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Furry's Mother Is Threatening His Boyfriend
I'm having a serious problem. It all started Jan 2, 2013 (it "started" earlier, but the problem itself was on the second).
I was painting the bathroom in our 2/2 bed/bath apartment, living with my Mom and Sister, as well as my nephew (sister's kid).
My sister, seeing that I had been maniacally texting a friend, decided to invade my phone, looking at my inbox.
Normally I don't text much, but I had recently garnered a friendship with a guy in PA (me being in CA).
My sister, seeing the stuff I had been texting my friend (Roleplaying, and he's been helping me accept being gay, and was answering my questions...) and jacked my phone, showing the messages to my mother later that night.
At the same time my mother was looking at my phone, she told me to remove the password on my computer, in order for her to look at the files I had on it, look at my email, and my facebook. Needless to say, she saw my limited yiff collection, but she was completely incensed that my friend was ripping folders of yiff and emailing them to me. Me being seventeen, and him being over eighteen, my mother was completely pissed.
She had threatened to report him to the authorities, but I couldn't bear the thought of sending him to jail on account of my "stupidity," as I told her that same night.
She offered me a one-sided ultimatum. If I never texted, never emailed, never facebooked him, and never called him, as well as never went ANYWHERE NEAR Pennsylvania, she would never report him... Needless to say I cried a lot during that final night in which she allowed me to text him goodbye.
What can I do? I'm still heart broken, I'm having fantasies and dreams of killing my mother and sister (although I'm not so stupid as to actually act on them), and I am despondent during the days, pouring over my reading books and listening to Audioslave, Three Days Grace, and a limited selection of 3 Doors Down...
I feel like I'm breaking apart, I don't know what I can do now.
What can I do?
Drake Wolfe
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Hi, Drake,
How close are you to being 18? Once that happens, your bf in PA is not guilty of anything.
Papabear
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My bday is March 2. Cant she still get him reported and sent to jail, even if i am 18 and move to PA?
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If you are both 18 and of legal age, he has not done anything illegal, so, no, she can't get him in legal trouble. You are both adults at that point. She CAN refuse to financially support you, she CAN kick you out of her house, but only after you are 18, which is when she is no longer obligated by law to support you. She can't throw you or your bf in jail.
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The police can't hold the yiff he sent me wen i was 17 against him at that point?
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Teenagers looking at porn is not unusual. As long as the porn does not involve underage individuals, I would say you are fine. I would, if I were you, simply lay low for a few months until your birthday. If it makes you feel better, delete the porn on your computer. Be advised I am not an attorney, so if you are REALLY concerned, you might seek one out, but the two of you have not had sex, and there is no law I know of that teenagers flirting with each other, even if you are gay. Furthermore, he is in PA, where the age of consent is 16, not 18. I don't know what the laws are regarding interstate flirtations, but one argument is that you can't exactly have sex when you are on opposite sides of the country.
My advice would be to keep things on the back burner until you're 18. Your mother, it seems, is trying to take advantage of your ignorance of the law to threaten and control you; either that, or she is ignorant of the law herself, which is also quite possible.
ALSO, since there is only 1 year's difference between the two of you, in California the law states that if the age difference is fewer than 3 years, then the WORST he can be charged with is a misdemeanor, and no one gets thrown in prison for a misdemeanor. (See this link: http://www.leginfo.ca.gov/cgi-bin/displaycode?section=pen&group=00001-01000&file=261-269).
Stay calm, you'll be fine. Hugs.
Papabear
P.S. Never really a good idea to exchange naked pics on the Internet; you never know where they will end up.
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Would it change anything if he sent me a shirtless pic of himself, to ask if he was my type, and I sent a shirtless one back, searching for confirmation that I was not ugly/to gain more confidence in my body?
What I look at does not involve underage individuals; I mostly look at Jay Naylor, Meesh, Redrusker, etc. on Furaffinity and Tumblr.
If I could know FOR SURE that I can move to Pennsylvania after I turn 18 and get out of High School, without fearing my mother's retribution for doing so in the form of reporting him and screwing with his life, that will make my remaining six months in this pit much brighter...
Thanks for talking to me.
