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On this week's episode Metriko is alone as Viro was stuck on an airplane that wouldn't leave thanks to a few tornadoes. Viro made it to Furry Weekend Atlanta and will be back for next week's episode. With that in mind, this episode is slightly more personal and an intimate discussion with Metriko, so please enjoy!

We open this week with a discussion on sex in America. Studies are showing that we are having less sex now than we were in 1989: could this be due to stress and working more in this shitty economy? Is Netflix and chill a lie and used solely for marketing (seriously though it's only $9.99). We look at why social media might be impacting your sex life.

Our main topic is on shame. Last week we discussed what happens when you grow up with shame and choose to keep that subject secret and hidden from others. This week we discuss what happens when you reveal that shame and live life "openly". Metriko talks about his life when he was outed and how that was not the end of his quest for validation, and what it took for him to realize that he was living a lie. We go on a journey together to discover what it's really for.

We close out the show with some feedback from Snares (one of our friends and Patrons)! He wants to know how our response from the Playboy article was, and if it contrasts at all with the feedback he got when he was interviewed for an article himself! Check out the show notes for a link to his interview. Metriko speaks for the show and reminds everyone that if you would like to have us appear in your publication to get into contact with us.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

FA 065 Shame 2: Electric Boogaloo - Why is Metriko alone (in life and on this week's podcast)? Is Netflix and Chill a lie? Can you hide from shame if you wear a mask? Can we get any more flippant in our media responses? All this, and more, on this week's Feral Attraction!

Dear Papabear,

I have a transformation fetish. You see, I loved transformations long before they started being a turn-on for me, but now I feel like I should stop looking at transformations online, even if I'm not looking just to turn my self on, because I feel like its a bad thing to indulge my fetish. What do I do?

Deathcat Gottlieb (age 12)
​
* * *

Hi, Deathcat,

My goodness, 12 is awfully young to be having sex issues. What happened to just being a kid? My advice: stay away from online porn (even G-rated transformation, if that is your trigger) and try to find something to do that is fun, creative, imaginative, and, even better, involves physical activity and social interaction. You're too darn young to be having sex fetish issues. Get your paws away from your groin and go live a more productive life.

Hugs,
Papabear

Submitted by Fred Patten, Furry’s favorite historian and reviewer.

Swift the Cat-Human, by Angelo Bowles. Illustrated by Charlene Bowles.
Donna, TX, VAO Publishing, April 2013, trade paperback $13.99 (206 [+ 26] pages)

VAO Publishing, “A Small Press for the Río Grande Valley” in Donna, Texas, near the mouth of the Rio Grande, specializes in books for and about the Tex/Mex border region; from poetry by South Texans to ¡Arriba Baseball! A Collection of Latino/a Baseball Fiction. Swift the Cat-Human, an omnibus collection of the three books in this series, seems like an unusual juvenile volume for them, but Angelo Bowles lives in Donna. It’s still unusual: he was a 10-year-old 5th-grader in 2011 when he wrote Book 1.

If Swift the Cat-Human hasn’t been “tidied up” by some adult, then I’m jealous. I couldn’t write nearly this well when I was 10 years old. This is an excellent children’s novel in three parts for young furry fans or to introduce pre-teens to anthropomorphics.

Swift is a housecat belonging to Dr. Gonzalo Gonzales. Dr. Gonzales drops a test tube of an experimental virus on the floor, Swift licks it:

“And then the transformation started.

My tail got longer, my back legs got a little skinnier and started stretching, and my front legs seemed to be growing, too. My paws began to lose their pads, and I started to grow opposable thumbs! What good are opposable thumbs, anyway? And five fingers? What’s up with that?” (p. 2)

The transformation is simplistic, but this is a kids’ novel with comic-book science.

“‘Um,’ I said. The vet’s eyes got very big. ‘If you really know Dr. Gonzales, I think you should give him a call so he can get me the heck out of here!’

‘Y-y-you can talk?’

