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Rainfurrest - A Letter to our Attendees
She Wants to Help Her Friend Who Had a Miscarriage
So I have this non-furry friend that's quite young (under 20, honestly) and she just had a miscarriage. This person is one of my closest buds and I wish to help them, but there's a few things:
1. I have no idea how to, since I’m clueless on this subject.
2. I’m honestly not sure of how to scold them (as she looks up to me as an older sis of sorts), or even if I should! because not only is she quite young but also has no idea of who the father is...
3. I have a weird fear of babies and pregnancies and the such. I'm afraid of sounding insensitive because of this fact, y'know? ... not to mention her family is STRICTLY against abortions and we're afraid of them knowing...
What should I do? What should she do? Are we doomed?
Please help.
~Tune
* * *
Hi, Tune,
Just to be clear: this is about an abortion, not a miscarriage, correct? Because at first you said miscarriage. Also, the abortion has already been done? Or is she thinking of having one? Or is this about miscarriages? Please clarify.
Thank you,
Papabear
* * *
It's about a miscarriage.
* * *
Thanks for the reply, Tune.
Okay (deep breath), it is not your place to “scold” your friend for getting pregnant. Having a miscarriage is a traumatic event in any woman’s life (whether or not the baby was wanted), and so scolding her after she has gone through so much pain will only make matters worse. You say she is one of your “closest buds,” so be there for her in her time of need.
What does this mean? It means you give her a shoulder to cry on and a sympathetic ear. You really don’t have to say much; just be there to listen and to give her a hug.
It sounds a bit like your girlfriend has been a bit free and loose, shall we say, with the guys. A bit promiscuouus and not careful about birth control and safe sex? These are things you can definitely talk to her about. Don’t be judgmental, but be informative and supportive. If (and only if) the topic comes up about sex, advise her to be more careful about birth control and insisting the guy wear a condom (and she should also take birth control pills or other precautions such as IUDs, diaphragms, hormone treatments, etc. that are available to her). The other issue, of course, is STDs, so she really needs to be more cautious.
If your friends is sleeping around a lot, there might be reasons for this about which you have no clue. Sometimes people are promiscuous because they crave affection they didn’t receive in childhood, for example. Sometimes it happens because—again, as a child—they were victims of incest and have malformed concepts of what love is about. You see, it’s not so simple just to judge someone for their behavior, is it? Tread carefully.
Another issue: was she raped? I can’t tell that from your letter, but hope and pray that is not the case. This is an entirely different subject and would, of course, mean that you would definitely be in the wrong if you scolded her for that! So, I am going to assume it wasn’t rape.
Back to her family. I’m not really sure what is going on here. You say they are against abortions. Okay, but she didn’t have an abortion; she miscarried. Is the problem that she didn’t tell her parents she got pregnant and she didn’t know who the father was? I could see why that could upset her parents. I’m sensing that there is quite a communication chasm between her and her parents. That is something that is going to take a long, long time to repair, and the first step should not be suddenly announcing, “Mom, Dad, I got pregnant from a guy I don’t even recall and then lost the baby.” Not a good way to start the dialog.
What you need to do is first make sure your friend has time to recover from this very emotional experience. Don’t preach to her or judge her, like I said, and just be there to listen when she gives you a phone call or even texts you a message. As she talks to her, be a sounding board. Let her express her thoughts and feelings to her and then offer suggestions (not judgments, not rules, but suggestions) on what she might do.
You say she’s under 20, but is she 18 or 19? If so, she is of the age of consent, and the thing to do here is to try and find out why she is behaving the way she is and to try and nudge her into a better direction for her life. This miscarriage might be a wake-up call for her to change her ways.
Although you say her family is against abortion, are they otherwise loving and supportive? If so, then when she is ready to, perhaps she can lean on them, too. If not, she needs to get her life in order and learn to stand on her own two feet before discussing this with her parents. There is, remember, no law saying she has to even tell them, but most people would rather let their parents know, I’m sure, rather than hiding such a secret for the rest of their lives.
Timing is everything, but healing must come first.
Hope that helps.
Hugs,
Papabear
[Software] Program to upload multiple Images to FurAffinity / So Furry / Weasyl
Hello again!
I rewrote the software I wrote a couple weeks ago and made a GUI version out of it.
Basically the GUI looks like this
About the software:
This software allows artists to upload their pictures to:
- FurAffinity
- So Furry
- Weasyl
- You can add multiple Images and edit those before you upload all of them.
- You can simply click on "upload all" and it'll upload every image to the selected websites (With cooldown timer for FA!)
- The whole project is open source (and undocumented … yay)
- Go ahead and compile your own version if you don't trust me
- Autologin (No need to enter the password ever again!)
- Beta! Please report bugs asap!
- Programmed in Java. Which means it runs on: Windows, Mac, Linux!
- You can choose where you want to upload the images (e.g. image 1 only to FA, image 2 to FA and Weasyl, ...)
Please make sure to read the README.md file before using the software since it contains a tutorial on how you use it (and general information's about the software)
Download Links
Credits:
- Thanks /u/freethinkercomic for making such an awesome icon :3
[link] [6 comments]
TIL My mom is a furry.
Well, not a furry exactly, but she loves the idea of humanized animals. I'm thinking of showing her some stuff. Introducing it to her.
submitted by Longhorns2020[link] [48 comments]
Patreon hack blamed on furries, news from Culturally F’ed – NEWSDUMP (10/8/15)
What sparked your love for the furry fandom?
