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Stepfather from Hell
This is my first time writing to you and thought it would be a good way to help with current turmoil that I am going through in my life.
The past school semester I told my mate that my stepfather had raped me when I was only 15, I am 20 now and the following happened after that night.
He told my mother, with my blessing, what happened to me 5 years ago and through a teary phone call she finally decides to divorce my father. Upon moving back home for the summer my stepfather openly shows aggression over my failed semester, demeaning me through shouting and profanity, taking away my house keys and kicking me out of the house when no one is home. It was to a point that I was scared for my life for when my father gets served the papers. I spoke with my mother of my fears and asked to live with my mate for a couple of days for when he cools down. After said time I get a phone call that I’m not even allowed to come home until the divorce is settled, orders of my father.
So now its been 4 months and he’s destroyed my sisters bedroom and was arrested, yet my mother bails him out and after my visit to drop off two kittens I had saved from the streets and adopted for her to take care of until we move to a pet friendly environment, lets him back in the house and even though she promised to take care of them, she lets him take my kittens away to an animal shelter behind my back. I'm still recovering from that heartache of my lost kittens that I've cared and invested over 600$ on them in vet bills and surgery. Currently I'm still living with my mate who is, so far providing my missing emotional and financial support, he works hard and I love him so, but I cant help but feel like a burden to him. He seems to be the only one I can trust anymore.
My question to you is, are there better times ahead even for one like me or are things going to continue going down hill?
Accalia
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Dear Accalia,
I predict your life will improve, but only if you are able to cut this man completely out of your life, as well as from your mother’s. Do not go to this house (unless it is to rescue your mom) at all. Stay away from this piece of human filth.
Okay a number of thins to cover here. First of all, your mother needs to get away from this man, if at all possible, even before any divorce papers are served, especially since your stepfather seems unstable and violent. She needs to contact a relative or friend and move in with them. Period. If he gets nasty, she can file a restraining order. Your mother is exhibiting some classic codependent traits, such as continuing to help this man (bailing him out, obeying his wishes to get rid of the cats) even though he has been violent to both you and your sister. You need to try and pull as many family members into this as possible so you can work together to convince her to get away from this criminal and loser as soon as possible.
Both you and your mom need to seek attorneys: she for the divorce (I guess she has done this?), and you to explore litigation against him for raping you (there is no statute of limitations on rape, so you can still sue him). It is good you have some support from your mom (she needs to be more on your side, though) and mate, but you might also consider some counseling. Start researching lawyers, looking for those who offer free initial consultations and are willing to take a percentage of settlements as payment.
It sounds like your sister might need to do some of the above, too. You only mention her in passing, but sounds like she is at risk as well.
Speaking of your mate, I’m glad you have someone supportive in your life. Don’t feel guilty about staying with him. That is what mates are for. But do try and do whatever you can to help him. If you can’t work or help financially, then cook him meals, clean his apartment, run his errands and do what you can to make his life easier.
I’m so sorry about your cats, but it just proves my point that you should in no shape or form have anything to do with your stepfather. Don’t talk to him, don’t see him, don’t go in the house where he lives, even if he is not there. Stay with your mate and work on litigation against him.
Papabear hopes you and your mother will be okay, and I hope you can convince her to get out NOW. Not tomorrow, not next week, NOW. Once you press the Delete button on his ass, your life will improve immeasurably.
Be safe. Bear hugs.
Papabear
August 2012 Newsbytes archive
Should I Submit My Gay Furry Novel For My Creative Writing College Class?
It is in no way pornographic. Just romantic along the lines of Associated Student Bodies. Should I do it reddit or go with some other ideas I have? ((This coming from the kid who wears his tail and collar and jacket with Furry pins to college all the time.))
submitted by Hemms3[link] [4 comments]
A few questions I've cooked up over the years for the furry community
I apologize if my tone seems damning at times. I assure you these are legitimate questions and warn that they may contain sweeping generalizations as a result of my relatively low sample size. Please pardon these instances.
