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Disclaimer: Hello. Its late, I'm on mobile, and this could wind up being lengthy as I let my mind wander. Forgive the grammar errors and such. I think just writing this down helps me feel a bit better. Also, sorry for being "that guy." No, this is not a 'coming out' thread.

Sometimes, the drama here in this sub especially and ocassionally in other fur-inhabited places keeps me up at night.

Threads like this or this or these really get to me, and make me feel upset or self-concious. I started to become a "real" fur very recently, about a couple weeks ago or so, and there has been a lot posted here since then. Most of it good, but its the drama that gets to me, and makes me upset pretty easily. Not offended, just upset. It makes me question about what I'm getting myself into, and if I am doing the "right" thing.

Coming into the fandom, I have assumed that furries are generally fun, bouncy people who are very supportive, kind and friendly. That is mostly true I've observed, but there are people here who just don't appear to be very pleased, for various reasons.

While I was making my fursona, I decided that a personality that matches what is great about furries as people (aforementioned friendly, playful, supportive, etc.) would be great! And so you have Ringgar, the Wolf (You can read more about him here.). There is also one thing that I try to do and so does he. I try to look at the positive things, and most importantly, make people's days and help sad people or furs be happy again. That can be hard to do with all the drama. There are a few people here also who just tend to be cynical or don't want to be happy. Now, I as a person, care for other people's feelings and emotions, even if they are strangers on the internet. I try to help make peopld feel better and look at the positive side of things. No one should have to be sad or upset.

Ringgar and I (only mentioning my sona because it fits the context, not because I believe I am litterally Ringgar, if anyone gets confused,) try to be the 'nice guys.'When other people are happy, we're happy, and vice versa. Drama here can keep me questioning myself, however, especially when looking through cynical threads. Am I being annoying? Is this what people really think about X and Y? Do my comments here piss people off? Am I really being accepted as a friend? Should I be concerned about X? Am I a "bad" furry? The list goes on and on. I really don't know the answer to such questions, and they keep me up at night. Meanwhile, I try to do my best to spread some furry cheer to those who need it most. (I do plan on getting a full suit of Ringgar too, and I hope I can spread joy just the same, just throwing this in here.) I think to myself sometimes about what I can do to help people be happy. I check in on watchers and people I've watched on FA sometimes, I try to keep my comments upbeat or caring and sympathetic, (as you can see from my comment history, if you bother to check,) but I keep questioning wether or not you guys are annoyed by all of this. I try to restrain myself as to not be antagonizing, either. And here I am, thinking to myself: Can't we just sit back, give hugs, and enjoy life as a fur? I know I try my best to, and help others too too. I let people confide in me, I'm good at keeping secrets and I am always willing to help people feel better, even if it means making a fool of myself, like a good mascot I suppose. Has anyone else felt the same way, or can offer some support?

Typing this did help me feel a little better, by the way. I know I've azked for some emotional support before, but you folks have been kind so far, thank you.

Edit: Thanks to all of you for your responses. From what I've been told so far, is that I can't help everyone be happy or make friends with everyone. This is kind of a harsh thing for me to deal with, but I'll make it through. I'm also being told that I don't have to involve myself in every issue in the fandom. It could only lead to self-hatred.

It's late here, I'm going to bed. Any further responses I'll reply to in the morning. Thanks for everyones support, again. I'm feeling a bit better now.

Edit 2: Thanks to everyone for your support, I feel a lot better now! It looks like all I have to do is take things slow and just stick with what I'm comfortable with. You are all so kind, yet again! Expect me to return the kindess in the future. Thank you all!

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I find other peoples fantasies interesting...

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Papabear,

I'm not really asking a question about the fandom, but for about two years now I have identified that I am both bi and mtf transsexual. I live in a relatively conservative area in Colorado and I'm nervous about the position I'm in. I'd have a hard time with both because every time I tell my parents something they say it's just a phase and all that. Every damn time, they say that. They also raised me to believe that you shouldn't change yourself. My parents are also Christian, not devout, though. I'm really in a pinch here because I know that I am bi and trans, but no one, save for a few friends I met online, knows about it. I really wonder what I should do and when (and where) I should tell my parents and friends.

