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The Cats of Ostia Antica sounds like quite an ordinary title perhaps, but this new full-color dialogue-free graphic novel is anything but ordinary. Scripted and illustrated by Julian Brier, this hardcover book is available now from Tinto Press. “The sun sets on a seemingly normal day over the ruins of the ancient roman city of Ostia Antica. The groundskeeper tends to his duties and is kept company by the cats that inhabit the nooks and shadows of the historical site. What was once a seemingly normal dinner after work for the groundskeeper takes a turn when he loses consciousness and finds himself in a slightly skewed reality. Led by one of his feline friends, he finds himself back at the gates of Ostia Antica and what lies beyond is a resurrected city full of ghosts and ghouls of every kind, beckoning for him to join the party.” Solrad.co has a preview of several pages, which should give you a better idea what you’re in for.

image c. 2020 Tinto Press

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Fluke the Husky joins us today talking about his dancing, his service in the USAF, and the pesky crown.  Can a census taker figure out ages? Is Taebyn an apologist? Are stories better than Math?  Tune in and spend some time with Bearly and Taebyn.  It is a calming respite from a crazy week!

Support the show

Thanks to all our listeners and to our staff: Bearly Normal, Rayne Raccoon, Taebyn, Cheetaro, TickTock, and Ziggy the Meme Weasel.

You can send us a message on Telegram at BFFT Chat, or via email at: bearlyfurcasting@gmail.com

Bearly Furcasting #31 - Fluke the Husky, Black Friday, Qdoba v Chipotle

I have no idea what they’re saying but I like how they say it.

International Furry Commercials

Papabear,

I have been having on-again-off-again thoughts on completely leaving the furry fandom for a couple of weeks recently.

I’ve been part of the furry community for about six years and got to know a couple good friends. I appreciated all of the good aspects the fandom has to offer during this time. However, I feel like my interests are changing as I get older, and I find myself enjoying it less and less. My trust issues started deteriorating even more because of these thoughts. I don’t want to cause any hard feelings with those friends in this fandom if I do decide to leave.

When we’re young, we think that things can last forever ... but they don’t. I know that life changes, people change, and everything changes overtime. It can be hard to accept at times, but moving on from something you no longer enjoy can be for the better.

I also am aware of the negative stigma around furries, and I stay away from all of the toxic parts of the community as much as possible. I haven’t really told people in real life about my furry-ism out of extreme fear that I might lose friends. It leads me to have serious social anxiety and me always feeling very reserved around others.

Nowadays, I honestly don’t know if I should stay in a fandom like this for the rest of my life. I’ve been part of it for so long that I don’t know how to quit. Sometimes I keep asking myself: “Do I really want to dedicate my time and energy into this any longer? Is it time to move on?”

So I ask you, Papabear: If I ever want to leave the furry community and move on with my life, how should I properly do so?

Anonymous (age 21)

* * *

Dear Reader,

There are a few ways in which the furry fandom is unique from other fandoms, and the whole "I'm leaving the fandom" thing is one of them. You never hear someone say, "I'm leaving the Whovians" or "I'm formally announcing I'm no longer a Trekker," but when it comes to furries somehow it's a big, drama-inducing deal.

So let me set your mind at ease. If you don't want to do furry stuff anymore, just stop doing it. It's only a big deal if you make it a big deal. It's not like you're leaving the mob and we're going to track you down and make you sleep with the fishes. It's just a fandom, okay?

Look, in my opinion, there are two types of people in the fandom: 1) people who call themselves furry because being furry is a part of them; it's who they are, and they can't "stop" being furry any more than you can "stop" being a Homo sapiens. It's in your genes. 2) people who got into the fandom kind of as a hobby and because it was a way to socialize with fun and crazy people, but they don't have truly fuzzy hearts. Some of them, frankly, just got into it for the porn; some got into it for the gaming; some liked the fursuits. But then they "grow up" and decide that the fandom is just childish and they have lost interest. This typically happens to hobbyists when they reach their twenties, or finish college, get a job etc. Sounds to me like you are in this second type.