* * *
I really don't know the fine-point legalities, but a shirtless picture of a male is not porn. You see it at the beach and by the pool any day of the year. Again, the worst that could happen would be a misdeamenor, but I find that HIGHLY HIGHLY unlikely. Also, he's in a different state and the charge would be in California, and I really doubt that anything will come of it. Like I said, for now, stop sending pics back and forth, just to be careful. Play it smart.
Papabear
* * *
Alright, thank you so much for helping me feel more comfortable with this situation. I've found a friend, Alex, who is looking into the "fine-point legalities," since he wants to become a lawyer, this could be a good start for him.
Thank You.
Drake
Opinions: Interviews at FWA
If you're attending/planning to attend/know someone who is planning to attend FWA, this is for you:
I work for a small radio station in my free time am considering applying for press credentials to get into the con. Since I have to actually do something with said credentials I'd like to see if anyone would be open to doing a short interview with me. I'm primarily concerned with public perception of the fandom (news, TV shows, video games, etc.) and your opinion on the popular misconceptions they portray of us as well as your personal stories regarding the fandom (i.e. how you knew you were a furry, the impact the fandom has had on you, and the like).
You may notice I said "US" in that last paragraph; that's because I've been a part of the fandom for almost three years now myself. I figure that giving furries some exposure through a non-furry affiliate while being in total control of said exposure as a member of the fandom could do us a little bit of good in the public eye. At worst it goes unnoticed and I just manage to get in for free. xD
Bear in mind this is completely non-committal; commenting on this post in no way requires you to actually conduct an interview. To be frank, getting a press pass is a pain in the ass and I want to make sure I can actually use it before I go through the trouble. I've got about a month left to complete the process so your feedback is valuable in making a decision. Anyone interested?
TL;DR: Going to FWA; want to get in free as press. Want to know if you could be interviewed so pass can be secured.
submitted by Kamiyama91[link] [16 comments]
Episode 72 – Literati - It’s time for Episode 72, and we have good news and bad news. Good news: Kyo is back, yay! And he even has a report on his trip to Virgina – and New York, with its tiny tiny apartments, as it turns out – to [...]
It’s time for Episode 72, and we have good news and bad news. Good news: Kyo is back, yay! And he even has a report on his trip to Virgina – and New York, with its tiny tiny apartments, as it turns out – to share with everyone! The bad news is, Istanbul is dead. Well, dying. At least he sure sounds like it. Sorry about the coughing over this week’s episode; action is being taken to fix this! Anyway, the entire episode starts off with original musical content generated by the cast – yes, more of it – and goes on to introduce Railrunner, Smokey’s cousin who is a train fan and a ‘foamer’! Istanbul talks about the new generation of Pokemon slated to release later this year and gives this week’s Istanbul’s Words That Sound Dirty But Aren’t, and Halfwit…well, she can’t remember what she was going to talk about. Ah well!
Once the e-mails get going, we’ve got lots of author and book recommendations, suggestions on how to develop your plot and deal with writer’s block, and other things too: one listener has good luck with parents understanding his sexuality, while another isn’t sure if he should tell a parent at all. Two listeners write in about the very full year that 2012 was for them, and one listener asks for help in figuring out how to get away from a toxic home situation. Even the cast chimes in on the writing issue, since almost the entire cast either writes or has written at some point in their lives!
Next week’s topic is all about music! You know, that thing where you jam a bunch of noises together (and maybe some words) and it sounds all pretty. Write in and tell us what you like, who your favorite artists are, any songs you prefer, how music affects you…and hey, if you have any songs you’d like us to use for our music break, send ‘em on in! We’re always looking for more!
Music: Chrono Cross – Another Inspiration from OCRemix
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E-mail: fuzzy.logic.podcast@gmail.com
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Episode 72 – Literati
File modified January 14, 2013 – 79 MB – downloaded 457 times so far
Daily Show: January 14, 2013 - Who here likes jelly beans? It's Monday, so that means it's time to talk about a snack food the 'fin enjoys. Listen in as we discuss this sweet confection and list every single flavor produced by a certain famous jelly bean
Who here likes jelly beans? It’s Monday, so that means it’s time to talk about a snack food the ‘fin enjoys. Listen in as we discuss this sweet confection and list every single flavor produced by a certain famous jelly bean manufacturer.