‘Well, I would twitch my ears at you, but I don’t think you’d understand.’” (p. 6)

Dr. Gonzales is afraid the government might take Swift away and keep him secret, so he decides to go public:

“‘I’m going to call all the newspapers and TV stations, Swift. I’m going to tell them about you, and you’re going to talk to them. That way no one can keep you a secret.’” (p. 11)

The government and a big company, ZooTek, argue over whether the cat-human transformation virus should be controlled, and by who. It ends up with Dr. Gonzales working for ZooTek, and ZooTek transforming more cats into cat-humans under close controls such as declawing and microchiping them. Cat-humans are the size of human 10-year-olds, and a lot of people want one. ZooTek wants to be ready to sell them. After two months, there are about fifty cat-humans; all of the “tame” cats held by Animal Control Services. When ZooTek transforms some feral alley cats that Animal Control has just caught, things start to go wrong. Three are transformed but escape before they’re declawed. Swift goes after them, but he’s not a fighter and he has been declawed, so he’s beaten and clawed pretty bloody. A man who just happens to be a former circus performer trains him in martial arts for two months. Swift captures two of the feral cats, but Reaves, the meanest and smartest of the three, has gone after Dr. Gonzales. Swift follows, frees Dr. Gonzales, and meets Kenmei (the black cat on the cover), the new cat-human that Dr. Gonzales has made to replace Swift. But Reaves escapes again, after injecting himself with another virus that will mutate him into something worse.

That’s Book 1, Mix-Up. In Book 2, Shutdown, Swift and Kenmei recruit three more cat-humans to help them catch Reaves; Fluffy, Chrysty (a girl; short for Chrysanthemum), and Mr. Cuddles. In Book 3, Creep-Out, Swift recovers from a six-month coma to find that the situation has deteriorated considerably. Among other problems, there is a giant cat-human monster, Anvill, giving all the cat-humans bad reputations.

Swift the Cat-Human is very much a novel by and for pre-adolescents. Swift has the physique and mentality of a 10- or 11-year schoolboy. His being a cat-boy with a tail and fur gives him, if not exactly super-powers, at least traits that most 10- or 11-year-olds will consider super-cool. There is a lot of schoolboy humor:

“We piled into the back of Enzo’s truck. Mr. Cuddles said, ‘The only time I ever got in a truck was when they took me to get neutered.’

Chrysty looked at him. ‘Thank you for sharing that,’ she said sarcastically.” (p. 60)

“He tried to rush off, and that’s when everyone else joined in. We noticed that we had no armor, so we all got branches, strong ones, and used them like lightsabers (I watched Star Wars with Enzo. It’s old, just like him, but the fights are cool.) (p. 72)

The book ends with several things unresolved. Angelo Bowles says in the unpaged Extras that Books 1 – 3 are just the beginning of a planned ten. There is a Coming in December 2013 announcement for Cat-Human Academy; Book One: Lock-Up; but neither Amazon nor the VAO Publishing catalogue list it. Too bad. Maybe Angelo Bowles decided to wait until he has attended middle and high school before writing those.

As I said, Swift the Cat-Human (cover by Charlene Bowles) is too young for most furry fans, but it is an excellent children’s novel in three parts for young furry fans or to introduce pre-teens to anthropomorphics.

There are other cat-humans, a total of eleven, all profiled in the Extras. Charlene Bowles is identified as the 15-year-older sister of Angelo Bowles. She has also illustrated books by David Bowles (including The Smoking Mirror, a Young Adult novel about shapeshifters), who is apparently their father. It sounds like there is a talented family there.

– Fred Patten

• Buy on Amazon

 

Kanae Fukuda is a crafter from Tacoma, Washington who creates under the name Nyanzilla. Her works include “cute accessories and apparels” like hard enamel pins, plush toys, and even dresses. According to her, “I am an independent Artist branching out into having my own business with the help of people who enjoy my works and with the help of my partner Tibbers, a spoiled German Shepherd!” How does she get anything done? Well, somehow she does. Quite a bit in fact! Check out her Etsy shop to see more.

image c. 2017 by Kanae Fukuda

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Not much details in this teaser but at least this movie season got 20% cooler. What they don't show is the anthros in this film. [1] Yes, the furry invasion of MLP is complete. [1] https://furry.today/wp-content/uploads/2017/04/1359508__safe_capper_mylittlepony-colon-themovie_spoiler-colon-mylittleponymovie_anthro_cat_characterreveal_human_irl_irlhuman_official_photo_.jpeg
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Guest review submitted by Bill Kieffer, AKA Grayflank (author of The Goat: Building a Perfect Victim.)  Guests are invited to submit articles to: patch.ofurr(at)gmail.com.