I'm not trying to shame you, not at all. You're just not a dyed-in-the-wool furry. You had some fun with it, made some friends, all good. Now you're done with it (or soon will be) and ready to be an "adult" (whatever the heck that means). So, as to your question on how one gracefully bows out, well, first of all, don't make a scene. Don't make a huge dramatic announcement on the social sites that "I'm leaving the fandom." That just comes off as vain and needy. Secondly, this doesn't mean you have to lose your furry friends. I would contact all the friends with whom you have close ties and say, "Hey, I've kind of lost interest in doing furry stuff and won't be active in the fandom anymore, but I'm grateful to have you as a friend and I hope we can continue to be friends...." Make sure they have your contact information and you can talk to them on Messenger or the phone or whatever. You can then be a "furry friend" who hangs with furries but really is not one himself. This is totally doable and can be rewarding. My late husband fell into this category. My fursuit maker, Beastcub, is not a furry but simply a person who enjoys making fursuits.

So, that's how you do it. Don't be dramatic. Keep the friends you want to keep. Move on with your life, and may it be a happy one.

Hugs,
Papabear

More news from Animation World Network, this time featuring a well-known celebrity. “Iervolino Entertainment has debuted the first images from its new animated series Puffins, revealing the character ‘Johnny Puff,’ who is being voiced by star Johnny Depp. The mobile-first, short-form project was announced in June and is now in production… Puffins follows the adventures of a group of cute little birds, who work for the wily walrus Otto. The main characters of the series are five puffins: Johnny Puff, Tic and Tac, Didi and Pie. They live with a tribe of puffins in the vast and technological realm of Tana. The stories in the series will range from the bold missions of Otto, to multiple situations related to the small, fun problems of everyday life, addressing the issues of social impact in a childish way.” Now let’s see if this one winds up available in North America. [Thanks for reading — and a Happy Thanksgiving to you and your family, from ye humble ed-otter.]

image c. 2020 Iervolino Entertainment

They’re here….  Well done!

If you have never seen the original it is this scene from Poltergeist:

PokéShots: Poltergeist move

News from Animation World Network that Zodiac Kids (part of Banijay Studios in California) will be producing a new Mumfie animated series for markets in Europe. “Mumfie is a preschool comedy series based on Magic Adventures of Mumfie by Britt Allcroft (creator of Thomas & Friends and the film Thomas & The Magic Railroad). Told with heart and humor, the brand-new series features the optimistic young elephant Mumfie, who along with his best friends, Pinky the flying pig and Jelly Bean the color-changing jellyfish, are the helpful heroes of this whimsical series. As our trio embark on their daily adventures you’ll get to meet their eclectic bunch of animal friends: A cheeky crocodile who thinks he’s a king and his mischievous cat confidant; there’s a hermit crab mayor and a giraffe who runs a hotel on an iceberg; you’ll see a jolly yellow whale and a skateboarding zebra, as well as some pirate wolves and a Greek chorus of funny frogs. In this world, nothing is quite what it seems and no matter what challenges arise, no flop, failure or fiasco is unfixable for Mumfie and his friends.” As is typical for such properties, there’s no word on if this new series will be distributed in North America, but with the Internet anything is possible.

image c. 2020 Zodiac Kids

My god! It’s full of fur!

(Does fender end up as a starfox cub at some point after this?)

For reference this was found in Utah: https://bgr.com/2020/11/25/utah-monolith-tv-movie-prop/

This world is absolutely incredible and it is astonishing that it was made so quickly since the recent discovery of this object in real life. Truly amazing work.

Utah Monolith

Tugs and Nuka interview a returning guest, Charm, to discuss their non-binary gender journey. It's a fascinating and deep story that has a few unexpected twists and turns!





NOW LISTEN!
SHOW NOTES
SPECIAL THANKS

Charm! (Our guest)

PATREON LOVE
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Plus Tier Supporters