Hosts: CrimsonX, Levi, Murphy, Wolfin
Podcast image by TschiAe
LondonFurs, bloody good!
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New Stickers for FC 2013!
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Trans Furry Has Gained a Unique Perspective on the Fandom
I've recently come out in my real-life as a trans man, and while not facing complete acceptance, it's going well enough that I am being accepted as a man by at the very least my friends. That's not why I'm here.
Now that I am being viewed as a man in the furry fandom as well, I've come to notice the treatment I got as a woman, which I originally assumed to just be infuriating quirks of less-than-stellar people in this fandom, were examples of misogyny--I don't have these problems if perceived to be a man. As someone long active in feminist circles, I recognize that I am now inheriting Male Privilege--and it's a daunting prospect. How can I continue my transition without grabbing handfuls of this privilege and, by extension, pissing on the women of the furry fandom?
Furnonymous
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Hi, Furnonymous,
Wow, what an awesome opportunity this is to get a rare and insightful look at the division of the sexes within the fandom. You are not the first furry to point out to me that females are sometimes treated differently than males within the fandom. It is a fact that there are fewer women in the fandom than men, and that most of these men are in their teens and twenties. A lot of them are gay, too, but that really shouldn’t matter when it comes to treating women with respect.
There are some female furry groups out there, like https://www.facebook.com/FemaleFurries on FB and http://furry4life.org/group/femalefurs on F4L, but both of those groups have fewer than 200 members apiece.
I really think it’s time this topic got more discussion. Perhaps have regular panels at conventions about female furries and the issues they might face in the fandom. Maybe some of my femmefur readers can chime in here on the topic, and I brought it up, too, to my friends at FurMedia and they said they would do a show on the subject.
To address your question more directly, I would first of all say that I think “misogyny” is a bit too harsh of a term. I don’t think male furries hate females, I think it is more a case of many of them being awkward and shy around females (the younger ones, mostly, but some older ones too, I hear). Now, you may have garnered some “male privilege” since your change, but you don’t have to use that in a negative sense. You have a remarkable opportunity here to be a liaison between the sexes in the fandom because you understand what it is like to straddle the gender gap. If you take on a role of advocate of female furries, you certainly won’t piss them off; I would think they’d appreciate it.
Try joining some women’s groups, like maybe the ones mentioned above, or maybe even create your own, and start a dialogue with the ladies of the fandom. I think that would be terrific, and it sounds like it is needed.
Good luck!
Papabear
S2 Episode 20 – Con Prep! Let’s Pack! - It's con time! What do you pack? What should you expect when you're there? What's the best way to have a good time without dying? We ask our special guest: YOU. Hosting solo due to extreme weather, Tugs plays your v
NOW LISTEN!
Show Notes
Check out the Biggest Little Fur Con at www.biggestlittlefurcon.org
Music & Breaks
Opening theme: Fredrik Miller – Cloud Fields (Radio Mix). USA: Bandcamp, 2011. Used with permission. (Buy a copy here – support your fellow furs!)
Main Segment: DJ Earworm - United State of Pop 2012. USA: Soundcloud, 2012. Check out DJ Earworm's site!
Listener mail segment: Eskadet – Back To Kyoto ; from the album “Solitudes” (Lemongrassmusic, 2010) - www.lemongrassmusic.de - Used under license.
Closing: Fredrik Miller – Cloud Fields (Chill Out Mix). USA: Bandcamp, 2011. Used with permission. (Buy a copy here – support your fellow furs!)
Special Thanks:
Anu Snow
Whitefang
Kache
Rhapsody
Kasstrick
Our two voicemail participants at the beginning of the show
Tycho & the BLFC Staff
Next Episode:
Don’t forget! FWIW Live! FC 2013 is coming! Please help us blow the doors off of FC on Friday at 1030pm at the Hilton’s Santa Clara I/II. Not only will we give a special prize to the first people in the door, but you’ll also be helping us give the con a reason to put us on the main stage next year! WOO! S2 Episode 20 – Con Prep! Let’s Pack! - It's con time! What do you pack? What should you expect when you're there? What's the best way to have a good time without dying? We ask our special guest: YOU. Hosting solo due to extreme weather, Tugs plays your v
![[link]](http://i.imgur.com/vE6pg.jpg){kind=link}