Fred Patten’s Five Fortunes (FurPlanet, 2014, $19.95) is a collection of five novellas from some of the best writers in the G-rated Furry Fandom.

• Chosen People by Phil Geusz
• Huntress by Renee Carter Hall
• Going Concerns by Watts Martin
• When a Cat Loves a Dog by Mary E. Lowd
• Piece of Mind by Bernard Doove

I am not sure how well the theme of “fortune” applies to the five works, so on that level the collection doesn’t feel all that well tied together, but then with five long works it’s not a heavy criticism. It’s not like there’s a lot of “destiny” fans out there. Each story approaches the nugget of self-determination from a different vector from being mindful of doing the right thing (Geusz) to the finding themselves (Hall) to finding a way to survive the week (Martin) or one’s condition (Doove).

It’s a furry sampler of longer works; perfect for people who don’t always like short stories because the story’s over just as they get to know a character. If, somehow, you don’t know these writers or their universes, then this is a good place to start learning.

CHOSEN PEOPLE by Phil Guesz

The cover story.

I’ve had the advantage of enjoying Geusz’s stories for far longer than most of the Furry Fandom. As part of the TSA-Talk, he was one of the voices that helped shaped my own writing voice through example and conversation. His heroes have an an honesty and vulnerability that I have never been able to match. His worlds reflect the diversity of morality and pragmatism of humanity, and the Lapist story-verse is no exception.

Sheriff Juniper Rabbit is in many ways a typical Geusz hero; Transformed, a minority by choice, and with a specific set of skills, our new sheriff has a unique point of view of both the average Joe and the Privileged classes. Unlike the more moneyed Lapists, Juniper understands that just choosing to become a Rabbit, doesn’t make you a better person. Like most Geusz heroes, Juniper inspires by example and most of his success isn’t just in winning against impossible odds, but in stepping up and being the “better man” time and time again.

Juniper differs from the author’s other TFed heroes in that his transformation is by choice, without coercion or being born into this form. Not that it is without sacrifice, of course, but these changes seem worth it to our hero.

The story’s nice and flies by in Geusz’s light and tight style. The mystery of the arsonist is wrapped up rather too quickly and much of it off camera, but this is less a crime story than a story exploring the Haves’ willingness to dehumanize the Have-Nots. Overlooking the cause of conflicts is much too easy. It’s always been much too easy.

HUNTRESS by Renee Carter Hall

This is a very nice and sweeping tale set in an alternate Africa with anthropomorphic lions villages and somewhat nomadic hunters. This intelligently combines the human and realistic dynamics of human villages with the hunting schemes of lions in the natural world. In Huntress, all the big game hunters are females with their own way of life and traditions. Yet, they are also tied to the villages for trade… and recruiting.

This is a multi-layered coming of age story as Leya goes from child to adult, trying to find her place in the world. Yet, as no time is she an outright outcast. She finds her place several times in the course of the story, and often enjoys the sensation of fitting in.

Over the years, it’s not that she outgrows her place in the world so much as it becomes time to take another place.

Leya’s story was very refreshing in this way. Leya’s not a super-skilled Huntress; Leya is not rejected at every step. Leya grows and does not create a single enemy along the way. Everyone is supportive; but they also have their own emotional needs. In this way, it reminds me of the best chick-lit novels: growing and exploring both your skills and emotional landscape… and yet there’s still action; it’s not all in Leya’s head.

GOING CONCERNS by Watts Martin

If I recall correctly, this is the second story I’ve read set in this universe. The first was Indigo Rain. I quite enjoyed both works even if I think the humans and the furred people get along just a bit to well.