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MUSIC

Opening Theme: RetroSpecter – Cloud Fields (RetroSpecter Mix). USA: Unpublished, 2018. ©2011-2018 Fur What It’s Worth. Based on Fredrik Miller – Cloud Fields (Century Mix). USA: Bandcamp, 2011. ©2011 Fur What It’s Worth. (Buy a copy here – support your fellow furs!)
Space News Music: Fredrik Miller – Orbit. USA: Bandcamp, 2013. Used with permission. (Buy a copy here – support your fellow furs!)
Patreon - The Tudor Consort, Inflammatus, Creative Commons, 2010
Closing Theme: RetroSpecter – Cloud Fields (RetroSpecter Chill Mix). USA: Unpublished, 2018. ©2011-2018 Fur What It’s Worth. Based on Fredrik Miller – Cloud Fields (Chill Out Mix). USA: Bandcamp, 2011. ©2011 Fur What It’s Worth. (Buy a copy here – support your fellow furs!) S9 Episode 3 – NB NB NB - Tugs and Nuka interview a returning guest, Charm, to discuss their non-binary gender journey. It's a fascinating and deep story that has a few unexpected twists and turns! - NOW LISTEN! SHOW NOTES SPECIAL THANKS Charm! (Our gues

As a comics fan I’ve managed to grow a much thicker skin when it comes to the regularly occurring discussion of “are comics art” or the dis”it’s kids stuff. When Allan Moore accuses comics of causing a “deliberate, self-imposed state of emotional arrest” it makes my appreciation of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic a really difficult stance to defend. What? It’s a great comic and it succeeds for exactly the same reason the now ten year old rebooted cartoon did by being bright, colourful,charming and uncomplicated in terms of real life. I know exactly what the appeal is and where it fits into my reading diet. It’s the comics equivalent of a huge,warm comforting blanket and I don’t think that’s a bad thing. It’s the warm and reassuring kind of media we’ve all retreated and relied on even more in 2020. Oh,that’s not to say that the Ponies don’t have huge adventures and even bigger problems,but there cute problems! The “Mane Six” can usually untangle any complication within an issue or two without too much bother. Although the series ended last year, the comic gallops on into season 10 straddling the line perfectly with being a great all ages read whist still appealing to the older ‘Brony’ side of the fandom without pandering to them.

Such is the creators’ confidence in My Little Pony at this stage,the new ‘season’ begins without the involvement of the regular familiar faces, instead focusing on Apple Jack, the rhyming zebra Zecora and a whole cast of new characters in her old friends. A mixture of Zebra’s, kelpies and other characters keep the comic constantly inventive with a lot more world building than is surely needed for a ‘kids comic’.

There can be no doubt that creative team over at IDW know the show inside and out but are also dyed in the wool geeks themselves as this issue begins with Zecora recalling in true D&D style an imaginary adventure she played with her old friends journeying across “The Desert of Infinity” as they cross a far more real and perilous desert. The recollection ends with the revelation she is a true DM and ended it when she “got fed up and told us we all died of heatstroke!”

Longtime FiM artist Andy Price takes up art duties on season 10 and while he has always taken cues from the show has developed a look that’s in keeping with the animation whilst being clearly distinct. A little more cartoony, his ponies emote with the best of them and appear expressive and elastic. Clean, cheerful and exuberant art that is filled with adorable background details and outstanding character design for the new additions to the gang.

Did I say it was uncomplicated earlier? Well the thread running throughout the adventure this issue is Zecora reconciling with her friends whilst realising that their will always be different perspectives to events, even if we have thought of them as immutable as she asks her former friends “If I can put our past aside, can you forgive me for my pride?” This is all before the issue delivers on the warning “there is singing in this comic” on its cover and bursts into a fullon musical number that was a Hallmark of the series on screen,translating it onto the page through Prices framing and pop culture nods to show the different styles coming into play. When Zecora appears in a very iconics yellow leather jacket it’s evident that the song has reached it’s epic stadium anthem conclusion.

Man, Animalmics was rather different this year.

ATHLETICUS is an animated TV series created by Nicolas Deveaux, the awarded director of short films “7 tonnes 3”, “5 mètres 80” and “1 mètre/heure”. Wild animals compete in athletic events: from table tennis to fixed bar, bobsleigh and curling, the animals of ATHLETICUS react according to their personality and the peculiarities of their anatomy, creating comical or poetic situations, but always offbeat. After a successful Season 1 about summer games, Season 2 started on ARTE in April 2019 and the animals are now competing in winter games!

Atheticus: The Encounter

Hello Papabear,

I recently made my own fursuit, and hey! It's not too bad! But ... where can I fursuit? I fursuited on Halloween, and it was fun. Everyone liked it! Yay! I had some other ideas. are these good?