- Do you feel like certain parts of the animal kingdom are terribly underrepresented? Whenever I look at pictures of several hundred people in fursuits at a convention, it seems like it essentially amounts to cats and dogs. Some of my favorite animals—elephants, mongooses, giraffes, ducks, frogs, rats, raccoons—I rarely see, if ever. I realize not all of those are furry, but as I understand it the term doesn't necessitate furry animals and is more a colloquialism. I notice there's "scalies" at least, which I suppose covers another favorite of mine: crocodiles.
- Why is there so little special variance? It seems like many furry people do not care to elaborate on specifics. I don't read many furry profiles, but looking at the fursuits it just seems to be a whole lot of "generic wolf". Sure, there are different colors, but by my observations it essentially amounts to a palette swap, which means nothing.
- I clicked around a bit and noticed some people do go for the more realistic fursuits, but why do the majority seem to go for the goofy ones? Is it because they actually are shooting for the feel of being in a cartoon, or do they actually feel the cross-eyed rainbow dogs are legitimate choices for a serious fursona? (I have made the exception in my mind for those who revel in the goofiness.)
[link] [33 comments]
Hello Kitty! Have Some Art!
Think of your favorite so-cute-it-hurts art meme, and chances are at some point it was inspired by the success of Sanrio’s Hello Kitty line. The little white cat with tiny black eyes (first designed in 1974 by Yuko Shimizu) has become a billion-dollar yearly world phenomenon since first breaking out of Japan in 1976. Now, this October Abrams will bring us Hello Kitty, Hello Art!, a hardcover collection of kitty-inspired illustration. “Hello Kitty, Hello Art! is a celebration of the iconic Hello Kitty character and other beloved Sanrio characters through the eyes of dozens of contemporary artists and Hello Kitty fans, including Gary Baseman, Ron English, Luke Chueh, CRASH, Anthony Lister, Eric Joyner, Camilla d’Errico, Amanda Visell, Colin Christian, Huck Gee, Luke Chueh, Deph, and Yosuke Ueno, among others. This hardcover collectible book features a variety of well-known international artists and their unique interpretations of Sanrio characters in various media, including canvas, spray paint, watercolor and ink, aerosol and acrylics on wood, mixed media, oil on panel, and silk screen. The pieces in the book reflect the many ways Hello Kitty and Sanrio have influenced and inspired so many artists around the world.” Pre-order it on Amazon.
image c. 2012 Abrams
What would your fursona be if it was based on your family and/or location?
People always make fursonas based on what represents them or what they like. But if your species was based off your family and origins. What would it be?
My fursona is a silver furred red fox. But since my parents were from the Philippines. My options would've been. Some Carabao or monkey. Maybe a mutt. Monkey eating eagle? I'd go for the mutt.
submitted by VentKazemaru[link] [27 comments]
FC-96 Honey We Lost The Packets
/R/ing Good Fox Wallpapers :3
Requesting cool/awesome/hot fox wallpapers. Preferably SFW pl0x B3 My res is 1280x800 but any other wallpaper size should work X3
submitted by XiamTheFox[link] [9 comments]
If only there was a place I could buy clip-on tails and other types of "Feral Apparel"... Oh wait, AnthroWear!
We are a new business specializing in hand-made tails, ears, and other related "Feral Apparel". We're hoping to connect with the Furry Community (and Furry-Allies too of course!). Check us out at www.anthrowear.webs.com and like us on Facebook and Twitter. To celebrate our grand opening, every 20 Likes on our Facebook page will result in a random drawing and a winner of a free Lombax Tail ($24.99 value) or 50% off a Wild Cat Tail ($33.99 value) of your choice! Also, once a week we will have "Free Tail Fridays" where a random winner will win a Lombax Tail!
submitted by AnthroWear[link] [6 comments]
Taking reddit requests!