The sparsity of commas was my only complaint I had in Indigo Rain. With Fred running the edits here, I have no complaints with the comma placement and grammar here.

The dialogue might have been way too witty for its own good, but it was played off as a character flaw with the feline detective. To my old eyes, I think the proper placement of “old school” pauses that a comma brings really made the dialogue pop. The plot was a shade tighter and more robust than I recall of Indigo Rain.

I hope I can find more stories with Swift and Scava in them.

WHEN A CAT LOVES A DOG by Mary Lowd

We return to the universe of Otters In Space and join our lead characters, Lashonda (a cat) and Topher (a dog), getting married in a rare mixed species ceremony. It is a nice enough ceremony, marred only by the fact that Topher’s mother believes that this is a publicity stunt. Topher’s a comedian in the early stages of his career and it’s not a wholly unreasonable possibility. The dog is known for his cat jokes; jokes the uplifted felines understand are actually mocking the dogs who are largely in charge of the human free world. But the romance is there…

At first, both claim that they aren’t interested in children — cats and dogs cannot produce offspring in this universe — but when Lashanda sees Topher playing with children in the park, the flood gates open. At first, she wants a litter for Topher and then herself.

How they follow this new dream is an exploration of love and science that made me smile several times and turn green with envy once or twice.

Lowd’s style and execution always fascinate me. She’s a superb craftsman and has a deft hand with a light style. I honestly don’t know how she explores the life changing issues and challenges that she does and keep it honest, yet light. There’s more than a suggestion of depth here, but it never gets too dark or too common. I keep watching her stuff, hoping to learn her tricks, but I oft-times have to just settle with being entertained and inspired.

PIECE OF MIND by Bernard Doove

I know I’ve been aware of Chakats and Doove’s universe for quite some time. I don’t recall the stories readily, but I’m sure that I must have read some of them over the years. I certainly found his pictures on Usenet from my dial-up days. Finding his art on the web today made me feel wonderfully nostalgic.

Reading this story felt like slipping into comfortable old slippers.

In Piece of Mind, I can see that there’s a lot of world building and culture here, but sometimes the struts and framework are a little too exposed. A little too on the money, maybe. The craftsmanship needed to build a cohesive universe are obviously here.

How can I not attach myself to our story lead instantly? I’ve had to deal with anxiety and guilt… not to mention the judgement of others. This should be a cinch, but it’s not that easy. The author’s decision to hide the Caitian’s deep dark secret played well for story needs, but in keeping the reader (ok, this reader) in the dark, it created distance that I had to overcome.

By the time I was invested in Arrak (who went by three or four names in the story — that didn’t help, either), I had very little energy to start getting to know the Chakat Windy as well. Honestly, she became likable quickly enough and was well used to foil Arrak while mentoring him, but given her role in the ending of the story… I didn’t see much of a sniff of the emotions that the conclusion should have been made of.

The end is much too pat, but be that as it may be, the cold cat on the skiing slopes created a few amused and touching moments that let me know that Doove’s capable of selling characters to the reader (or me, in this case).

*spoiler*
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There’s an epilogue on the web version of the story (http://www.furry.org.au/chakat/Stories/PieceOfMind.html). I’m not sure if it fixes my issue of the “patness,” but it does seem a better and more natural display of intimacy than their earlier confession of love.

Buy Five Fortunes on FurPlanet.

Like the article? It takes a lot of effort to share these. Please consider supporting Dogpatch Press on Patreon, where you can access exclusive stuff for just $1. Thank you – Patch

“When I was a kid, I had a pet weasel. I think that’s a rather unusual pet for a kid to have. But I was a rather unusual kid.” That’s the opening of Once Upon A Weasel, a new picture book for young readers. It’s written by Salvo Lavis and James Munn, with full-color illustrations by Dave Leonard. According to the creators it’s “…the story of a misfit boy who, in a spontaneous moment, buys a secret pet that sparks a series of fantasy adventures where the two travel through space and dream of living on the moon. Back on planet Earth, trouble arises when the boy’s pet escapes during a class field trip and turns an entire science museum upside down.” You can find out more (and order the book) at their web site, appropriately enough called World of the Weasel.

image c. 2017 World of the Weasel

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We got a furry music video by Eric Legnini with Yael Naim ... The style is very Osamu Tezuka.
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Submitted by Fred Patten, Furry’s favorite historian and reviewer.