1: Wearing it whenever we have a yard sale
2: Bday parties
3: Making funny YouTube videos
4: To friend group's Christmas parties
5: To the city park
6: On a walk.

Those are just my ideas, but I really need your advice!

;w;
Ozzy the Party Parrot (age 13)

* * *

Hi, Ozzy,

Congrats on making your first fursuit! Is it a parrot like your fursona? Neat :-)  Let's start with a look at places NOT to wear a fursuit, first. Because your face and identity are concealed, the first thing to remember is not to go traipsing into a bank or government facility because you'll be tackled by security guards! It is also not advisable to wander into a place of business with your head covered without the business owner's permission for pretty much the same reason (this is why you might see furries wearing ears and tails but not a head at a store). Now, if you inform a business owner ahead of time, and they say okay, that's fine. Public parks can be hit or miss. For example, the San Diego Furries meet and fursuit at places like Balboa Park with no problem, but I have a furiend up in the Bay Area who once got approached by police for suiting in a park there because someone reported a suspicious person. So, when it comes to parks, do a little research up front or go with a group of furries who have organized an event. I would check ahead, too, before suiting at fairs and festivals to make sure the organizers knew I was going to be there (e.g., I've been thinking of fursuiting at the Palm Springs Street Fair, but I would check with them before I did so). Wearing what is essentially a mask in public has a history of issues related to what's going on in our society. For example, the rise of terrorism has made authorities very suspicious of people concealing their faces in public places; on the other hand, with COVID around everyone has to wear a mask. Wutcha gonna do? It's confusing. So, rule of thumb: always plan ahead and make sure it's okay before you fursuit in a public place or business.

Let's move on to ideas for good places to fursuit. Besides furcons and meets, going to related activities is a great alternative. For example, a lot of furries suit at Renaissance Faires. Comic book conventions are also a sweet place, as are related cons like anything related to anime, sci-fi, and fantasy. Wearing your fursuit on Halloween is also perfect (as you found out). Of course, anything to do with fursuiting on your own property or in the homes of friends and family is absolutely fine, so that covers your ideas about yard sales, birthday parties, and Christmas parties, as well as doing anything online like making YouTube videos. Taking a "walk" in fursuit kind of depends, as noted above, as to where you are walking. If you walk around your own neighborhood, that's probably fine, and I have never heard of anyfur getting in trouble for doing that.

Thanks for your question! Happy Fursuiting!

Hugs,
Papabear​

The genesis of a community is today’s furry news. TPH (TinyPrancingHorse) asked if I could cover his humorous science fiction series that features several anthropomorphic species. I sent back an offer: Let’s see your own story that covers — (1) The content that makes the community’s backbone — (2) Proof of how it gets support like money or views —  (3) Nuts and bolts of how it got going — (4) Earned experience from doing it. I hope this inspires YOUR creation. (- Patch)

They are Smol has a main page here, and the first chapter can be found here.

What’s it about?

When people think of their favorite series – be it Star Wars to Tolkien, Discworld to Dune – there’s always a sense of mystery and nobility to how those series began. It starts with Men and Women, taking their life experiences, war stories, deep thoughts and desperate hopes, and pulling from that mysterious aether of the “could be” and bringing it into the real world.

Then there’s my series, Smol.

They are Smol was not created out of the desperation of homelessness, the pain of war, the desire to preserve culture, or any other number of excellent and moving reasons. They are Smol was created during a mental breakdown at work, where the author – on a throwaway reddit account – ended up tapping into something interesting in the human psyche.

All too often, in popular media – games, movies, books – humanity is depicted as this ascendant demigod given form, and they often have a cute sidekick character to play off of and highlight these traits. Think Rocket Raccoon, or if you’re in the Monster Hunter universe, the Palicoes. Something cute to headpat, something small to protect, yet noble in their own right.

Make our species that cute.

They are Smol simply reverses roles to consistently comedic effect, putting the reader in the position of the adorable yet terrifyingly effective sidekick. The story takes place in the near future after a disastrous first contact and the subsequent accidental invasion of Earth. Humanity is on a rapid uplift schedule. Partly because our alien neighbors feel guilty, partly because having another allied species is a boon all around, and partly because it took us something like 150,000 years to learn how to plant grain.