Mine would have to be watching shows like sonic and playing games like spyro and starfox
submitted by Furryfoxman[link] [6 comments]
autumn is coming [commission princessrei]
![autumn is coming [commission princessrei]](http://b.thumbs.redditmedia.com/lmqfgUCEdkDsBdr1hJphikAVl6ikG3ZyTuQmNjD3o4w.jpg "autumn is coming [commission princessrei]")
![[link]](http://i.imgur.com/WR1HnEl.jpg){kind=link}
![[link]](https://i.imgur.com/VnH0BgV.png){kind=link}
![[link]](http://i.imgur.com/CkBkfJk.png){kind=link}
A Furry Short Story
I have been in a bit of a poor state as of late, trouble at home as it were. So, when I am feeling down, I refer to my oldest and reliable set of treatment; writing. If you guys like it I can continue posting the chapters. Please, I always welcome constructive criticism on my writing. I hope you like it!
Part I
The snow blew in drifts across the forest floor as the wind howled across the tall silvery pines. He pulled his fur cloak closer around his body, desperate to keep the wind from seeping between his clothes. It was bitter cold, nothing like he had ever felt, and it bit at his skin even through his thick black winter fur. He wasn’t even wearing much; just his old ridding pants, some leather fastened around his feet as makeshift boots, and of course the fur cloak that he had “acquired” days past from the hunter who was fast asleep. He stopped for a moment, standing in the cold blizzard and snow and thought to himself how much he really hated the fact he had stolen this cloak. That hunter may have needed it, but with that, he reminded himself, he surely needed it more. He shook the conflicting thoughts from his head, pulled the cloak tighter and trudged further through the snow.
The snow was getting high now, it was almost at his waste and the blizzard showed no signs of letting up. He needed to find shelter, and he needed to find it now, lest he freeze to death in this gods forsaken forest. The thought spurred the wolf on a little bit more, yes, shelter is what he needed and a nice fire! It seemed as though there was nothing but snow and pines, pines and snow out here though. He snapped his head to the right, his instincts taking hold, as he heard a crack over his shoulder. The ice and snow was starting to build up on the branches and the tree limbs were starting to break. With his attention towards the snapping branch, he forgot to check his footing and he slipped on an icy rock and tumbled down a bank till he heard a crack and a splash! His whole body, paw to ears was soaking wet. He had fallen in an ice covered creek. Quickly he pulled himself from the frozen waters and drug himself ashore.
His clothes were soaked, his fur was soaked and he was starting to shiver. He wanted to just lay there, he wanted this nightmare to just end. He wanted to just let the winter steal his soul and be done with it, but he was not so easily broken. His iron will had survived much worse, and he would be dammed if he was going to let a little snow and ice break it now. With all his might, he pushed his paws out in front of him, pushing the snow aside and as he began to push himself up, his water logged clothes began to crack as they had already started to freeze. He groaned and growled as the frozen cloak and pants cracked away from his body, snapping off bits of his thick black fur. It was if he was wearing garments made of ice at this point and he knew if he didn’t find shelter in the next few minutes, he would be dead. Even slower than before he pushed himself forwards. One foot forwards into the snow, dragging the other behind him, planting that foot in the icy snow, and dragging the other up behind. Then, just then, he thought he had heard the howl of a bull. He quickly looked around, turning his head from side to side frantically for the sign of life, but he didn’t see anything. He thought to himself that it must be his mind, slowly losing its grip on reality, slipping into the endless madness. He pushed forward again, more carefully this time planting one foot in front of the other, but there it was again, the distinct loud call of a bull. He looked, turning his had side to side and again saw nothing, but then the call came again. His heart burned with the fires of hope and that added hope cracked a cocky grin on his muzzle as he said to himself, “Not today.”
He followed the cries of the bull closer and closer till at last, just outside of the forest he spotted the silhouette of a building. As he got closer he realized that the building was indeed a barn. A fairly decent sized barn he had thought to himself, one probably with cozy warm hay for drying his frozen and soaked clothes and fur. He dragged his frozen body closer and closer till finally he could reach and touch the side of the wooden barn with and outstretched paw. He felt his way to a metal handle and recoiled as the frozen metal felt as if it had burned his paw. He drew both of his paws then in front of his muzzle and blew some warm air from his lungs into his paws, hoping to stay the icy metal for just a moment so he could pull the door open. He grabbed the handle firmly with his icy paws, wincing at the pain of the cold metal and pulled at the barn door, it only groaned under his efforts. This couldn’t be it, he was here, and shelter was inside! He needed to get inside! He cupped his paws in front of his muzzle again and gently blew what felt was the last of his warm breath into them, trying to regain some feeling in the tips of his paw’s digits. Again he winced as he gripped the handle of the door and then, he pulled, and he pulled, and his mustered all of his rage and all of his anger into that door. He remembered being chased from his homeland, his kingdom, by the traitors he had called friends. He remembered his family being sacked and gagged, drug away in the night with nothing he could do. Most of all though, he howled at the thought of the betrayal that had cursed him out into this damned frozen wasteland! With that last thought the door creaked and cracked and groaned as the ice that had frozen it shut had broken away and the barn door slide open. The wolf gave a short sigh of relief before steeping inside and found a nice tall pile of hay to pull himself into.
submitted by KriegVonBeck[link] [comment]