Word of Mouse, by James Patterson and Chris Grabenstein. Illustrated by Joe Sutphin.
NYC, Little, Brown and Co./Jimmy Patterson Books, December 2016, hardcover $13.99 (284 [+ 6] pages), Kindle $9.99.

(See an animated TV ad for the book.)

This children’s fantasy, recommended for 8- to 12-year-old readers (middle grade/grades 3-7), will be too young for most DP readers. But it’s a quick and enjoyable read for those who liked Mrs. Frisby and the Rats of N.I.M.H. – the novel by Robert C. O’Brien, rather than the Don Bluth animated movie that turned it into a fairy tale.

James Patterson is a writing machine. He holds the Guinness World Records for the most #1 New York Times best sellers and the first author to sell over 1,000,000 e-books. He has topped Forbes’ list of the highest-paid authors for the last three years. Wikipedia lists 164 books by him, alone and with a co-author. He has written adult mysteries, thrillers, and romance novels, and young adult and juvenile light school-life novels and science-fiction. His adult thrillers featuring Alex Cross, police psychologist, are by himself alone, and most of his others are in collaboration. Chris Grabenstein is a frequent co-author on his children’s novels. Word of Mouse is their first fantasy featuring talking animals.

The narrator is Isaiah, a mouse:

“My story starts on the day I lost my entire family. I’m running as fast as I can behind my big brothers and sisters. Down the hall. Past the mop bucket. Toward the open door.

We’re escaping from a place that’s foul and creepy and 100 percent HORRIBLE!” (p. 1)

Isaiah is the only mouse who escapes without being recaptured. What makes Word of Mouse of interest to furry fans is that it’s quickly apparent that Isaiah and his siblings are experimental lab mice. Isaiah is bright blue, Abe is crimson, Winnie is chartreuse, and all 97 of them are different colors. But this is just Lamina Research Laboratory’s color-coding. What’s inherent in Isaiah and his siblings are that they’re unusually intelligent, can see in color instead of just black and white, and probably have human life spans instead of a mouse’s usual one to two years.

Isaiah, having been raised around scientists (Lamina is a leader in genetic engineering), knows big words that apply to mice like crepuscular and tenebrous, and can read.

“Did you know that the word mouse supposedly came from the Sanskrit word mus, which means thief? Now, I don’t typically think of myself as a thief. I’ve never taken anything that wasn’t freely given to me. I never had to.

But scurrying through Suburbia, a stranger in a strange land, I realize I might not have much of a choice. No Long Coat is going to come along and toss me my daily scoop of crunchy kibble.” (p. 19)

Isaiah has to learn to avoid suburban predators like cats, dogs, and hawks, and to scrounge like normal mice. His adventures turn from juvenile science-fiction into fantasy as he meets a big family of mice (a mouse family is a mischief) and they can all talk together, although Isaiah knows a lot more than they do. Isaiah develops a romance with a pert girl mouse, Mikayla, and finds that her mischief living in the Brophys’ house is much larger than usual because the Brophys are all slobs who leave half-eaten sandwiches and dropped snacks in all the rooms. He saves them from mousetraps.

“Gwindell twitches her snout. ‘Mmmm. This box smells delicious, too!’

‘No!’ I shout. ‘Don’t go in there!’

‘Why not? It smells so peanut buttery.’ She lunges for the brown box, and I dive to block her.

‘It’s a mousetrap!’ I holler, reading what is written on the side of the cardboard mouse coffin. ‘The floor is covered with glue, and they’ve baited it with peanut butter. If you go in, you’ll never come out!’ Gwindell and her brothers examine the box carefully.” (pgs. 72-73)

He also makes friends with the human girl across the street, twelve-year-old Hailey. She can’t hear him when he talks because his voice is both too soft and in the ultrasonic range, but he jumps around on her computer keyboard like thefictional archy the cockroach did on a typewriter.