…look, nobody ever said we were clever. Humans, as a whole, oscillate between abject fear at the otherness of our friendly (if confusing at times) alien neighbors; and the frustration that they keep putting everything way up high on the top shelf.

Show me some metrics!

• As of writing this article, They are Smol has produced 5 books ranging between 35K – 50K words each, distributed to a 20,000+ strong readership base.
• They are Smol has also expanded, grown into a horrific megacorporation that has ~150 patrons who are generously supporting the project to the tune of $730/mo.
• This has allowed the team behind They are Smol to produce a bi-monthly podcast, a visual novel, plushies (still in the works), meme artwork and many other things.

How did it start?

As a content consumer, I’m the kind of person who binges. I enjoy taking in whole series of things, and then going back and picking them apart and turning it over in my mind – honestly, I don’t know if I was hurt by an abandoned story as a child or what, but it is what it is. I do the same thing no matter the type of content, be it Chernobyl from HBO or the entire Discworld series of books by Pratchett.

So, when I was bored one day at work (in a doomed position, no less) I stumbled back across Reddit, and more specifically their /HFY/ board – shorthand for “Humanity, Fuck Yeah!” With literally nothing else to do but count down the clock, I opened up a couple of stories and began to read.

And just didn’t stop.

We are talking dozens and dozens of individual universes. Stories that – after consuming 200K words over the span of a week or two – ended up following the same tired tropes. Mankind = best. Aliens = worst. All enemies are cardboard cutouts and we can windmill through space doing nothing special or amazing in particular. It was… boring, after a while.

When I had my mental breakdown at work, I sat down at my laptop and wanted to write the anti-story to this entire genre while still staying within the genre. Humanity, people, they’re amazing not because of what they are but because of what they can do and the choices they make. So the first chapter was cranked out in a 100% stream-of-consciousness flow, submitted with absolutely no editing or re-reading, and I went on with my lunch break.

An hour later and 900+ upvotes, it looked like there was some desire for more. Another stream-of-consciousness outpouring, zero formatting, and a fight for your right to party netted roughly 750+ more upvotes. Chapter three – 820+ upvotes.

It seemed the game was afoot.

They are Smol started to get fanart, it started to get some traction on social media, and for giggles I ended up putting together a Discord server so people who liked the story could talk to me directly. At the behest of someone in the comments section, I was told to put up a Patreon – and within it’s first few days, it shot up to $150/month.

“Oh dear.” I thought. “This is now a thing, isn’t it?”

Fan art

How is it managed?

One thing that comes with things being a thing is that you need to keep momentum going; communities will wither and die if there isn’t a steady stream of new coming in – be it new people, new content, or new fan works. As a creator, you have to carefully manage that universe you’re creating, both in your own mind as well as in reality – for your fanbase is the most important thing you have going for you.

Management is key, as you can’t fix what you don’t measure. This means walking down the decision funnel and figuring out what you can handle yourself, what needs to be automated, and what needs to be delegated (if you’re working with a team). The Decision Funnel for those who don’t know is pretty simple:

Take thing that needs to be done -> See if it can be automated. If not -> See if it can be delegated. If not -> do it yourself.

So in my posts, for example, I link to all my media, website and community locations. In all of those places, I try to automate as much content as I physically can. I explicitly tell my fans that they are welcome to make any art, music, writing, etc – any content at all – as long as I can share it with the world at large, and I stuff the meme pipelines full of fan-created works.

They are Smol is a community effort, and cannot sustain itself without the work and love of everyone involved, both officially and unofficially; so remove the friction between your fans and the work itself and everyone profits, everyone participates, and everyone gets to enjoy the thing that is now becoming a thing.

Social media calendar and more fan works.

What keeps members together?

One note on community building – you must be intentional while doing it. You have to have a community charter that your fans can see and abide by, and a second charter of higher standards for those you trust to staff and manage your community in your stead. It is the most important thing when it comes to building a fanbase that you have everyone who wants to participate acknowledge and agree to that charter, as it puts everyone on a level playing field, explains what behavior is acceptable, and sets the tone for the community at large. (See Culture Code Notes below.)

