ‘The Land Before Time’, and TickTock reports on some furry news. Of course we have our requisite foibles and nonsense as well, so tune in because you won’t want to miss any exciting moments here on BFFT!  Moobarkfluff everyfur!

This podcast contains adult language and adult topics. It is rated M for Mature. Listener discretion is advised.

Support the show

Thanks to all our listeners and to our staff: Bearly Normal, Rayne Raccoon, Taebyn, Cheetaro, TickTock, and Ziggy the Meme Weasel.

You can send us a message on Telegram at BFFT Chat, or via email at: bearlyfurcasting@gmail.com

Bearly Furcasting S5E16 - Cow, Cow, and More Cow

Last month, Belgian developer Mortis Ghost and publisher Fangamer announced the unexpected return of the influential RPG OFF in 2025. Now, they've announced that legendary indiegame creator and composer Toby Fox (UNDERTALE, DELTARUNE) will be a featured music composer for the new soundtrack that was developed for the game's newest release. Toby Fox first discovered OFF's English fan translation on the Starmen.net forums, an EarthBound fan website whose staff eventually created Fangamer.

Toby cited OFF multiple times in his UNDERTALE Art Book as an inspiration for his designs, especially the character designs. ​ Papyrus’s appearance initially inspired by the first boss, Dedan. Next, Sans was inspired by Zacharie and the judge: A reliable, friendly, humorous character who shows up throughout the adventure, and you never quite know what his deal is.

Toby Fox ended up handling a lot of boss tracks and was also assigned the normal battle theme. Pepper Steak, the most famous song from the original OST, is well-loved by fans with millions of listens across various platforms.

"I'm gonna be honest, just feels like I got assigned to take a bullet in the back for everybody else. I looked up almost every jazz song from the 1920s, I commissioned Carlos to make an entire fake jazz song for me so I could cut it up into samples, I tried making like 6 entirely different songs, but nothing I could come up with on my own felt quite right.
​​
​In the end, I summoned Camellia to help me out by re-remixing my ​
​first track into multiple versions, and ultimately I think it will ​
​feel pretty cool as you go through the game." ​
​- Toby Fox

White Meat, the new battle theme for OFF by Toby Fox & Camellia:

Toby did the music for free, and he'll upload his tracks for free after the game comes out. The full interview with Toby Fox is available HERE!

Here's the trailer for the new OFF release!

What makes Furries so Fruity? Arrkay deep dives into Drag, Gender, The Litterbox and the Fursona in this exploration of a fandoms sexuality. 0:00 What Makes Art Queer? 4:21 Drag 8:00 Gender Affirming 13:26 Liberation 19:30 Commodification 22:19 Critics and Policing 25:00 Harassment and Violence 32:17 Non-Queer Participants and Allies 34:49 Wrap Up Merch, Sweet Tees and stuff: https://culturally-fd-merchandise.creator-spring.com/ Support Culturally F'd: https://www.patreon.com/culturallyfd Listen in on TEMPO TALKS with Tempe O'Kun https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLIPk-itLl1jPyIK2c7mK-LpbvfDNqfcSW Check out Tempe O'Kun's books "Sixes Wild" and "Windfall" here: http://furplanet.com/shop/?affillink=YOUTU2907 Here's a playlist of his other Culturally F'd videos: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLIPk-itLl1jPS7tnT4hdJwBI-CeLF8Kb_

TigerTails Radio Season 16 Episode 00. Join the Discord Chat: https://discord.gg/SQ5QuRf Join the Telegram Chat: https://t.me/+yold2C77m0I1MmM0 Visit the website at http://www.tigertailsradio.co.uk. See website for full breakdown of any song credits, which is usually updated shortly after the show. Credits: Opening music: Magic by Hedge Haiden (Double Hedge Studios) Character art: Fitzroy Fox - https://www.furaffinity.net/user/lunara-toons / https://bsky.app/profile/fitzroyfox.bsky.social Background art: Charleston Rat - https://www.furaffinity.net/user/charlestonrat / https://bsky.app/profile/charlestonrat.bsky.social If you like what we do and wish to throw some pennies our way to support us, please consider sending a little tip our way. https://streamlabs.com/tigertailsradio/tip * Please note, tips are made to support TigerTails Radio and are assumed as made with good faith, so are therefore non-refundable. Thank you for your support and understanding.

The Majestic Wolf Runs

Flowers Bloom Along the Path

And Once Again Spring Beckons

Ōkami is one of the most unique games I’ve played and also one of the most interesting success stories. Odds are, if you’re like me, you’ll have seen Amaterasu the White Wolf around. She’s become a gaming icon of sorts and still shows up at times in games like Marvel vs Capcom. . And yet, she seems like an enigma as unlike Ryu or Chris Redfield, her story isn’t as widely known.

Ōkami was developed by Clover Studio, and released in 2006 for the PS2. Formed by Capcom R&D veterans, Clover Studios' other notable work was adapting Viewtiful Joe for PlayStation 2 and developing its sequel for both PS2 and GameCube. They created only two original works: Ōkami and their last game God Hand. While both were interesting concepts, neither were considered financial successes as they didn’t sell as well as Capcoms more well known franchises. To be fair, Resident Evil 4, which released just a year earlier, set the bar at an unprecedented high which a new IP was probably not gonna come even close to. Despite all that, Ōkami received critical acclaim, nearly around a 9/10 universally at every notable publication. A lot of people noted how Okami’s unique gameplay seemed especially suited to Nintendo’s Wii and DS systems, both of which were very new at the time. The clamor was enough that Ōkami did get a well received port to Wii and while it wasn’t ported to the DS, that system got Ōkamiden, a spiritual successor. The game was later ported to modern consoles in an HD release that has gone on to perform pretty well. The love for Ōkami was still strong and with the 2024 Game Awards shocking announcement of Ōkami 2, now seems like a good time to take a look at this beloved classic.