But while Isaiah has it made, for a mouse, he wants to rescue his own brothers and sisters who have been locked up back in Lamina Lab’s cages. Which he does, with the help of Mikayla and her mischief, and Hailey.

For those who like Disney-style art, there are attractive full-page or half-page illustrations by Joe Sutphin throughout the book.

My only complaint is with the prejudicial depiction of the lab’s research staff (and by implication, all scientists) as cold and unfeeling at best, and as sadists at worst; constantly sneering, sniggering, and smirking. When Dr. Ledbetter finds out that his lab mice have human-level intelligence, his reaction is to threaten to immediately dissect them instead of studying their intelligence:

“‘It’s good to see you again, B-97. My colleagues tell me that you recently demonstrated some rather unusual talents. Ones I did not know I had given you. I can’t wait to open you up and see what’s going on inside that tiny little blue brain of yours.’” (p. 260)

Word of Mouse (jacket design by Tracy Shaw, featuring one of Joe Sutphin’s illustrations) is good fun for furry fans; and, it goes without saying, as gifts for any young nieces or nephews, and for their own children when they have families. There are paperback, Audible, and audio CD versions, too.

– Fred Patten

• Buy on Amazon

Like the article? It takes a lot of effort to share these. Please consider supporting Dogpatch Press on Patreon, where you can access exclusive stuff for just $1. Thank you – Patch

 

Another one we missed last year, but caught up with this time: Lost Cactus is a full-color on-line comic strip written and illustrated by John Hopkins. Lost Cactus is also, it seems, a top-secret government facility hidden in the desert, where our leaders hide things they don’t want the general public to know about. Things like an irradiated, talking squirrel; a giant anthropomorphic bee; and a small-sized anthropomorphic dinosaur or two. Much silliness ensues when these and other denizens of the Lost Cactus facility interact with the human scientists and military there to run the show — supposedly. Many of the comic strips (and other goodies) have been collected in a new Lost Cactus book, Lost Cactus: The First Treasury. It’s available over at Amazon. You might find out more over at the Lost Cactus web site, but we can neither confirm nor deny that rumor…

image c. 2017 by John Hopkins

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There is a new series on ABC called Downward Dog and it's based off of this short web series. Rather cute. Here is the trailer for the ABC version: https://youtu.be/gE93Fo-xq1A
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Not new so much, but we just came across it: The Moon Minis is a series of full-color books for children written and illustrated by Niall Westerfield. The story is based on the folklore (common to many cultures, especially in Asia) that the dark spots on the moon represent a rabbit making and baking moon cakes for the Moon Princess to allow her to live forever. Well here we find an entire community of little rabbits, The Moon Minis, and they have many comical adventures while they go about their baking duties. All of the books (and a collection of short comic strips) are available at the Moon Minis web site.

image c. 2017 by Niall Westerfield

Savrin and Fuzz return from Furry Fiesta, tired but happy. Shiva has the crud, so she isn't around this week. We talk con, talk shop, talk about dudes who can't control their dicks around women, Fuzz's new phone, deep space trucking, and more. Want to help support the show? We have a Patreon! www.patreon.com/knotcast Want to join the fan Telegram chat? https://t.me/joinchat/AAAAAD9oiYPn1T5Ythpwxg Episode 345 - Squalor

Felix Cosgrove has a new short! "A film about love and regicide."
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New members

We had five new members join the FWG in March—welcome to Ellis Aen, Sisco Polaris, Mark Engels, James Stone, and Halfbloodcheetah! If you’d like more information about joining, read our membership guidelines.

Member news

Frances Pauli published The Earth Tigers, the first book in her Star Spiders series, in early March.

Jako Malan’s novel ReWritten is now available for pre-order from Goal Publications.

Rechan’s short story collection Intimate Little Secrets is now available from FurPlanet.

Mary E. Lowd was interviewed by “dark fiction” blog ShadowSpinners, and wrote a guest post for them: “When Furry Fiction Meets Dark Fiction.”

If you’d like to be listed here, please post your sales/publications to the Member News section of the FWG Forum! It’s the primary source for these news bits.