Even if you have a fanbase of a couple dozen people it’s important to create that living culture document. They are Smol has it as a prerequisite to join the community server, and in doing so it automatically vets out the people who are not interested in being good members of the community.

I can point to this community statement – both the actual laws and the cultural guidelines – as the sole reason why we are able to build a non-political community that (to my knowledge) has members of every single political party, both radical and centrist, without it devolving into a gigantic dumpster fire. The cultural guidelines are why we have a self-help/ask-for-help channel where people can go to work on their own selves, as well as get questions answered on anything from finances to art, writing to cooking. They are Smol’s community builds each other up and recognizes the inherent humanness of everyone, and because it’s baked into the charter of the community from the ground up it only magnifies and amplifies itself in a virtuous cycle.

We are smol, but getting bigger.

All these things build on each other and allow me – and my team – to focus on multiple projects at once.

I’ve been able to host multiple panels at various conventions (talking about storytelling and business practices) because I’ve been given the bandwidth to learn and grow and not deal with infighting or drama.

We have multiple writers working on side stories and new IP, partner-artists building a visual novel as well as various other goodies (such as finger puppets! What other series has official finger puppets, huh?!), and the community is encouraged to interact with us as they desire.

We would love to have you as well.

They are Smol has a main page here, and the first chapter is here. Get exclusive content on Patreon, interact on Discord, follow the newsletter or on Twitter.

Like the article? These take hard work. For more free furry news, follow on Twitter or support not-for-profit Dogpatch Press on Patreon. Want to get involved? Try these subreddits: r/furrydiscuss for news, r/furrywriters, or r/waginheaven for the best of the community. Or send guest writing here. (Content Policy.)

TigerTails Radio Season 12 Episode 49 Join the Discord Chat: https://discord.gg/SQ5QuRf For a full preview of events and for previous episodes, please visit http://www.tigertailsradio.co.uk. See website for full breakdown of song credits, which is usually updated shortly after the show. Some music provided by https://audiograb.com/u/XimerTracks Some music provided by http://spoti.fi/NCS Backing music by Sanxion7.

Whoops! With everything else going on, we kinda missed this recent Halloween offering. It’s still available though, and worth a look. Storm Kids: Stanley’s Ghost is the latest comic series from filmmaker John Carpenter’s Storm King Productions. “Oh no! Who’s been stealing fruit from all the gardens in Arbordale? Was it the prankster Chester Chipmunk? Or maybe Baby Fang? Accusations fly until someone suggests that maybe it was the Ghost of Bunnyburrow Manor! Neighbors have claimed to have seen it flying around, but are ghosts even real? And if they are, why would they be stealing fruit? Stanley Squirrel offers to lead an expedition into the house to see if it really is haunted and find out just what’s been going on. But as the gang creeps around the house looking for answers, what they find isn’t what any of them were expecting!” It’s written by Paul D. Storrie, with art by David Alvarez and a cover by Jeffe Balke.

image c. 2020 Storm King Productions

Animated series from Apple TV+ with 3 children and their Panda friend based on based on the Scholastic book series “Zen Shorts” by Jon J. Muth.  Very cute.

Karl’s imagination has no limits. Meet Karl and his siblings when Stillwater arrives to Apple TV+

Stillwater

Recently, furry enamel pin maker Fursona Pins announced in a tweet warning of counterfeit Dogbomb pins in circulation, which according to them, was made by an ex-staff who was removed in violation of their policies before. Genuine Counterfeit Thick outlines (front) Thin outlines (front) Dark brown sunflower (front) Light brown sunflower (front) Smooth back Rough […]

Though big progress on the COVID-19 vaccine has been made, at the current stage, the pandemic still leaves many in uncertainty, which led to 13 furcons holding next year moving further into 2022. Mexican furcon Confurtiva announced Saturday the cancellation of their 2020 edition slated for last weekend. They say hybrid physical-virtual events will be […]

Hey, Papa, 

It’s me again; hope you’re doing well. As of now I am a senior in high school, and after I graduate I’m moving from New Jersey to North Carolina for college. Now I do love NC. In fact I’m here right now as school is remote and I can still attend online. My parents are retiring in a beautiful home at St. James Plantation and have made many friends there which I get on with. I love the little town of Southport that’s nearby, and the cute little beaches and local restaurants and stores all about. I’m also quite looking forward to college, as I’ve visited several campuses already, and though I know I may still be virtual, I’m excited for the opportunity to grow and learn more about myself. My boyfriend is even going to be moving down here from Illinois too, and although we’ll still be a few hours away, it’s better than being states apart. All things considered, things are going good for the most part.