Krystaline (age 15)

* * * 

Dear Krystaline,

Thank you for your letter; you do not have to write about a furry issue for Papabear to respond, so no worries there. 

It’s rough being your age in this world, and even tougher when you realize you are a transsexual person and live with a conservative family. You have my sympathy.

Your parents are wrong on at least two counts: that this is just a phase and that you shouldn’t change as you grow. Conservatives, by definition, are afraid of change; they want everything to stay in a nice little world they can easily categorize and understand. But life isn’t that simple, and human beings are definitely not that simple!

At 15, it would be very difficult for you to stand up in front of your parents and explain just who you are and have them accept it; you’re likely still having difficulty fathoming it all yourself! That’s why it would be very helpful for you to find someone who can help.

I see you are in Colorado. There are LGBT community centers in Denver, Boulder, and Colorado Springs. Visit http://www.lgbtcenters.org/ to find out more about the resources available to you online and in brick-and-mortar centers in your area. If you go to the Contacts page at http://www.lgbtcenters.org/contact.aspx you will see some free counseling hotlines and an online form, as well. There is also the GLBT National Help Center http://www.glbtnationalhelpcenter.org/ and some great information at the IMPACT site at http://www.impactprogram.org/lgbtq-youth/coming-out/. You would do well by starting there.

Your best weapon in the upcoming debate with your parents about your being trans is arming yourself with the facts. Read up on the literature. But, again, the problem with your just trying to convince them you are transsexual and that they should let you be you is that you are 15 and they still feel very much like they need to protect and control you. Therefore, it is vital that you back yourself up with some professional assistance.

Call one of the hotlines and ask them what your next steps should be. They will be the most helpful.

Take Care,

Papabear

SO ive been writing this story in my spare time off and on. here is a little tid bit of it. Let me know what you guys think about it, some improvements that could be made, ect.

Story idea: ~~Kumba is a tribal polar bear from deep deep in the ice lands. Yet he is no ordinary member of this tribe. He is of semi-importance but what could you expect given he is the chieftain’s son? Well basically put...in Kumba's story he is not well liked by his father. Not well liked at all. Kumba is a smart, intellectual, thinking, strategic, kind of bear. One that thinks before he acts. Problem here is that Kumba's tribe is based on brutality and strength, not strategy and quick wits. So he is forever the misfit, refusing to give into their ways, the kind of thinking that brutality gets you anything but in his mind he thinks "at what cost though will brutality win? when we have captured their tribe and lost half our people? there has to be a better way.." Well you see the disappointment here right? His father wanted a big beefy brutal son. But he got gentle Kumba instead. A bear who thinks. So on his 10-13th birthday (undecided) Kumba's father sends an assassin to Kumba's room to murder the young polar bear prince in his sleep but earlier that day Kumba had caught wind of his father's plan and hid till the assassin left his room. In an act of sheer craziness and quick thinking Kumba has a lightning fast though and thinks of the legendary staff in his fathers study. A staff said to belong to the very first chieftain who sunk his soul and magic into the staff but ever since has remained dormant, waiting for it's next owner to arrive in time. A gentle soul to put the tribe back on the right path. Well when Kumba does get into the study and grabs the staff...It shines bright and comes to life, a bright blue icy light filling the room then dimming down. Unaware of what happened, Kumba grabs the staff and runs off into the wilderness never to return again. That is till he reaches the age of 25 where he can take his rightful place on the throne as chieftain of his tribe. Until then he has the staff with him training in the wilderness, growing stronger by the day till he can finally face and over throw his father. ~~

Lets begin: A soft, shallow, chilling wind blows, A twinkle in the night to which owns the clearest of night skies with the stars twinkling on high as they reflect against the cold snow fallen to the ground. In the distance, a castle that just radiates the beauty of ice and snow with a subtle divine grace. Yet in its beauty you find an equality ferocity. Like a wild Polar Bear, it is beautiful but yet at the same time a fierce predator. It's a quiet night in the castle, much like any other night. Yet something about this night in particular sets a particular calm, and beautiful, night off. Just a touch, a touch so little that any who did not reside in the castle most likely would not have taken notice to it, yet to those who did it was there for sure whether it be in the rumor fueled whispers between the servants behind the castle walls or the overall feel of the slightly struggling tribe surrounding the palace. Something was happening tonight; something important. Something that would alter history itself, or at the very least something that would set off such an event to take place in the future. Yet the only question that remains is what it was. What is going to happen tonight that will forever alter the face of history as the poor unsuspecting tribes people should know it?