New markets

We’ve updated the markets on the FWG web site, cleaning out closed/defunct markets and adding a few new ones. Check out the additions and ongoing markets:

• Paying short story markets
• Non-paying short story markets
• Novel/novella markets

Also, Thurston Howl maintains a Google Calendar with submission opening and closings for both furry and “furry-friendly” anthologies.

Remember to keep an eye on the Calls for Submissions thread on the forum, as well as other posts on the Publishing and Marketing forum.

Odds and ends

The Tuesday Coffeehouse Chats continue to take place on the FWG Slack channel, while the Thursday chats continue to take place on the shoutbox.

As usual, we’d like to keep recruiting you to the FWG Goodreads group: add things to our members’ bookshelf (see the instructions here on how to do that), start conversations, draw rabbit ears on other authors’ head shots, and so on.

Have a terrific month! Send news, suggestions, feedback, and coyote treats to furwritersguild@gmail.com, or leave a comment below.

Submitted by Fred Patten, Furry’s favorite historian and reviewer.

The Relics of Thiala, by Beryll & Osiris Brackhaus.
Seattle, WA, CreateSpace, February 2017, trade paperback $15.99 (190 [+ 10] pages), Kindle $4.99.

Beryll & Osiris Brackhaus, two retirees “in the very heart of Germany” according to their website “The Adventure of Romance”, have already written five other books, four in English and one in German. The two Smilodon Pride novels, Softpaw and Sunchaser, feature werecats, werewolves, and vampires, although they all spend most of the time passing as humans.

Now with the Packmasters space opera series, more obvious furries are featured in an unusual premise.

“Twenty years ago, the evil Packmasters used their genetically engineered bestiae in an attempt to seize control of the galaxy. The Core Worlders wiped them out, scorched their planets and kept the few surviving bestiae as trophies.” (blurb)

Really? The protagonists of The Relics of Thiala are Cat, Ferret, Bear, and Wolf, four rare bestiae — anthropomorphic animals — who had been kept as pampered pets or arena gladiators by the human elite. They are “liberated” by a human girl, Ana, to form a new pack. Ana has become aware that the reality she sees does not match “what everyone knows” about the Packmaster-Core Worlds war. The victors write the history books, and from what Ana can see, the Core World masses (not the rulers) might have been better off if the Packmasters had won. Ana – a mysterious adopted orphan who may be a Packlander child – runs away to steal three bestiae pets and one savage arena warrior to form a new pack, and go in search of what really happened to the Packmasters – and what the Packmasters really were (and Ana is).

“Now their misfit pack must face down the darkness at the heart of Packmaster society before it can poison their bond. The truth will either destroy them or grant them the power to shape their own destiny.” (blurb)

The Relics of Thiala is narrated by Cat, who gives it a very furry perspective.

“I had been the pampered pet of of a rich Core senator as long as I could think back. I was a prized possession, cared for in every possible way. There were servants who brushed my fur, servants who fed me and servants who walked me in the gardens so I didn’t turn from chubby to fat. Everything was arranged so I was exactly what my owner expected from a perfectly tame calico tomcat. My markings were rather irregular, large patches of brown and orange stripes on a white coat of fur, the only symmetric part was my tail with its beautiful dark brown and golden rings. But he thought that made me special. He didn’t keep me to display me in competitions, after all. I was his ultimate luxury item – utterly useless and terribly expensive.” (p. 32)

“Ferret stopped in front of one of the heavy steel doors lining the tunnel. Like the rest of us, he was wrapped in a voluminous cloak, concealing that he was a bestia, too. Still he had drawn some puzzled frowns, being mistaken for a human child due to his size. But nobody bothered to intervene – this was Darkside, after all. Nobody bothered, ever. Ferret fiddled with the lock only briefly before he stepped aside and allowed Bear to help him pull the door open.” (p. 11)

“After years of searching, we weren’t much closer to hard facts about the Packmasters, their beastiae and the war than we had been when we had started. Every avenue of research we had tried had turned out to be a dead end.” (p. 39)