However, I can’t shake that feeling of sadness when I think of living here. I’ve lived in New Jersey all my life. It’s where I spent my childhood years and has shaped me so far as the person I am now. I love the pretty forests and rolling hills, I love the winding roads through the countryside, I love how the towns have such a rustic, nostalgic feel, and the comfort I experience from knowing them so well. I love the friends and memories I’ve made there, and I’m glad I had the childhood I did. I know I’m going to have to leave a lot of that and more behind, and I’m not sure how to cope with it. I’m not deeply depressed mind you, but the last time I moved was when I was 9, and it was only 45 minutes away. With how long you’ve been around, I think it’s safe to assumed you’ve moved at least a few times, as I know it’s a common experience. What should I do to help accept and (try to) heal these emotions?

Galaxy (age 17)

* * *

Dear Galaxy,

Nice to hear from you again and thanks for the update. To answer your question, what you are experiencing is simply nostalgia for the past. Yes, I have moved a LOT. I was born in Boston and have moved nine times, living in Illinois, Ohio, Michigan, and California. So, I know something about moving.

The bad thing about moving a lot is that you never have a town or city you really feel is your home town. If someone asks me my home town, I say where I am now, and if they say, "No, where did you grow up?" I say "all over" because no place feels like home to me. 

My first word of advice: Count yourself lucky that you grew up in a very stable environment, and the result is you will always feel like New Jersey is your true home. That's nice. That's really really nice. As you get a bit older, you will appreciate that more. And that treasure trove of memories of the two homes you lived in, your family, friends, schools, that is always a part of you, and that is beautiful because it sounds like you had a very good childhood (message to Galaxy's parents: Good job, you two!). 

Now you are in North Carolina, and it appears you like that, which is super duper! You have a whole world to explore, new friends to meet, new experiences to take in, new things to learn. The thing about growing older is you have two choices in this regard: you can stay in your little home town all your life, grow old and die there; or you can go out into the world and have new experiences and meet new people, which will open your eyes a lot to different points of view and make you smarter, to boot. There is nothing wrong about being a homey all your life, but it has the very real danger of making one too colloquial and too set in their ways. My mother used to tell a story about her first time in Abilene, Texas, to meet my father's family. Now, my mom had already traveled quite a bit at this point, including Europe. She asked a few of the Abilene residents if they had traveled, too, and they replied invariably, "Why travel when we have everything we need here?" Well, sure, you have food and home and church and friends all there, but you don't know anything about people who are different from you, and that can make you very narrow-minded and inflexible to change, and this is not healthy. (And no, watching TV is not just as good as traveling). Do you know what stays in one place all its life? A vegetable. Animals move. Be an animal.

Cherish your past memories; stay in touch with the friends you can (most people lose touch, but that is up to you and them; you still have the memories); remember the lessons learned and use them as information that can help you with the new challenges you face today. Someday, you will leave North Carolina (but probably come back to see your parents) to get a job or marry or just explore, and then you can look back at North Carolina and your college days and appreciate and learn from them as well.

The solution to your problem is attitude. Do not look at your yearning for Jersey as something that has to be healed or accept. No. The fact you feel that way indicates you had a great past and you should always love it. You don't have to fix that because there is nothing wrong with it. There is nothing to "heal" from. You're not wounded. You're fine.

Go out and explore life! Yay for you! Time to get excited about the future and all it holds!

Hugs,
Papabear

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Haven T. Fusky joins us this week to chat about his life in the Fandom and how he founded a con.  Lemnius Gryphs hangs out with us for the episode too.  Taebyn brings up a couple of huge words.  Is it CompliCOW or CompliPUP.  Come join us for a great time and maybe learn where coffee comes from!  One thing is certain, after this episode, you will have listened to an episode!

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Bearly Furcasting #30 - Haven T. Fusky, Furry Speak, Big Words