Greetings, Papabear,

I've written to you before on different issues. This time, however, is a lot more serious. Early in the morning on January 7th one of my best friends passed away in a sudden and severe house fire. There is still an active investigation on the scene. She, her mother, and her father are all believed to be dead. The night before, neighbors reported hearing possible gunshots. Her father was not a very good person; me and my friends suspect he caused whatever started the fire.

This question doesn't have much to do with the fandom, and I apologize. But how do I go forward from this? I can't focus at school, Grief counselors have been pulling me every week; I feel sick when I eat; and I can't sleep.

What do I do? I can't continue normally, and I don't know how to start doing so when every thought is about her.

Thank you,
Floppy

* * *

Dear Floppy,

This will probably involve more than one correspondence. Firstly, my condolences for your loss. What a tragic thing to happen. 

I have a couple of questions for you, if you don't mind. First of all, what do you mean you "believe" that your friend and her parents are dead? Were bodies not discovered? Is there a chance she is still alive and simply fled? This happened 9 days ago, so surely their fates should be known by now. Secondly, do you know whether a police investigation is ongoing? And do you have any newspaper or online stories on this incident you could forward to me? Finally, what does "counselors have been pulling me" mean? I'm unfamiliar with the use of "pulling" in that context. Do you mean you have been talking to counselors weekly?

At the moment, without these answers, I don't feel I can give you an accurate response, but my first impression is that there are a lot of things hanging in the air unanswered. And one thing that can help you is knowing the answers, which can provide a step going forward towards what they often call "closure." 

Let's talk some more soon. 

Bear Hugs,
Papabear

* * *

Greetings, Papabear,

My family was directly informed on her passing; however, they have not released the names to the general public, and because we aren't direct relatives, we haven't been given a "for sure" answer about her parents, only her. Its pretty obvious at this point that her parents are gone as well, and anyone close to her has come to this conclusion.

We recently had a big snow event in Alabama, and it has slowed down the investigation.

Cause of death has not been released to the public, and my mom hasn't been informed on any changes. The investigation is still active/ongoing.

Counselors have been taking me out of class in school weekly (sometimes days on end) to question me or just sit with me.

Floppy

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Hi, Floppy,

Thank you for the quick reply. I don't know what the counselors have been telling you, but here is my take on it as someone who has also faced the sudden and unexpected loss of someone close to them.

1) As I said previously, it will help you some to know, once the investigation is done, what exactly happened. When someone dies suddenly, it can provoke feelings of anxiety if you don't find answers because we, as humans, want to understand why horrible things happen. It helps us make a little sense of the tragedy and eases our upset.
2) Did you have any unresolved feelings or concerns between you and your friend? Things you wish you had said but now can never say to her? If so, it may help you a lot to write them down in a journal or to express those feelings to someone you trust. It really does help to release those things in actual words and not bottle them up inside.
3) If there is a memorial service and/or funeral, I encourage you to attend. Ceremonies help us to find release through closure as well.
4) You might also have your own private ceremony. Just you and your friend who is now in spirit. Go somewhere private. Take a photo with you of your departed friend. And talk to her one on one. Another ceremony I think is nice is to get a helium balloon from a local store, write a note of goodbye, tie it to the balloon, and release it to Heaven.
5) If you are a religious person, talk to your minister or priest or other spiritual leader.
6) Did you have shared friends? You might get them together and share your memories of your friend together and give each other hugs.
7) Allow yourself to cry.
8) Allow yourself to get angry.
9) Allow yourself to feel depressed.
10) DO NOT listen to people who say things like "Get over it," "When are you going to stop being depressed?" "They are in a better place now" (a horrible thing to tell a grieving person) or other such cliches. There is no time limit on grief. Grieve in your own time and, slowly, you will feel better on your own time schedule, NOT someone else's. I mean, it has been not even 10 days. You're allowed to be sad and to have a hard time focusing on daily activities. THIS IS NORMAL. So don't freak out about it. Remember, having "closure" is not the same as having open-ended grief. When I say "closure" I mean that you have come to terms with the fact that someone is now gone, but you will always carry a little sadness in your heart and that can last for years or even a lifetime, but it will ease over time to a bearable level.
11) Do not neglect your health. Eat normally, get rest, and exercise. Taking care of your body will also help in taking care of your mental and emotional health. The three are tied together. As part of this, do not indulge in drugs, booze, or overeating bad food. My sister dealt with grief with booze and now she is an alcoholic. Not good!
12) Seek an ongoing support group. Don't isolate yourself. Seek comfort in the friends and family who are still with you. Tell them they don't have to give you advice (indeed, people often feel pressured that they have to advise you, and they don't know what to say, which can just make things awkward), just hugs are enough and listening to you. 
13) Allow yourself to experience little pleasures in life that cheer you, whatever those might be. Don't feel guilty if you experience moments of joy and pleasure. It's okay.

You have me, too. I know what you are going through and you can write me any time, Lily.

I hope this helps.

Bear Hugs,
Papabear

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