“Furred as we were, none of us really needed the robes, but Ana insisted the same way she insisted we had proper clothes. ‘You are not animals. You are just as much entitled to have clothes to protect yourselves and make yourselves pretty as anyone else,’ she had said when she had bought me my first set of clothing. At first, it had felt strange to wear something over my fur, but it did make it much easier to blend in. And I liked being pretty.” (p. 44)

“Since my cooking skills were not suited for anything complicated, I opted for safe and simple. Couldn’t go wrong with grilled steaks when there were four people at the table who had been genetically engineered from carnivorous animal species.” (p. 49)

Cat is the first bestia in Ana’s pack. After years of sneaking about the Core Worlds, living in the shadows while adding Ferret, Bear, and Wolf, the pack is ready to begin its hunt. They steal a crime lord’s gaudy space yacht (whore-house scarlet) – small and automated so the five of them can fly it – and take off for Thiala. “Finally out here on the Fringe, we had uncovered the location of one of the old Packmaster worlds where they had conducted their research and created their bestiae. It’s [sic.] existence had been erased from all official records. There was a good chance we would find nothing but a scorched wasteland, but we hoped that there was a reason, that planet was kept secret. Maybe we would find traces of the Packmasters from before the war, or even records or hints that some had survived somewhere.” (p. 39)

I could pick nits with the story. (1) Walking about in public draped under a voluminous cloak, with a hood completely hiding your face, to go unnoticed may have a respectable ancestry – see the Mafia chieftan Luigi Vampa in The Count of Monte Cristo, by Alexandre Dumas – but just try it in real life and see how “unnoticed” you really are. (And not just one, but a group of cloaked figures.) (2) To quote Wikipedia, “calicoes are nearly always female”.

But this is space opera, not hard science s-f. This review covers the first 50 pages of the 190-page novel (cover by Darbaras, a.k.a. Dávid László Tóth). What will Cat, Ferret, Bear, Wolf, and Ana find on Thiala and the sleazy Vandal space station? Since this is space opera, expect mucho dramatic action and weapons fire.

The Relics of Thiala comes to a satisfactory conclusion, but this series is just starting. Packmasters #2, Raid on Sullin, is due in autumn 2017.

– Fred Patten

• Buy on Amazon

Battlecats is a new fantasy-adventure comic book series written by Mark London and illustrated in vibrant full color by Andy King and Julian Gonzalez. According to the publisher, Mad Cave, “In a land where chaos is embraced and war is the ultimate desire, order must be enforced. Enter the Battlecats. The most seasoned warriors in the land, fearless, determined, devout, this elite group travels the realm of Valderia fulfilling the King’s mandates and displaying heroism worthy of the God they worship. The Battlecats are about to embark on their most perilous quest, all while unraveling the origins of a holy war.” Shades of He-Man and, yes, Thundercats — in a good way. There’s a trailer up on YouTube. As you can see there, Mad Cave not only have several issues of the comic out but also t-shirts, posters, and even a soundtrack CD are available now.

image c. 2017 Mad Cave

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new ep! We really liked this one!!! We hope to see you guys at MCFC!!! ep. 158 - The Heinousanus Anus - new ep! We really liked this one!!! We hope to s…

Due to a family emergency, we're running a best of release this week - BUT it has new content! Smokescale has recorded new Space News for you this release, so you can hear about the latest from outer space. Here is the episode description from the original release: Roo and Tugs are joined by Marci McAdam via the internet as they discuss the world of badges. What do badges mean to many? What kind of impressions do they leave on others? What should be on a badge? What shouldn’t be on a badge? What are the rules of etiquette for badge commissioning?

Check the original show notes here.



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Next episode: Porn and the fandom. It’s ubiquitous. It’s arguably a part of the furry fandom’s DNA. It incites more reaction than most anything else with furries. What’s your connection to furry porn? We'll let you know what was sent in, next episode! The Best of FWIW – S5E13 – First Impressions, Much? (w/new content!) - Due to a family emergency, we're running a best of release this week - BUT it has new content! Smokescale has recorded new Space News for you this release, so you can hear about the la