The week started just as any other week does for our little Polar Bear prince, Kumba. He started his morning routine of waking up, bathing, having the servants dress him in that day's attire, and then off he was to have breakfast with his Father, *NAME *, the King of the *TRIBE NAME * 's people. He and his father sat there in silence, as per usual, while they ate. Kumba had grown used to the silence over the years where as it once used to bother him when he was a smaller child. Kumba lifted his head and looked to his father over at the other end of the excessively long table that went the length of the room; whom of which was dressed in his usual morning attire of his icy blue crown, deep royal purple cape with a white trim and his purple loin cloth, all of which popped against the white fur, which was much like his own fur, with the exception that Kumba almost seemed whiter, if that were possible. A True sign of royalty, their clothes were, among the people. Only difference is...only his fathers rules were law and not his own. Then suddenly, in a moment's notice, it dawned on him that he has never felt farther from his father than now. The Scene wasn't any different and was the same as any other day, so why be so prevalent now? Pushing his feelings to the side, dismissing them, Kumba lets out a gentle sigh into his plate. His father, taking notice, lifts his head from his plate and looks at his son in silence for several moments before deciding to, in a deep voice, asks“What's wrong, my son? Is your breakfast not to your liking this morning?” Ears perking Kumba replies “No..it's nothing. It's just...Mother..This is her favorite Breakfast and she would have Loved it..” Not knowing what to say, his father just stares at his son. Kumba has had a really hard all throughout his life in regards to not having a mother. You can give a boy as many jewels, toys, and sweets as his heart desires but not even all of that added up could replace any child's mother. Kumba has been told, as long as he can remember, that moons ago when he was an infant just learning to crawl that his mother was murdered in the middle of the night. Nobody ever knew why, but yet nobody ever questioned it either out of respect for the family. Kumba has tried to get information of his mother out of his father and the servants who served her when she was alive but alas all he has managed to gather was that she was beautiful, loving, caring, and loved to bake. All the while she could still hold her own with a sword, but that would be only fitting of the queen. It was rather the way she did it though, with such beauty and grace that it was as if the sword was apart of he down to his very core. Down to hisvery soul.

(this is only the whole story so far and also this is a rough cut. not edited or anything. just going with a flow before adding and deleting bits)

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So my friend is a furry and she finally convinced me to join the fandom. I am in need of some guidance, and I made a fur affinity account several months ago but never truly got into it. Is there anything I should know or look up so I'm caught up and settled? Hopefully you guys will accept me into your culture.

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The Raccoon's Den (Opening Theme)
The full version of our opening theme, made by Bandit. Download on iTunes: http://hyperurl.co/0bj28x (C) 2014 The Raccoon's Den THANKS FOR SUBSCRIBING!!! FACEBOOK: http://www. From: The Raccoon's Den Views: 1062 15 ratings Time: 02:53 More in Entertainment

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What do you have as an opinion on the fandom and furries in general that you think may be unpopular? Honestly, I'm curious!

This is purely for discussion purposes. Don't downvote things simply because you disagree with them; downvote if they are do not contribute to the conversation or completely distastefully offensive.

These are just opinions.. they are not facts and only reflect people's personal thoughts on certain things!

My opinions:

• Angel-Dragons are not at all cute. Though I do believe that Telephone is very charming as a performer, but that's it.
• The fandom seems to be completely obsessed with sexuality.
• I wish there was a clean-art only furry site so I didn't have to deal with porn.
• I will not watch or commission artists who post things on their page or submissions like "stupid gay dog" or define their sexuality or themselves or art as "faggot". It's just distasteful to me, regardless of if it's a joke or not.

How about you?

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