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Sorry for the random post, but I'll like to say that this community is real awesome. I've been a lurker here for 2 years, but chose an alternate account since I'm a closet furry. Though I hope this whole thing isn't a social taboo in the future. Anyway, thanks for reading! You guys are awesome.

submitted by PM_ME_WISE_ADVICE
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submitted by NoahGoldFox
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There are some real shitheads out there, part of the reason I'm happy to be in this furry community is because of how friendly and kind you all are. Don't ever let someone put you down for what you like, feel or think. This world is a cruel place, so it's good to stop for a moment and realize what a good, sweet personality you all have. Even though I'm more of a lurker, you're a good bunch who usually tend to put a smile on my face. I'd feel silly saying this in any other sub but this one, honestly. Keep being you.

submitted by HighSlyFoxGuy
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submitted by Valkofox
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submitted by Xunsu
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Furry is still young, but we’re all getting older, year by year.

Doug Winger’s death from emphysema last week was notable not only for his cherished and unique contributions to furry, but also for the fact he died from an age-related illness. In this he is, as he always seemed to be, ahead of the curve.

Furry and furries are ageing. In the coming years and decades, age-related illnesses and deaths will cease being rare or notable. If furry became a unique phenomenon somewhere around the late 1970s, then the young adults who founded the fledgling community are well on their way to becoming senior citizens.

Doug Winger, at 62 years old, died young. He was a couple of decades younger than the average life expectancy for an American male. He isn’t the first high-profile furry to die of an age-related illness, but he’s one of only a handful.

If we look at some of the (living) high-profile founding members of furry, we can get an idea of the upper end of the furry age spectrum:

• Fred Patten is 74
• Mark Merlino is 62
• Rod O’Riley is 50
• Reed Waller is 65

Your humble correspondent, for the record, is 40.

Forty is about the age where the likely cause of death changes from misadventure or suicide, to heart disease or cancer. It is also, traditionally, the point at which someone might have a mid-life crisis.

A mid-life crisis is essentially a mortality crisis, and you can enjoy one at whatever age suits you. It can occur once you are emotionally mature enough to understand that life is short and death is inevitable. It might be helped along by a reminder of death: perhaps the slow failing of your own body, perhaps the news of the death of a member of your community.

A mortality crisis, at mid-life or elsewhere, is not necessarily a bad thing. I’d argue that it is usually a good thing, although of course this depends on the person. An older person might try to reclaim their youth, perhaps by buying a sportscar and running off with the secretary (the bad version), or maybe by finding a new enjoyment in life on the basis that it’s fleeting (the good version). The good versions are much more common than the bad versions, but of course you tend not to hear about them.

I’ll give you an example of a good mortality crisis: a furry friend of mine, upon reaching midlife, realised that good physical health isn’t permanent. He had always liked the idea of gaining serious amounts of muscle, and figured that it was now or never. Fast-forward a few years and he’s deadlifting some 400 lbs, is feeling much happier with himself (and has undoubtedly picked up a few admirers along the way).

Life is, essentially, a struggle. It’s not realistic to expect to be able to snap your fingers and change, and it’s very easy to float along without really asserting yourself on the world around you. A mortality crisis, for many people, is a helpful force.

We furries are lucky, because our community is diverse enough to include both young and old. It used to be that way for all humans, until the industrial revolution came along and we started to congregate in big cities. Now, most people create communities of peers, meaning that as they age they hang around an extended group of friends from their school or university days. This means that their peer groups tend to be monocultural: same socio-economic background, same beliefs, same age.

There is a lot of research showing the extent to which we are influenced by our friends. Famously, we are much more likely to be overweight if our friends are overweight. In a monocultural peer group, it’s easy enough to imagine how this might happen, and this is confirmed by the research: we copy our friends’ habits and lifestyle. It’s difficult to be the outlier, and so we tend to regress towards our peer group’s mean.