Reply with a ref sheet or image of your character, and if it interests me I'll draw it. :) Yes, for FREE. Might just be a sketch, or might be a full-color headshot, depends on my mood/the character. Just getting some practice in before larger projects.
Disclaimer: Please do not be offended if I do not choose your character, or if your drawing doesn't come out as you expect/hope. This is free! :D
Extra note: I have 3 slots open for neon paper single character commissions this weekend, $10 each (more in my gallery, take a look). And if you buy a slot, you're put in a raffle to win an extra, free sketch (so, that's a 1 in 3 chance of winning. Woo!).
Oh, final note: "SFW" art only! Thanks!
Edit: I'm dumping completed requests in here: http://imgur.com/a/7Qfyf
submitted by StrawburryMiwk[link] [47 comments]
[NSFW] Drawing fur
I want to try something new and finish this (nswf) entirely in fur.
Does anyone have some good examples of decent looking/ realistic fur?
submitted by Kari_Fenrir[link] [4 comments]
A True Christian Mom Writes to Papabear
I am not a furry, or homosexual, but my 17 year old son is. I accept him for who he is and we do not have any problems that I am aware of. I am writing to thank you for doing what you do. It breaks my heart to read about the issues these kids have to deal with and most of the time without the support that they should have. My family was raised to be Christian, the judge not lest ye be judged type. When my son came out about his orientation he was terrified by the stories that he heard online about being disowned and abandoned. Looking back now it was funny, he had been beating around the bush for 3 months. We all knew there was something bothering him but he wouldn't tell us. His grandmother had mentioned to me that she thought he might be gay and when he started acting up again I just came out and asked him. When he gasped "yes" I told him it was no big deal and went back to my game. He said it was the most anticlimactic moment of his life.
Anyway I wish I could put my arms around all the people who write to you and give them a big hug. I am so glad that you are here to tell them that there is someone who cares and accepts them for who they are not what they are. You are truly a blessing not only to the writers of these letters, but to me as well.
Well my question is would I be welcomed to comment? I don't want to offend your readers who may think I'm intruding. I haven't experienced the problems that they have to deal with on the level that they have, but I have had to deal with rejection from both my friends and family. You have provided a wonderful forum for a select group of people to find acceptance, yet I don't meet the requirements. That's why I'm asking for your permission. I hope to hear from you when you have a moment. Thank you again and take care.
Dorothy Bogdan
* * *
Dear Dorothy,
Thank you so much for your lovely letter! You really made Papabear’s day! There have been a number of letters that I have received from readers who were concerned about talking openly with their religious families about being gay or furry or both, and, sadly, in most of those cases I have had to advise them to keep things under wraps until they were no longer dependent on those families for fear they might be tossed out of the house, homeless and penniless.
You, dear madam, on the other hand, are an outstanding representative of what Papabear calls a “true Christian,” as well as a model parent. You care about and love your son no matter what. Why this is so difficult for many parents, I just don’t know, and it makes me sad. I am printing your letter here as an example to all these narrow-minded families what family should be all about.
God bless you and then some!
Now, as to your question of whether nonfurries can write to me. Yes, yes they can. Many of the letters I get are not really about furry issues, so you don’t necessarily have to be one. The reason I started the column and aimed it at the furry community was that I wanted them all to know there was a place they could safely go where they would not be hated for being furry (or gay, or for having kinks, or for being “weird” by society’s definition) because I was one of them.
If you have something to talk about that will benefit my readers, then I will publish it and respond to it like any other letter. Furries, unlike many outside the community of furries, are an inclusive group. We welcome you, whether you are a furry or someone who is not a furry but is friendly to us.
Hugs and Big Bear Kisses,
Papabear
Save a wuff from freezing! My Iron Artist challenge is UP!
My FA Journal has the particulars. Thanks, all you snugglefluffs!
submitted by siskmarek[link] [5 comments]
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