I’d argue that a monocultural peer group inhibits personal growth, because such a group innately lacks heroes and role models. If everyone is at around the same level, there is limited peer-group influence to improve. And a lack of exposure to different age groups is also limiting: those without young friends may fail to understand the struggles that young people can face, and those without old friends may never learn to approach death in a positive way.

In a group where everyone is the same age, everyone starts to suffer from age-related illnesses at around the same time. If members of the group haven’t been exposed to ageing and death to any significant extent, then they may lack the resources to manage their new exposure to mortality. This can lead to the bad, running-away sort of mid-life crisis, as well as creating a whole bunch of other personal challenges.

We furries are, collectively, exposed to age-related illnesses through the older members of our community. Doug Winger’s death is in no way a good thing, but the inevitability of some furry community death is a good thing, at least because we are exposed to death’s realities and inevitability.

Doug’s art, for better or for worse, couldn’t fail but touch anyone who saw it. For most of us, this is the only relationship we had with him: completely impersonal and one-sided. For us, his death serves a useful function, in that it reminds us of the value of our community, that we all get to spend exactly one year at every age, that we are the oldest we have ever been right now, and that we will never again be younger than we are right now.

For those who knew Doug personally, I’m sure I speak for everyone when I say that I’m sorry for your loss. We understand that your life has irrevocably changed, and changed for the worse. And we understand that we, too, will eventually also lose our loved ones. We promise to make the most of the short time we have.

Vale Doug Winger.

submitted by CeresSergal
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submitted by MasqueRaccoon
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submitted by Dukurow
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submitted by Verok_the_Dragon
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Dear Papabear,

Let me first off say this is my second time writing this letter because my browser crashed and I had to start all over so here I go...

I have two friends that are apart of this "little" story, lets just call them "Jadon" and "Colin." I have known Jadon for about 2-3 years and the same goes for Colin. Note that Jadon is my closest friend 2nd to Colin and I trusted him for many things. I trusted Jadon with one of my closest secrets (because I was so tired of being "stuck in the closet"). Last summer me and Jadon were on steam chatting and I figured since we were close I told him something that bothered me for a long time that I never told ANYONE else. I told him that I "liked" horses and was into bestiality at that time and only WATCHED VIDEOS of it, (I stayed away from bigger animals and never really did anything with them) I then start telling him that it was like a drug for me and I didn't ask to be this way. Surprisingly, he tells me that you can't just bottle it up inside and all I am thinking is "wow, this guy is actually giving me a chance!" Cool right? No, bad decision because next thing I know he starts sending me all this pony crap (that I do not like) I guess because he was messing with me. He was making false assumptions, a lot of them.

After coming home from my high school me and him decide to skype and then I start bleaching like a goat and he did the same back (for some odd reason) and this keeps going for a while. One day I went so far as of to ask him to baa like a sheep; he just kept asking why so I hanged up (feeling as if I made the situation odd enough). I solemnly regret taking such a long shot. Everything is alright so far, right?

*fast forward to the middle of the school year*

I am at high school and it's time for lunch so I start waiting in line like any other "normal" guy and then suddenly my heart drops and shatters into a million pieces. Three guys are baa-ing like sheeps and laughing at me, people (around 20) were just staring at me (only me) weirdly, I felt like crying. I just wanted to try and be another guy in the crowd. Them out of nowhere all this anger and hatred surges within the bare fabrics of my soul. It was not because of the people that laughed at me or the fact that those stupid juniors were obviously making fun of me, It was because I just realized I got fucking stabbed in the back. (I am a freshman)

I then preceded to go home and blow off steam by breaking fences with my legs (of course where no one could see me) and it felt pretty damn good. I then confronted Jadon and asked him if he told anything about what I told him (the only guy I told) to which he said vaguely, "noooooooooooo". I chose to end the call and thought "fuck it". Then the guy (Jadon) starts conversations talking shit about furries and saying how they should "kill themselves" and how they are "gross" while I also skype with said Colin. I assumes he knows I have a secret affection for the furry community, it's just that Colin doesn't know (hopefully) and goes along with Jadon's crap so I don't really say anything...

I can't call Jadon on it because I have no physical evidence of him saying anything about what I told him. If he did "let the cat out of the bag" then that ass caused me a lot of pain and humiliation. We all still talk to each other as if this didn't even happen but it still bothers me because I have been bottling up these feelings.

He is a red-headed ginger who has a lot of time on his hands (maybe even more then me) and can easily be taken down, excluding the fact that he has a gorilla for a brother who is ALOT stronger then me. I don't want to be anyone's clown.

Should I just cut the cord with this guy?

With love,

Derik (age 16)

* * *

Dear Derik,

If Jadon was the only person you told your secret too, one must conclude, logically, that Jadon told the other people at school. This is backed up by the bleating he and the others were doing. Clearly, by sending you pony stuff etc., he was mocking you. You might ask, then, why would a friend do this? Probably because you made him uncomfortable by revealing your horse fantasy. One way that immature people cope with discomfort is by mocking the source of that discomfort.

Before you ditch Jadon, if I were you I would talk to him and explain to him how much he hurt your feelings. Don’t dance around the issue by asking him if he told others. You know he told others, so don’t let him get away with denying it. Tell him that you realize you made him very uncomfortable and you’re sorry about that, and ask him if he feels he can get over this. If he can’t, your friendship really is not going to survive. But, if he can be more mature about it and not make it a subject of gossip and mockery, then you can possibly still be friends. He has to realize, though, that he violated a very deep trust and that this is going to take some work to heal so that you can forgive him.

This is kind of a dicey situation because I don’t think Jadon is emotionally mature enough to want to commit to working on a friendship. He’s likely still in the phase where he craves his peers’ approval and is worried about how others perceive him (a phase a lot of people never grow out of). You see, his telling others was a way for him to distance himself from you and your secret so that others would not associate him with that secret and think he was into horses (or whatever), too. In other words, he showed that he cared more about what others thought than your friendship. That is a big sign of a lack of character on his part.

I don’t actually hold out much hope for Jadon, especially after he trashed furries. Does Jadon know Colin well? Do you think Colin can take this news? That’s the next thing you need to find out.

In the end, if Jadon is unrepentant about his actions (or denies the obvious and won’t own up to what he has done to you), if I were you I would not consider him a friend anymore. Have enough self-respect to stand up for yourself and not be insulted and betrayed by someone and allow it to slide. Clinging to the friendship of a hater will just wither your spirit, and no one needs that.

Consider this a lesson learned in how to determine who is your real friend and who is not. It’s a hard lesson, but an important one.

Hugs,

Papabear

In November 2014, I shared news about the very active Furry author Tempe O’kun.  Public Radio interviewed him about his writing – and they treated Furry writing as just a genre, not a “weird news” item.  Even the romance kind!  That was refreshing, and I thought he did a great job representing it.  So do other furries, […]

submitted by Zoepapillon
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submitted by TwigCreator
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Welcome back to another art prompt thread! It's great to see the first one was so successful. Remember that submissions of any skill level are welcomed, and feel free to ask for critique if you'd like to improve.

This week's theme is Your fursona in uniform. What uniform? Up to you! Is your fursona a firefighter? hot A police officer? A businessman? An athlete? Show us!

As an aside, the mods may be setting up AutoModerator to post these automatically in the future. All depends on whether I can get a list of a dozen or so prompts to submit. Feel free to suggest any!

submitted by CeresSergal
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submitted by Xunsu
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submitted by KibaMonster
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ok because I've finished college for this year I've decided to make flairs for anyone who wants them and other artists you can join in as well. here's a reference of my art style. References it can be text or a drawing I don't mind.

submitted by Bod9001
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submitted by Lucarios_Butt
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